A sorcerer appears and states that they will erase any one song from existence - which song would you choose?
A sorcerer appears and states that they will erase any one song from existence - which song would you choose?
This ability of the sorcerer will wipe any one song of your choosing from the pages of history, as if it never existed! Gone from our reality. They were going to do it anyway, but they're making you choose.
Which song would you pick?
(If you really can't narrow it down to one, then try narrowing to three)
~picture credit goes to zenart07 , DeviantArt~
No one's gonna say that marraiah carrey christmas song? Ok i'll say it, tha marraiah carrey Christmas song.
Last Christmas is a close contender tho
obligatory link to the Zalinki video
i listen to that all year
I will never forgive the Apple rep who came into our retail store and loaded up the store Homepod with A PLAYLIST OF SIXTY THREE DIFFERENT FUCKING RENDITIONS OF THAT CUNTING SONG and then locked it out so we couldn't change it back to normal human music. Said it was his favourite song.
I made a complaint and never saw him again. I've never seen an entire store's staff hate life more.
But then you'd ruin Christmas for the cyber goths.. https://youtu.be/eJc6-DgaQa0?si=M1w4RWEBfHW1_l3v
This is the way.
1-877-CARS-4KIDS
K.A.R.S CARS FOR KIDS
1-877-CARS 4 KIDS
DONATE YOUR CAR TODAY
runs screaming off a cliff, smiling through tears
Now accepting donations of land, buildings, and other forms of real estate!
Can I please donate the real estate this occupies in my brain.
1000%
You know all you’re donating to is to keep funding kids sitting in yeshivas so they can get indoctrinated to become Hasidic leeches off society. That’s where it actually goes.
Baby Shark. The entire time that ducking song was making it's rounds through society, I managed to avoid it. I knew it was repetitive and awful, and through good fortune and luck, it missed me completely.
Then I watched the new season of Umbrella Academy. Those motherfuckers.
The story of Baby Shark is kind of interesting. It used to be a camp song in the 90s. It didn't become ridiculously popular until the infamous YouTube video that everyone knows. Various people and institutions have tried to sue for ownership, but it was ruled public domain. Anyone can release their own version of Baby Shark if they want.
*motherduckers
The US national anthem. People will stand around before sporting events knowing that they used to do something but are mystified they can't remember what.
Happy Birthday
Somebody just posted this image in another Ask and I thought it was relevant:
Damn! I was going to say American Pie but I think you've got the better answer but I don't want to hear either of these songs ever again.
All I want for Christmas - Mariah Carrey
This.
I am so sick of that goddamn song.
She's defrosting...
The Song That Doesn’t End—we’ll finally rescue all those people who started singing it not knowing what it was.
But they'll continue singing forever, they just won't know what they're singing anymore.
Baaaaby SHARK! Do-da-dooo, baby SHark…..
I'd made it so long without hearing that song until it popped up in Umbrella Academy. Streak ruined.
I’d improvise one on the spot. just to prevent the erasure of others’ art. Nah, fuck that; Baby Shark can die.
4′33″. I hate that melody and would rather just listen to silence.
Same, I randomly hear it in my head way too often
Every time I try to remember how it goes, I can't hear it over my tinnitus.
My Buddhist friend thinks it's catchy.
At first, I was going to pass on destroying music, but then I remembered the anger I feel any time I have to see Peter Pan because, in part, the fucking racist shit that is What Makes the Red Man Red. Maybe I could work out a deal to erase the entire movie...
Before anyone attempts to defend it with, "it was a product of the times", know that the play Peter Pan is based on was considered shockingly racist at the time and Disney's solution to that was to double down on the racism so that nobody would take it seriously.
Peter Pan is a very weird movie. Peter himself is pretty questionable.
Queen's Radio Ga-Ga so I won't have PTSD about it anymore. When I was 19, I worked on a cruise ship that was still in the final stages of construction and at one point they were testing the PA system by playing that song, on repeat, for seven whole fucking days.
Are you sure it was a cruise ship and not some sort of squid game shit? Because that sounds like actual torture.
If there was anyone else aboard NCL's Pride of America before it left dry dock in Bremerhaven around 2004/2005 that is also on Lemmy, they'd be able to back me up. But there is a good chance everyone else who suffered with me is locked in the loony bin from having heard Radio Ga-Ga for a week.
Oh, probably this song or one like it:
Yes, it was a real song, published in London in 1900.
fuck, it gets worse the longer you look at it.
"...he sold the wool from off his head" wtf
Thanks, I hate it.
There are a few explicitly racist songwriters from more recent times that don't have any historical aspect.
"Last Christmas"
Definitely that one. Since I can select the radio station without taking the hands of the steering wheel, it is "next station" as soon as it starts.
My wife loves it, I hate it with passion.
It's strange. It's for me like All I Want for Christmas Is You by Mariah Carey.
The first time it's played at Christmas time I get in the mood. The following times I want to throw out my radio.
They did. You're welcome.
Good point. If the wizard did this you also would never know that such a song existed. Hence your "worst song in the world" spot would be filled with a different song the instant the spell hits.
It shows how such categories as "the worst" and "the best" are only constructions of our mind.
Because it's already starting again, "Last Christmas". Fuck that garbage piece of shit song that's ruining the lives of everyone that has to work in retail during Christmas.
I love this song.
I'm very happy for you.
That was far the from the worst IMO, The 12 Days of Christmas played 3 times in a row by 3 different singers once, I almost quit on the spot.
Happy birthday song.
Now it's even more awkward as everyone must stare in silence in front of the cake 😈
what day is today, it's nibbler's birthday, what a day for a birthday, lets all have some cake
Hello sorcerer. Please erase "Man, I feel like a woman" by Shania Twain. It annoys me anyway, but it not like it makes being a woman sound especially inspiring either ("Colour my hair, do what I dare" - woah, slow down there Shania!). Thanks.
So shall it be done.
"If I Could Turn Back Time" by Cher, thus proving to her for a fraction of a nanosecond that her premise was actually possible after all, before every trace of the tune ceases to exist.
Came here to say Believe. Fucking Auto-Tune.
Ugh, so gross. Also a good pick 👍
last christmas 😁
I firmly believe you have identified the correct answer.
A lot of other song suggestions in this thread are actually decent and come down to taste, but this fucking song came to mind immediately.
The American national anthem, please.
It's such a terrible song, and it keeps getting sung in weird ways by bad singers. I swear, as a non-american I'm subjugated to it more often than all other national anthems combined, including my own.
God Save the King/Queen wants a word.
That Mariah Carey Christmas song every single retail worker hates
It would be irresponsible not to.
Maybe the COPS theme song, cuz I think it did a lot to popularize the show and that was some mega-potent copaganda that did long-term damage.
Maybe Horst-Wessel-Lied, for similar reasons.
Never Gonna Give You Up just so it breaks the Internet.
I actually quite like Weezer, but goddamn that song drives me nuts for some reason I can't put my finger on. A close second is Bubbly - Colbie Caillat, in large part because of the line "I get the tingles in a silly place". It's such a deranged way to say you're horny.
I think Beverly Hills is supposed to be grating. Like the people from Beverly Hills.
Last Christmas by Wham!
I'm just a kid who's four Each day I grow some more I like exploring, I'm Caillou
So many things to do Each day is something new I'll share them with you, I'm Caillou
My world is turning Changing each day With mommy and daddy I'm finding my way Growing up is not so tough 'Cept when I've had enough But there's lots of fun stuff
I'm Caillou, Caillou Caillou, I'm Caillou
That's me!
Given the fact that your question has caused The Evil Song to get stuck in my head, Sorcerer, I feel you are obligated to erase "It's a Small World" from my mind and from existence.
Please and thank you.
If you have been troubled, be troubled no more.
Dude Looks Like a Lady by Aerosmith
Yeah, at least that other "product of its time" (TM) song about being surprised someone at the bar is trans sounds decent. Dude Looks Like a Lady is just bad.
Baby it’s cold outside.
Seems to be America’s favourite rape song played for the entire cold season.
I was under the impression that this is a misconception about the songs meaning.
At the time women would be expected to say no outright and go home. To say they have to leave, instead of having autonomy and being promiscuous.
So in the song the woman wants to stay but is following the societal expectation to say they need to leave and the man is giving her all the excuses she could use to explain why she didnt leave, so people wouldnt suspect her of staying over to have sex.
These days that expectation is not there so the song is interpreted in a different way and sounds super rapey.
To be clear. I am not advocating for this old way of thinking, nor am i saying i know the explanation i have given is true. I am only telling what i have heard and felt like to me that actually makes a lot of sense in the right context.
Basically, women wanted to be able to have sex with anyone they wanted, but people would look down on them for doing it. So, to avoid being ostracised, they would avoid situations like that.
But again. I may be wrong. I have just heard this explanation and wanted to share.
Damn it is pretty pushy now that you mention it
Santa Baby is also pretty gross. "Hurry down my chimney tonight" ...urm, okay..
The United States of America National Anthem.
Jesse's Girl. My high school used it daily in an ad for some bullshit they wanted to sell, and my first 10 working years they had a radio on wherever I worked on one of three stations depending, all of which play that song at least (at least) once a day every day. (That's at least daily and sometimes twice a day exposure to that garbage song for 14 years straight for anyone counting.)
If I hear it come on I will leave the room, and I'll be back in 3:14. Idgaf where I am. If I have the aux (it won't be played, but if it somehow does) I'm changing it. If I hit the lotto I'm buying the rights so nobody can play it on the radio and taking it off streaming so I can lessen the likelihood of exposure. I'll put it for free on itunes or some shit and never strike pirates but for the love of god please don't play it near me!
That song’s protagonist is such a jealous, insecure piece of ass. I totally approve of that song being erased from existence.
I thought he wanted to be Jesse's girl for a very long time.
Either the British or American national anthems, they're both pretentious as fuck and it'd be kinda interesting to see if something like that has knock on effects down the line.
I'd say the American one because as a British person, I haven't sung ours once in my entire life but Americans seem to sing theirs for everything.
Santa Baby. Frickin' hate that song...
Seantah baybee...
Mr. Brightside by the killers.... fuck that song, fuck that song so much. My hatred of that song extends to everything else the killers do without ever hearing them
It was only a kiss...
Guess what? It's been in the charts consistently for over 8 years and is currently #61.
Never move to Britain then. It's essentially our national anthem at this point...
Just pick anything from 21 Pilots. I'd wipe them all out if I could, but deleting one is at least a step in the right direction.
20 pilots?
This.
I choose this comment as my song to delete
Intro song to star trek enterprise
It's been a long road getting from there to here.
It’s been a long time, but my time is finally near!
You monster
Bird is the word, fuck that song and on a similar note, fuck Peter Griffin.
Everyone's ragging on the Christmas retail ambience songs, but at least you can mitigate the risks of hearing those ones by staying the fuck out of shopping malls. My top three:
- Cotton Eye Joe
- Whatever that song is that's basically just "tonight's gonna be a good night" over and over
- Danza Kuduro
The second song is "I Gotta Feeling" by The Black Eyed Peas
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwdrtwZiQ9E
For the sake of that one poor woman, please delete "cbat." It's done enough damage.
Sweet Caroline. No question.
This is extremely brave
Whooo ooooh no.
Since I choose, am I aware of the song being gone afterwards? Can I choose a Beatles song that the world loves and then “write” it and profit from it? (See the movie “Yesterday”.) It’s interesting that a lot of answers are “get rid of the song that I don’t like. Okay, I get that. But! If I’m aware that the song is gone afterwards, I’d choose whatever the most sung religious song is just to see what that affects.
Unfortunately, you must understand, as you are part of the reality you inhabit, you could not be aware of a song that never existed.
The goddamn Macarena.
The Chicken Dance.
You can't just ruin Oktoberfest like that. You're a monster.
That dance monkey song.
ugh i take psychic damage whenever i hear that song
Omg I had to scroll too far down for this... I detest this song with every fiber of my being. Unfortunately for me my beautiful children think it's amazing.
Kars 4 Kids.
lol especially because it’s advertising a fraud operation.
A Kid Rock song and there are so many good candidates I can't decide.
The boys are back in town. I never liked the sing to begin with, but when I first started my apprenticeship I was working in a valley that only had a couple of radio stations and the only one I liked was a classic rock station. Apparently one of their DJs loved it though. They would play it every day at the same time, just when I was getting out of work and getting on the highway to head home. It ruined my afternoon for about a week until I realised they were going to play it everyday, and I just started my ride home in silence. It still irritates the shit out of me when I hear it now.
Oh! I got a similar story. My first roommate in college had a Police CD, Every time you got in it started at the first song, Roxanne... He NEVER changed the CD.
I never was a big fan but by the end of the year I hated that song.
it is such a pathetic song....remember that one time that guy did a thing and we just died laughing? remember that? That was cool....
Happy birthday. Just to see what replaces it in NA
The song that never ends, A paradox will occur wiping out of existence.
Pearl jam last kiss.
I just hate it.
Keep who let the dogs out, keep the witch doctor, toss the last kiss.
Them's fightin' words!
Tricky, theirs is a cover version, so the original would still exist.
Updoot
Pour Some Sugar On Me. God I hate it so much.
Rule Brittania would be a good one to rid history of.
Near, far....whereeeeeeever you are.
And with it delete Matt Mulholland's beautiful rendition on the recorder? I think not!
Hotel California. I refuse to elaborate further.
You can check out (and delete this song) any time you like, but you can never leave! Muahahaha!
You’re evil lol.
Never gonna give you up
Never gonna get rolled again
I got a feeling that tonight's gonna be a good night.
But also so many more.
Paul McCartney's Christmas song. It's a blight upon all mankind.
I am so sorry. The upside is that this version might actually be so bad you can listen to it ironically.
The Twist, by Chubby Checker. Just to see if partnered dancing survives without it
Chubby's kind of a weirdo anyway, I'm fine with that. "Twist Again" isn't gonna make much sense anymore, but it's no great loss.
Guns and roses' remake of knockin on heavens door. I love Bob Dylan and refuse to let it ruin the original!
It is extremely bad
That crying taylor swift song “she wears short skirts”
Idk the name but her singing is super annoying in that
Happy Birthday. Just because I want to see what replaces it
For he's a jolly good fellow
'My Heart Will Go On' by Celine Dion
Feliz Navidad.
Edit: added YouTube link to make it clear that I was referencing a parody.
Happy Birthday, just because it'll be interesting to see what we all choose to do instead of singing that song.
It'll be just like movies and TV shows for the 80 years that Warner/Chappell music claimed they owned the rights. Most of them will probably be variations of "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow"
Emily - Joanna Newsom. I don't hate it whatsoever but ever since listening to Joanna, this song in particular, I haven't achieved that musical high since. Maybe in this altered universe it can be created once more so I can feel that joy and wonderment again - if only for a moment.
That's quite some praise.
Do I get to remember it? So then I can just make it again and say it's my song
Unfortunately, you must understand, as you are part of the reality you inhabit, you could not be aware of a song that never existed.
There's a movie about that scenario with the Beatles. Called yesterday.
The Gummy Bear song. I have no proof, but I think it has some kind of brain dissolving frequency.
English or German version?
The German one is the sound of my childhood. Haven't heard it since though.
Sweet home Alabama
Cuz fuck skynards
Fine, Free bird it is.
Imagine by John Lennon
At last! Someone else hates it as much as I do.
It's definitely a love it or hate it, I definitely hate it because it feels.. half-hearted yet too try-hard
The more I learned about John Lennon the more I realized why I got bad vibes from the millionaire who abuses those closest to him because he's rich and he can singing "Imagine no possessions, I wonder if you can."
American Pie - Don McLean It never goes away.... it's everywhere!
Thriller.
probably a hot take:- Turkey in the Straw
Not that hot a take if you look up the original lyrics though
searched it just now and yeah it's pretty bad
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Turkey_in_the_Straw
https://jimcrowmuseum.ferris.edu/question/2018/may.htm
https://thekitchentoday.com/ice-cream-truck-turkey-in-the-straw/
Pachelbel's canon in D for reasons explained here
Title and all? I would pick . If anyone disagrees, you're lying.
It would be pretty funny if nobody could make a song that's 4 min 33 sec long again though so 4'33" might be funnier
Jump, van Halen.
That "you used to call me on my cell phone" bullshit
Drake - Hotline Bling FYI
The whole of The Ramones catalogue. Basically just one song split into parts.
That stupid song that gets used in every Youtube short (Time and Hope - Cinematic)
Granted. Now everyone rolls back to Tobu - Candyland
Kokomo. It's just the worst.
I like the line about “my mom’s a rotten stink”
I like the Kidz Bop version
--deleted, you're welcome---. I fucking hate that song with every fiber of my being.
F*ck you very much for that earworm dude
Freebird. It's the audio equivalent of Hookworm.
Could I cut up my wish into just wiping parts of a few songs? Like the march tune from Tears of a Clown, the electronic watch alarm in Rock the Casbah, and the chopsticks part of Blinded by the Light.
The sorcerer indulges you this wish.
Georgia Satellites - Keep Your Hands to Yourself
I CANNOT kill this off my Spotify country list.
Spotify has a block button. I discovered this after being accosted by ICP.
Have you tried giving it a weddin' rang?
Delusions of a Savior by Slayer because telling Spotify to block it and never play it again means that Spotify will insert it into every other playlist
Friday
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rjTVmv8p7vo
This song. My freshman year roommate is probably responsible for a million of those plays and he ALWAYS played it at max volume on his laptop.
Either his mom filled out his roommate survey or the university didn't read them. That was a rough semester.
The Beatles - Number 9. Such a ruinous track on an otherwise wonderful album.
This might be controversial but I feel that way about Yellow Submarine. Revolver would be my favorite album if not for that song.
I agree. It kind of sounds like a kids jingle, and it's just too simple compared to the rest of the album, which has some of the most intelligent songwriting ever.
Crazy Frog.
That god damned Megan Trainor Gucci song. I hate it so much.
- Feliz Navidad
- Bad Day (Daniel Powter)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aktLRiWXfqg&t=11
This song ruined my life just a bit. Heard it on Beavis and Butthead.
Gaddammit! That’s gonna be in my head again for 5 more years. I had forgotten about it. I HAD FORGOTTEN!
You're welcome. :)
That one justin bieber song from when he first got famous
"Come On, Eileen" by Dexy's Midnight Runners. Fucking hate it. Mainly for the video, but also because it is horrible.
I'd probably be a softie here and just pick something obscure that would cause a minimal ripple. There are songs out there that I don't like, but if they get much play, it's because there are people who do like them, and they should be able to listen to their favored music.
What sorcery is this?!
The entire soundtrack of both Mama Mia movies.
No idea how it's called but the one that goes like "maya hi,maya ho, maya ha, maya ha ha"
I hate that song with a burning passion of thousand suns.
Wow, this is what's below this post in my feed.
https://slrpnk.net/post/13737444
Also, it's "Dragostea Din Tei" by O-Zone and you better not erase it.
Haha, yeah, I saw that post before finding this question.
I was thinking i can't think of a song, but yeah that would be kinda neat if it was just gone.
One of Jack Johnston's earlier songs. They all grated on me from the first listen, but they also seemed to follow me everywhere.
Thank goodness you didn’t say Jack Johnson.
I typed it correctly 3 times and my autocorrect changed it each time.
If you delete Banana Pancakes I'm deleting your spine
Black Hole Sun
Imagine
Mark Morrison - Return of the Mack.
Oh my god!
Entry of the Gladiators
If that song had never existed
Which military march would get turned into clown music?
Bohemian rhapsody - it's one of the greatest songs ever made, just curious to see how it would retard the progression of music.
Anything with Neil Young singing. Nothing against him as a person, just his voice… it’s hurts my teeth.
Brimful of Asha by Cornershop Steal my Sunshine by Len
My partner giving up 90s radio or wearing headphones would suffice.
the traditional "birthday song".
not thinking to much that annoying friday song
The Green song of limbo that everyone listened to in the early 2000.
Praise You by Fatboy Slim. I hate that song so much I have to turn it off whenever I happen to come across it. It's the drawn-out repetitive tones.
The logical search goes ..Mexico. accordion music. Then you pick from there. Specially the ones about the drug lords would be better removed.
But if we could go back in time and find whoever brought accordions over the puddle...you sonobabich. You think you had a good life since you're already gone, but one day we'll go back to fix the leaks on your boat.
It's a toss up between accordions and trumpets. One of them is gonna go titan or titanic first thing if I get to travel back in time.
My friend, the trumpet, well played, is one of the finest and most expressive instruments to ever grace earkind, how could you feel this way? Can deliver ~every possible emotion, a range of volume starting at "drunken disappointed groan" and reaching "holy shit ouch stop", only got a few little twiddly bits, fits in your hand. Shiny.
Defend your position!
Barbie song, hands down
That boy George song. Abba, maybe. Awful.
Never Gonna Give You Up, aka The Rick Roll.
Booo, get rekt butthurt boi
Go back to Reddit.
Brown Eyed Girl
Anything K-Pop. The world will be better off without any of it.
Nobody tell him about Country
Oh I’d take country any day over K-Pop… and I despise country.
What a total waste of incredible cosmic power! Tell me oh rotund and couch astride sorcerer; why focus on such shitty, spammy schools of magic?
Did you just say rotund?
Rubenesque didn't seem to apply.
Hey Jude.
NO! Don't make it bad.
Just take a sad song and make it better.
Too easy.
- "Tubthumping" by "Chumbawumba". It is easly the most annoying and obnoxious song, and the lyrics are so stupid.
IF the wizard feels particularly generous, I have more:
- "Hey Soul Sister" by "Train"
- "All Summer Long" by "Kid Rock"
- "Dragostea Din Tei" by "O-Zone" (the maya hee maya ho song)
There are so many more, but just thinking of them makes me angry, so I'll stop.
I don't know you, but I hope you stub your pinky toe. Tubthumping is a goddamned global treasure and you're a bad person for disagreeing.
Yeah, the What Makes This Song Stink on "Hey Soul Sister" made me never want to hear it again for all my days
Hi it's the music police, your taste is criminal
That's a wizard. Anyway I'd be nice to trace back the origin point of rap and get rid of that. I hate that stuff.
You and I will never be friends
Good.
welp say goodbye to all rock music then. no more led zeppelin. james brown is gone too from the funk side. actually quite a lot of genres are gone now because of this wish. thanks a lot