No one should undertake hobbies because they are attractive to someone else. Unless you want to join groups where you can meet people you’re attracted to, then the activity is just an excuse to mingle. But you are more likely to find a hobby rewarding if you are genuinely interested in it, no matter what others think.
Right? Just the other day I was thinking about how many hobbies I dropped once I started seriously dating, and then later how many more when I had kids.
My guitar hasn't been touched in years. My books have gone unread. My 3D printer is getting a workout making organizational tools and little toys for the kids though lol
Let's see: I love reading, I am learning French, I paint, I write, I enjoy a bit o astronomy, I am an archer, and I have learned how to blacksmith.
Yeah this is just a list of activities with no correlation to attractiveness whatsoever
Edit: let me be clear, I've learned to blacksmith the cheating way with propane or natural gas AND the good old fashioned hand cranked coal fired away meant to coat your lungs with soot like a real man. And make sure you bring the borax cause we gonna do some welds
Judging by what I see on dating sites, fishing is near the bottom of the list. So many women's profiles say something like "I don't want to see a picture of you holding a fish"
It’s that men don’t take a lot of pictures of themselves. Then they refuse to take any specifically for their dating profiles. Taking pictures specifically for a dating profile would show that they actually care about finding a person they would do other things specifically for.
Taking pictures specifically for a dating profile would show that they actually care about finding a person they would do other things specifically for.
This is a dead giveaway that you've never asked men why they don't take and share pictures of themselves. Most men in the anglosphere consider it vain and self-destructive to obsess over their looks. You can also see it in the way they buy clothes ("I'll take 5 pairs of the same pants, thanks"), the way they cut their hair ("just take an inch off and even it out"), and the way they present themselves, often with as few accessories and adornments as possible. Those they do have are utilitarian or deeply personal.
It’s that men don’t take a lot of pictures of themselves.
I can't speak for all men but I have a complete inability to look even remotely normal if I know a picture is being taken of me. I try to take profile pics and they all wind up awful and that's not just my view. I showed my friend just to make sure it wasn't just poor self image talking and they reacted like I was showing off a broken bone. I think the only way I'm going to get workable dating profile pics is if I have a friend take pictures of me without me noticing like I'm some sort of cryptid and they'retrying to capture proof.
Unfortunately, the fact that they don’t take many pictures of themselves can be really obvious. I try not to turn a guy down because of a bad profile picture, because I know there’s a technique to it and that requires practice.
At the same time, we’re in a digital era - you can take 100 pictures and only upload your favorite one. There’s no reason for an average guy’s profile picture to resemble a mugshot.
I wonder if it is fishing itself that they don't like, or if it is the prevalence of fishing photos on dating sites. I know that a lot of guys post fishing photos on their profiles (probably because most men don't take many photos of themselves but will take photos with a nice catch), so maybe it just seems unoriginal or low effort. I'm honestly not sure, but my only point is that it may not be the hobby itself.
Agreed, I really don't think it's the fishing itself.
Half the problem on any dating site is the classic: 1. Be attractive 2. Don't be unattractive.
If the dude is holding a fish but looks like Chris Evans, she will probably still be interested.
On top of that, dudes holding the fish will overwhelmingly tend to look like the wrap around sunglasses wearing, goatee having, overweight, Trump voting cliche. Women probably build an association to not being compatible with dudes who love fishing after enough times of seeing that and connecting these dots.
I’m not into guys but as a woman I’m surprised blacksmithing isn’t higher. How am I supposed to be your knight in shining armor if you can’t make me some shining armor?
If you were into guys and said that on our first date, I’d be there on our second!
I’m getting a bit tired of home automation as a hobby anyway - i don’t meet many new people inside my home. 3D printing was next on my list but then I’d have to collect WarHammer miniatures
I've forged everything from aluminum to Waspaloy, from handheld to car-sized.
Unfortunately, I used an industrial press and lots of math. Not sexy. What respondents really mean is hipsters with an anvil. Then you're wearing an apron with no shirt, sweating, and smashing something hard and repeatedly.
To be fair, I enjoy both these things but I don't know that I would classify them as hobbies, more as something I do to wind down. I can see video games going into hobby or even profession territory but THC is just a medicine for me. A hobby is something that needs to challenge me, in which I learn things and get better at it.
So a foreign manga reader that likes to work their wood whilst drawing furry pics from said manga, and travels to cons to display subsequent art - is the most irresistible person to women?
(Should probably think about doing some public garden porn photography tbh)
It could also just be women thinking, "I'd like to visit _____ when I'm able, I want my partner to go with me." Working in a passport office, I've met a shocking number of men who have never left the US (or sometimes even the state) by choice. Then their wife or girlfriend wants to go to Mexico or something, and they come in talking about how they're only doing it for her and they'd never travel if it was up to them.
Anyway, I'd consider traveling one of my hobbies even though I can't afford to do it often - plenty of time is spent planning and looking at things to do, so it goes beyond just the few days of the trip.
I'm one of those people. I've never flown, rarely leave my state. My wife wants to travel, but we haven't yet. I, personally, have no interest in it. Just like sports and most popular movie franchises. I just have no feelings about it at all. It seems like a huge hassle.
I've met people who are extremely happy living in their small town life doing small town things, then get angry or confused why anybody would want to go someplace "exotic".
If they flaunt it with their fancy cars and designer clothes, I think they're gross.
If they look like a hobo but are highly educated about finances... Aaaaay bay bee how you doin? Wink at me, you economist with a 401K who ties her hair up because she hasn't showered in days because she was doing data science. Spit in my mouth, you engineer with a diverse stock portfolio who wears the same hoodie you wore in college because clothes shopping is hard and you want to focus on optimizing your CI pipelines. Choke me, you tenured professor with a mature retirement fund who dedicated their life building physics engines to teach grad students.
For the vast majority of you, long travel is required to get to somewhere you can backpack. And the the gear and foodstuffs is expensive also. And judging by the damages to the environment that some inconsiderate people leave these days, I'm not sure that you should be allowed to. (I'm getting sick and tired of picking up garbage and hauling it out of the forest I live in).
Or be in a religious cult like Mormons. Of course they will send you to a foreign country and confiscate your passport until your 1.5-2 years are over.
I remember listening to some pop song and realizing that it was basically "You love me 'cause I'm rich". Do you like trashing hotel rooms, going places you have never been? I don't remember what song it was or the exact lyrics, but I just hated the guy then and there.
That’s because the deal has already been sealed. They typically wanna keep you off the market, not increase your “resale” value. Unless you’re into that kinda thing. Like, cucking or sharing kinda kinks, not human trafficking. Human trafficking isn’t sexy. Unless you’re into that kind of thing. Like, as a fantasy, not as a real thing. Real human trafficking isn’t sexy. Unless you’re into that kinda thing. Like, as in humans stuck in traffic or transforming into cars and being stuck in traffic, not as being sold as a commodity. Unless you’re into that kind of thing.
I have a friend who’s very attracted to her husband’s woodworking. Mind you he’s a world class artisan for equipment for a shared hobby of theirs, but still, she’s very supportive of his lathe purchases.
Unironically, most of the women I've spoken too have found it attractive when I bring up 3dPrinting. It's an active and interesting hobby, and tangible & crafty enough not to be too "nerdy" or whatever. Perfect middle ground, women love it.
They probably just didn't think of it or it wasn't on the poll.
I can not fathom how blacksmithing is LOWER on the list than reading. "The dude with the hammer looks nice, but that other one over there is sitting on a sofa for HOURS on end"
Reading demonstrates culturing, education, pursuit of knowledge, and willingness for good conversation. It’s also a hobby that can be practiced together (my wife and I have even devised a technique for how to best read books together)
Blacksmithing is one of the few hobbies that a guy probably can’t teach his girlfriend because women usually use a different technique to make up for strength differences. It’s hot for sure, but it’s hot in a “I’m going to watch you but it’s expensive in time and money, and I may wind up stuck selling at ren faires forever” way as opposed to a “even when we’re old we’ll still be discussing literature” way
I read, write, cook, paint, swim, travel, and hike, and last gardening. I should be rolling in it. But my wife finds me sexy so I got that going for me.
Tl;dr: any interest is interesting and attractive. In particular if it can be done without annoying your partner and shows your ability to think independently. If it produces something useful that's cool, too.
When you are making everything from scratch, cooking becomes a hobby. You can make tacos and buy a salsa from the store and make some good tacos, but when you are making the salsa and thinking that you should add just a bit more of something, you are in hobby territory.
Smoking meats is a hobby. To get dinner ready, you start at 3am and tend the firebox all day. You try different rubs, woods, and techniques to make the product of your craft the best it can be.
Making pizza from scratch is a hobby. You make may make dozens of pizzas to just get the sauce, dough, or crust right.
Following a recipe to make something is not a hobby unless it is just a starting point in something you wish to refine and make your own.
Smoking meats is a hobby. To get dinner ready, you start at 3am and tend the firebox all day. You try different rubs, woods, and techniques to make the product of your craft the best it can be.
3am?!? What tiny little brisket are you doing at 225 to start that late? You've got to leave time for it to rest.
Ok, in all seriousness this is one of my main hobbies. By that I mean I do it often and I've stuck with it for years while other hobbies have come and gone. I've got a couple of offset smokers, a drum smoker that I built, and a pellet smoker when I don't have the time to tend the firebox but still want to smoke something.
I said all that to say this: there are plenty of people who couldn't give two shits about smoking meats who absolutely come ask me questions about it. Not because I'm the best, and not because they want it to be their hobby. But because I'm excited to talk about it. I also tend to bring full plates with me for my friends (and usually a couple of extras) so they get the benefit of having food.
I've also had women ask if they can come hang out next time I crank up the smoker. It's an easy way in for someone who wouldn't normally be confident enough to approach you.
When you worry about the brand of the olive oil you use and the cost, (over $100 per knife), of your kitchen knives. And your stove is a $4000 induction model with 2 ovens.
Source: My one Son-in-law. But the son-of-a-bitch CAN really cook!
I have two Kitchenaid mixers, and all my specialty tools. Cooking and baking can definitely be a hobby. We have the meals to survive. Then we have the shit I make that tskes a list of ingredients a mile long and all day to accomplish. But goddamm they are some great food.
There are a surprising amount of old kids that can't even boil water for pasta. No one looking to date wants to date an old kid they need to take care of. (Some people do, but burnout is real)
Yeah I burn the kids out of pizza and calzone for awhile when I got into pizza making. I had to try many different ways to make it so we ate it everyday for a week.
Cooking qs a Hobby is not throwing together a Quick meal, but actually making an effort to cook. I.e. trying new things, cooking homemade pizza or even a roast.
"throwing together a quick meal" should have it's own word.
"cooking" to me implies you're working on something worth the time it takes, something you want to put effort into.
But when I just got home, nothing is easy to make and I have to throw something quick together, it doesn't feel like really cooking to me. Like im half assing it, it should have a half-assed name.
Exactly, I am always looking for new and exciting things to try. Also subscribe to shit ton of cooking channels on YouTube, and blogs. Also subscribe to a magazine subscription which I was exited that I could still do that. Also have a ton of cook books and always looking for more.
So, lots of Linux fans should be fairly attractive. Like we read (the docs), know a few languages (at least bash), occasionally write scripts, travel (between distros), and archers became a huge meme 🙃
But you annoy users with unreliability and difficulty to repair and time to implement. UX is important. You can't have home improvement work sites lingering.
It's a shame being attractive is the most important thing about being attractive lol
I'm into cooking, astronomy, photography (astrophotography), and hiking. Used online dating (listed all those things) for almost 10 years and went on something like 7 dates. Still single lol I just gave up about a year ago
I have a few in that list too and yeah, online dating is really rough. I've had way more success meeting people IRL. Now that I'm a proper adult though, my hobbies don't really expose me to meeting new people and that's where it gets extra hard. Still haven't found a solution to get me out into public to meet people, friends or dating.
That's a pretty big issue of mine as well. I'm 38 and I live around a sea of old people. Not only is where I live too expensive for people my age, but there isn't really anything to do where you could meet someone. I have absolutely no interest in going to a bar, I don't even drink anymore.
Online dating is the most damaging and predatory thing for man. I think at this point research shows quite clearly that is very detrimental for men's mental health
All the nerd hobbies are at the bottom of the list scoring negatives. Linux, video games, Warhammer, D&D and other, etc. this is why despite playing a music instrument, I couldn't get laid.
Eh, I find a lot of people the attraction is towards the person themselves and that makes them more interested in their hobbies anyway. Like if someone is into you, they'll probably try to take an interest in Warhammer or whatever because you're into it.