I hate so say it, but you should grab Michigan and Wisconsin. Much like a girl I used to know: We can fix her, and she has huge lakes that I find appealing. Or something like that.
and then Illinois, or at least Chicago
Huge, COLD, lakes mind you.
Isn't Wisconsin like a cold version of Alabama?
What the fuck did you just say?! Are you suggesting that we are inbred? Alabama! Fuck you!
Wississippi
Only state to have (I think) four presidential elections decided by less than 1%.
The states motto is "Forward" and it used to be one of the most progressive states, but it was also the testing ground for the Koch bros media network, that plus the gerrymandering from 2010 really set us back.
You move that gods damned line to include Michigan. Right fucking now.
Nope. Move to a real blue state if you wanna come. MI has betrayed us too many times. We don't need that in New Canada.
As a Michigander myself I fucking demand this also
The entirety of Michigan? Or should the Upper Peninsula stay a part of the US?
/c/CartographyAnarchy is leaking
Michigan is a red state though.
Illinois is the real loser here.
Colorado
You re-elected Boebert.
I'd be willing to leave eastern Colorado behind.
man Colorado is an unfortunate one in this case. =(
On behalf of California, we accept this proposal, and we accept Canada as our new federal government.
I also propose we officially refer to the remainder of the US as "Dumbfuckistan".
Accepting pleas from other comments here, Canada could get away with about this. And if they have the whole Pacific border, I'll also throw in Hawaii for free.
We should give Texas to Mexico just to spite them
Brilliant.
Hm. Went with cutting Washington and Oregon in half rather than full take. Pretty bold, but makes some sense.
Theres citylife washington and middle of nowhere washington. Occasionally middle of nowhere washington likes to throw fits in the city to support trump because they have nothing better to do
Though i guess that goes with cali as well. Lots of the non cities in the west coast just really love trump despite reaping all the state benefits that are very non-republican.
Eastern Oregon is already trying to join Idaho anyway
Y'all are going to regret taking Arizona. And, frankly, everything in California not in view of the coast.
I think they'd maybe rather be independent?
I don't think this is framed as a takeover.
Listen.
MD will take Pennsylvania and bring it into new Canadania as long as we can bring West Virginia with us too.
They’re dumb but they’re our dumbs.
You don't wan the middle of PA... Maybe if they just turn everything between Philadelphia and Pittsburgh into a weapons testing site? Turn it into "no man's land" like it was always mean to be.
A couple tweaks: Include Illinois and the eastern part of Pennsylvania. (edit: I see you did get Chicago, maybe just go a bit further south?).
why not Alaska too?
Oh man I'd love to see the civil unrest in the red States when they don't have us new Yorkers to give them their welfare payments.
Same from the west coast. If only cali oregon and washington could just be a west coast alliance separate from the rest of the problem states.
Why would I want to join Canada???? I don't do well in the cold smh my head
-Life expectancy will go up from a world ranking of 48th (USA) to 20th (Canada).
-Education will get better from 31st (USA) to 19th (Canada).
-Math scores will improve from 34th (USA) to 9th (Canada).
-Robberies will go down from 98 per 100,000 population to 62.
-Traffic accident deaths will drop from 12.7 per 100,000 to 5.3.
-You will spend half as much on health care yet get better outcomes.
-Poverty in Canada is 1/3 the rate in the USA.
-Although Canada has fewer millionaires, we more fairly distribute wealth (better income equality).
-The minimum wage in Canada is double that in USA.
and most important you will be happier (Canada ranked 15th, USA 23rd in happiness).
(We couldn't find a politeness index, but thank you for reading)
Wouldn't you get most of the millionaires and billionaires by including California and New York and the stats will start going to the US level or worse?
ITT: People pretending that Oregon, Michigan, and probably Washington don't have a huge population of total fuckos.
Carve a line down the coasts. You don't want the whole state. And while you're at it, take the lakes and Chicago
Canada also has its own population of total fucks. We keep them in the prairies. However like those states, it might be leaning more towards wanting that?
Disclaimer: not a source, just an ass on the internet.
So u r a source
An ass source but one we shan’t judge
Yeah, East side of the cascades in OR and WA is extremely conservative. But they are currently hopelessly outnumbered.
We had to accept Oregon in order to draw a line down to California. We sure as FUCK aren't accepting Idaho.
You don't have to take states in their entirety, you know. No reason you can't split them up
How about sky bridges between fortified independent city state enclaves?
I'd take it.
Eastern Washington people have been wanting to separate from Western Washington for a really long time. Western Washington is like "well fuckin do it." But nobody actually tries to secede because EW's dependent on WW's economy.
Exactly. Canada should only take the west half.
So...there's a correlation between a lack of access to large bodies of water, and support for trump ?
Big cities tend to get build near water and denser populations (exposure to a greater variety of people) tends to make them people less conservative.
The more remote you are, the more likely you are to be isolated in an echo chamber of xenophobia.
Oregon is already trying to redraw their state border with Idaho. Could just do that.
Is the US losing just about all of the top universities in this "trade"?
Where they’re going they don’t need no universities.
FTFY "Wear their gohing they ain't ned no skulz"
Losing CA alone would make the US possibly not even a world power. NY and CA gone, the US Would be a thing no one really has a reason to think of talk about. Suddenly all the movies would be about aliens landing on Canada or blowing up Canadian national landmarks.
Nobody's going to go there after abortion is banned.
Nobody wants their prince or princess saddled with that.
Seriously, why isn't the Canadian government offering US states to join them? It would be the perfect response to Trumps bullshit.
You want Canada to submit to the US? Hey Oregon, California, and the others, wanna join us instead?
If California leaves the US it would fucking bankrupt the US.
Washington State: "Come on! We're right there. Are we a joke to you and just here for you to shop?"
America has already proven it's willing to go to war to keep territory, Canada doesn't want that fight.
On top of other responses, lots of folks are saying the conservatives are coming to power in Canada. Those conservatives would hate upsetting their advantage by contending with what would be an overwhelmingly liberal population.
Because Canadians don't want it so they wouldn't be representing our best interests
Congratulations you just gave the fundamentalist nutters all the icbm silos.
Yeah, uh, they already have them.
Plus there's tons in the listed areas?
Naw WA has a few
WI and MI want in on that, for sure
Well, MI at least
Milwaukee and Madison at least..
MI voted for the orange bad man so... no...
As somebody from Wisconsin I will say that I don't approve of us being excluded, but I also can't blame them.
I’d include you
Yes. Need Michigan or Detroit area if alternative is to destroy big 3 auto industry.
Australia can come too. THE END!
Edit for the young ones: this is older than YouTube. It was a flash animation which was like a 2d game engine that ran in-game cutscenes in your web browser because that worked on slower internet speeds than video.
Solving the problem is dissolving all borders so the working class isn't divided into easily managed nation states.
If you go by recent province/state wide election results:
Alberta, Saskatchewan and probably Manitoba go to Jesusland.
... And Colorado and New Mexico, and Illinois become exclaves like Kaliningrad.
CO+NM is exceptionally fucked because its landlocked, and almost in a Lesotho situation (being wholly surrounded by a single other country) were it not for Mexico...
Though I guess Illinois would not be much better off as Jesusland would likely claim it owns all of Lake Michigan beyond 50 miles of Illinois' shore.
And Virginia actually went for Harris, so that's also part the United States of Canada.
Actually, only 19% of Albertans would want to join the US according to this poll . I'm surprised too. It really looks like these people are a loud minority. Or that at least being more conservative doesn't necessarily mean wanting to become part of the US.
Im going by functional votes for a conservative head of state, not wanting to join another country... or seceede, cough Quebec cough Texas cough.
Probably all the same town groups. I wonder what is the lead level in those water.
United Provinces of Canada.
Manitoba has the NDP in power now!
Last election turnout was heavily influenced by Netanyahu. Swing states in general are more open to better options than Trump, that Harris just failed to impress. Trade with Canada important to all of them.
Trump: Fine, they can have California for all I care.
Advisors: Sir, if California were its own country it would be the world's 6th largest economy.
Trump: How about if we just send all the Mexicans there with some beautiful rakes?
5th largest
Wonderful news, everyone!
They are already here. Who the fuck you think does the farming?
They've been there since like the 1500s. Lol.
lol @ New Hampshire
Also, that would be about 37% of the US economy. California making the highest percentage at 14% of the US economy while New York would be in 2nd place at 8%. The least impactful would be Vermont with 0.2% (for got to include Rhode Island). However, I think this would wreck the world economy with the financial hub of the US (New York City) who manages the investments of world's reserve currency (dollar) would switch from US Dollar to Canadian Dollar. The US would also lose access to the Pacific and a considerable amount of military force stationed in the West Coast states.
Not to mention half of the important US ports. The states left would face a harsh reality when everything tripled in price as all the goods that used to be subsidized by the rich states are now hit with import taxes as well.
As a resident of New England, I'm ok with all of these changes.
It would be harsh both ways when the US damns the Colorado River, and California really dries out.
lol @ New Hampshire
fuckyouinparticular
The US would also lose access to the Pacific
donvict's gonna invade panama to take the canal back, remember? nbd.
Where can I vote for this proposal?
You forgot Colorado. But yes.
hello. illinois.
I’m accept Illinois too.
Excuse me but that incorporation of California, Oregon, Washington and British Columbia gets in the way of the glorious Long Chile Project. We shall be having words.
(By all means do take MN, CT and WDC tho.)
can you take Philly too?
Poor Colorado
I’m a Canadian and my dream is to one day fake my death and move to Minnesota where I can live in a small cabin away from anyone.
Michigan belong to Canada
Can someone ask r/askconservatives how they feel about this plan?
Canadian conservatives would hate it. It would foul their apparent momentum in also getting control like the conservatives did in the US.
West coast resident. I’m ready, let’s do it. The rest of the US hates us.
I'm neither American nor Canadian but from what I've heard, maybe hand Alberta over to the US?
I'm in Alberta right now and it's probably the place that would most likely accept that offer.
Maybe we could have BC come in and do a left wing inquisition. All the right wingers will be banished to the badlands and that will be handed over.
I wouldn't mind becoming a part of Canada so long as I still can get my financial aid for college. That, and we make it so anything coming in from Asia to the US has to either go to through us and we make them pay a little extra for it, or it be sent along another route.
I'd love this to happen just so the USA can steamroll Canada into their backyard.
THANK YOU for including Minnesota.
Hey don't leave New Mexico out, we're cool!
Hell yeah! Minnesota is in.
NY thanks you for your support. What’s the pizza/poutine exchange rate like these days? Haven’t been up north in years.
wait a minute... can we make Colorado a land island??!!
In this case that's called an "exclave" and yes, I believe there would be a large willing number of those.
Ah, the united states of poor america.
Michigander here. Home of the water, Canada's daughter. We're coming with you even if it's just for the hockey.
Agreed
Please for fucks sake Canada, annex New England and the New York City Metro area as war reparations when this shit is over. We're economically productive!!
Nooo, take Michigan, too!
The question is, would Canada want that? I get the feeling that most of us living north of the border just want to be left alone and we would send you all the thoughts and prayers we could spare and wish you all the best so long as you let us be.
Yes, they absolutely want it - minus the dumb fuck part of Canada (is that Alberta?) - west coast and north east USA are highly educated, powerhouses in industry, and basically pay for the welfare queen red states. It's so fucking crazy how the east coast and west coast are held hostage by all that land in the red states
OK, Alberta becomes part of America.
Canada cannot accept US rule because of US debt burden which is unsustainable, in addition to pensions, healthcare, and a demonic ruler under extreme corruption permitted by SCC. The US is a genuine shithole that is bound to collapse and, while that collapse will hurt Canadian economy, it is worse to be inside it.
Canadians like American people. Certainly, it is both an economic boom without sacrificing Canadian sustainability to absorb US states. A guide to secession written last time Trump won: https://www.naturalfinance.net/2016/11/opposition-to-new-us-republican-control.html
The big issue is US debt and the fair share of "leaving states". There is a fair number, but also an asshole version of the number.
A "future fiction history" of Canada assimilating the US one state at a time.: https://www.naturalfinance.net/2018/02/fictional-future-history-reclaiming.html
Thing is Canada shouldn't have its politics influenced by the US from absorbing it either. As a Texan, I can say both our politicians and voters suck. But there could be an easy solution around this problem. Canada could just absorb the US as a newly created Southwest Territories. Territories are directly under the federal government and have no government of their own. Canadians would get new land and resources. Americans would get better healthcare and to be ruled by a less shitty government. Everyone would win.
California alone would double your GDP...
Almost nobody would want this. Canada has the same size population as California and it already feels full lol
Absolutely not
We hate Americans
Not true, we hate parts of America. I see nothing wrong with the image. Those states are ones I actually like to visit. Hell in the beforetiimes there was never really a border between Vermont and Quebec. Whole towns were split between the borders, and people could walk across the border for a pizza across the street.
As a representative of New Jersey, I approve this message.
Maine is basically Canada anyway
My body is ready!
For healthcare!
Give Texas, Arizona and new Mexico to Mexico, and push all the white trash to Florida.
Lol I love how New Hampshire is just left out. Now how am I gonna get my New Hampshire clam chowder?
Yeah, what the fuck? Take us with you.
michigan is obviously already canadian _
Hand me the sharpie, you missed Chicao
Then hand it to me, you missed the g
Delegation from AZ would like to petition to join Canada.
I actually am not opposed to this. Am NE person, let’s do it.
Cut out eastern Oregon, they want to be part of Idaho anyway.
Same with eastern Washington.
Nah. Just say: we changed our minds, the South can secede.
Because all those minorities that would become literal slaves can get fucked, right?
As an Oregon resident, yes please!
Someone needs to post this to trump on truth or X or whatever he uses.
Populous wise Im curious to see if that just made Canada larger than the U.S.
The GDP is likely equal as well, if not higher in Canada at that point. CA is much higher than TX and NY is still higher than FL.
I think you will also have to put something in the budget for a naval blockade of New Hampshire, there.
And rename it New Kaliningrad.
Hey I'm North Carolina, can we get in on this?
Unfortunately, despite electing a democratic governor, lt governor, and AG the state otherwise went full maga in voting choices.
Which is why this would really suck for a lot of folks. Today they may not quite get their preferences at home, but at least other states are keeping it competitive and may mitigate things. If those states left, then everything falls into a fanatical Christian fascist ethno state with no impediments.
And Nova Scotia secedes 'cause fuck y'all mainlanders.
Whaddya at b'y? Crooked as sin ya leave us wit 'em.
Christ almighty, you Newfies gets yer own country too then.
Give Alberta and Saskatchewan to the US.
Let the US keep the eastern third of Washington and Oregon. Canada doesn't really want those people anyway.
New Mexico would like to join this proposal.
Canada 2: Canadama
Yes please
I'm pretty sure Nevada and Arizona could still be salvaged.
I'm not sure Canadians would want the 6 million Californians who voted for Trump (more than 38% of the voters in the state); or the 3.5 million New Yorkers who voted for Trump (42.7%). Maybe leave the mostly rural areas of the Dem states for Trumpistan?
Also the included states have a larger population than Canada, so it would be Canada joining the Dem states - which I can't see any sane 1st-world country doing.
Letting the Trump states become a country, and the Dem states (sans rural areas) become a different country, seems like it would make both groups vastly happier; tho it would require allowing at least a few years for people to swap states.
From humanist/freedom perspective, the right way to do secession, is first have a state/regional vote, but then allow subregions to also choose to be the exception. The divide in US is primarily Urban/rural. There is the issue that freedom is illusional everywhere including the US. You need to be enslave to the rulership, and not allowed to leave, even if we let Netanyahu pick our leaders through a theater of an election.
A warm Canadian place? Yeah I’d move quick.
Looks like I’m moving to NoVa after all
Please take me in ohio too. Please?
Id rather just move out of this state. Ohio kinda deserves this.
Youre definitely not wrong.
As a Clevelander I agree. I'm just over the lake. Take us too
Take the entirety of the Great Lakes. Lots of cities and resources to use to smite the rest of the US at a later date.
They can have the lake if they take the rest of us hayseeds!
Lose the green parts and you’ve got a deal
I for one support Canada as Americas headcrab
I don't want to share the great lakes with USA. Let's compromise and take the rust belt. There won't be enough of them to cause too much issues. Plus then we can get Chicago and Philly too.
the only thing I want is upstate michigan
Oh, God....please take Virginia as well! We're mostly progressive!
No you ain't.
I think I speak for all Georgians when I say please include us too (I definitely do not)
I wonder if they could somehow carve out a thin path down to Atlanta and include us. Pls.
They should get Florida too just so there’s this flipped symmetry kind of thing similar to the US + Alaska
We accept Florida only on the condition that you rename the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of Canada given its new proximity.
NOOO I LIVE IN NH TAKE ME WITH YOUUUUU
If you don't take Wisconsin with you then...
NO CHEESE FOR YOU!
Good luck getting them to swear fealty to HM the King of Canada.
This wouldn't be them joining Canada, it would be New California and friends.
It would be pretty easy to get rid of monarchy if we were to open the constitution.
No, please, take me with you!
I mean... Yeah, at this point, any government other than the one running CA is better for CA.
Oh stfu
Absolutely not.
The US can keep Southern California. Saves a lot of future bickering if they get to keep pacific ports.
You only want the west sides of California, Oregon, and Washington, and DC is on the wrong side of the border.
Canada should just take over the entirety of the US, a few reeducation camps could fix the red states.
