We like to sit you down, and show you a menu. We take pride on our chewable, edible food. These little fellers here are silverware.
This (gestures expansively to a cup) is what we here like to call a cup! It’s frequently used to hold liquids such as water, which is exactly what I’ve just poured into it.
Neat!
The ones that amuse me are the restaurants that don’t do table service, but still have a multiple staff on the floor and door seemingly only to tell diners they don’t do table service.
"All you have to do is scan a qr code, sit on your phone for 5-10 minutes to figure out our menu system, get water for yourself at the station over there, get your own silverware, pick up drinks at the bar, grab this vibrating puck, and pick up food on the other side of the restaurant. Don't forget to tip!"
The only thing worse is when they don't explain that, and you're stuck wondering why a waiter hasn't come over. Yes I understand that the QR code is a menu. No I don't think it's more efficient to change the concept of a "restaurant" after 5,000 years.
Best thing is, last place that did this had a unique "fusion" menu. It's not like the food was self-explanatory. So the waiters had to come to every table anyway, but it was hard to flag them down.
"Go get it yourself, you fuck! PS, can I have a 47% tip? It's pre-filled!"
My experience:
"Oh, well, here you need to download an app, consent to everything the app wants to do and register with your phone number. Then you can order and walk to the kitchen to pick up the food you ordered. Also, leave a tip if you enjoyed the service."
At least around where I am, the places that use an app provide a tablet with that app to order on.
That would be ideal. The place I visited did not provide any such options.
I would walk out and never return to any place that forces me to install an app
"We do family style, which means the portions are more than you can conceivably eat. That way you won't complain when we overcharge you by a factor of 10."
"We do ask that you not share..."
But if you do share, we'll be happy to charge a split plate fee.
"You try stopping her from sharing my food. I have yet to find success in that endeavor."
I run a restaurant, and encourage people to share. My burgers are 3/4 pounders on garlic Texas Toast, bacon, onion rings, spicy aioli, Dijon and fancy pickles with old white cheddar. If I can sell those for 17, turn a profit and encourage people with smaller appetites to order one and cut it in half, these chain restaurants with 1 dollar input cost instead of 6 can fuck right off.
I mean, you can always pay more money for those tiny plates they sell at super fancy expensive places if that's more your thing. lol
I once went to a pizza place that had a slogan like "pizza done different" and you went through the a chipotle style line and picked out crust, sauce, toppings, then they made your pizza and gave it to you. I couldn't figure out that was any different from a regular place.
They fart on the dough.
So still nothing different?
If it's chipotle style, then I would assume there's more e. coli.
I know both Mod Pizza and Blaze Pizza do this, so yeah, it's not any different at all.
Were they the the personal size ones? IIRC they are priced as such, and affordable to get multiple toppings it doesn't hike up the price. Also was a food court thing where the pizzas are made in like 3 minutes instead of 20. In a stone or brick oven. Idk that's dope imo I would love grabbing that on a lunch break.
Well you see, we have mild AND spicy salsa.
Plot Twist: The spicy salsa is mid at best.
They used an onion to make it so hot.
Bienvenido a España!
And BOTH are chock full of cilantro
Here at Restaurant, we offer "lonely singles style" dining. You order something you want to eat, and then you don't share it with anyone else. Unless they like, ask really politely for a bite, then that's on you. At the end of your meal, you ask for the check, then you wait like 20 minutes while going back and forth on whether you really need dessert or not, then you pay and leave!
Also you either pay us or up front. It's one or the other but we won't tell you until you flag us down and ask.
“You’ll be working front of the house. Your job is to walk around with these pitchers of ice water and ignore anyone who tries to get your attention”
Where's the "we want plates" lemmy community? I loved that one on the other site.
Be the change you want to see in the world.
I feel like this is basically every action horror story ever as well....
"Forget everything you've seen in the movies, the only way to kill a Vampire is put a stake through the heart! Guns are useless!"
Ugh, that's like D&D games where they're like, your character has no idea about what a vampire is because folklore doesn't exist in this universe so no one has ever shared a story ever.... even though the party has a bard who sings about things people have heard
Right? We don't need to spend 7 chapters of a 9 chapter story going "Why does this really old, really rich guy only come out at night and talk about not drinking wine!?!?!" When, the fucking cover of the story says "The Vampire Killer 3: The Vampire That Kills"
if your server is doing this it's because innumerable people before you have managed to fuck up eating out
whispers little bits
Eat some fucking shit you fucking stupid bitch... Hahaha just kidding
But if you say yes they say the same speal to remind you
To be fair, most customers that say they totally know how to do everything know precisely nothing and just don't want to appear ignorant.
we have something called a menu which you can choose your food from
Now before you get your food, you're definitely gonna wanna make sure you have the mechanics down, so I'd like everyone to just open and close their mouths a few times, get those jaw muscles good and warm because let me tell you, if you haven't had food before, you don't know how much you're going to need them in a second
That man isn't stealing your scraps or homeless, he's just bussing your table.
Oh, y'all still have wait staff?
We have "digital kitchens" now: https://stories.whataburger.com/whataburger-debuts-new-digital-kitchen-all-the-flavor-with-more-convenience/
Same wait without the staff, tables . . . or blackjack
Placing your order ahead for pick up at the new Digital Pick-up Lane allows our teams in the restaurant, whom we call Family Members, to deliver fresh, made to order food while reducing your time in the drive thru.
jesus christ
or blackjack
What about the hookers? WHAT ABOUT THE HOOKERS?
Reminds me of the bars around here that have replaced the wait staff, or maybe the whole wait staff but one overworked person, with QR codes that go to their online ordering system.
I've started avoiding them because it always takes forever to find someone when we have a question about the menu, want something specially made or customized, or have a question about an advertised deal or item, etc.
And that's why this shit won't catch on, people like you who don't immediately jump on "The new thing"
Yooo it's DC from Derrick comedy!
The only time I ever needed a waiter to explain how things worked was when I ate at a Paula Dean restaurant. That place did not work like a normal restaurant.
How was it different? How did it work?
People don't order individual meals. You order a meal for the whole table which is then brought out to the whole table to share. They provide unlimited refills of everything. So the whole table has to get together to decide what entree and sides they want. They don't let you take any leftovers home either. Everyone gets butter rolls and a dessert.
If you go to their site you can see the menu but your choices are a 2, 3, or 4 entree meal with 4 sides.
Fogo de Chao is unusual, too. The options are whether you want the salad bar or not, and what beverage. Otherwise, you have a thing that's red on one side and green on the other. If you want the servers carrying different cuts of meat to stop by to offer you some to put on your plate, you flip that to red. If you're good, you flip to green.
