I tried to use my real-name email for "professional" shit, but I always got vastly more action with my silly one. TBF it is kinda awesome.

Nonstick cookware still has to be cleaned, usually by hand. I can just huck stainless steel in the dishwasher.

That's the least insane part of the "article."

Sounds smarter to not use cookware with coatings that can be damaged from normal use.

It's nuts that looks like a bolt.

What kind of psychopath removes the entire brownie slab from the pan

That is the most inane Wikipedia page I've ever seen. Broken English, bizarre claims, and no real information.

Pffffff clearly I'm a Ravenclaw

No, it's everyone else who is wrong.

They're just becoming suspiciously more frequent.

Don't you ever scare me like that again

It was written by Diane Warren and only sung by Rod Stewart for "Patch Adams," the film for which the song was originally written.

Nuke the reflog

That basically backs up exactly what the other commenter hypothesized.

I keep forgetting to do this. I just upgraded my panel, time to pull another cable ...

Which war? Lincoln was shot immediately following the Civil War ...

And Lincoln

This is why all my passwords are on Post-Its

That can work with Alexa; there's a selection of different wakewords.

Both the milk and the cereal immediately taste disgusting once they intermingle.

Not sure it's possible to inhale it in the fractional seconds it would take to prevent any wetting from occurring.