Ooh, yes ape daddy! Pound my monkussy!
What a terrible day to have eyes
If there is a god, it must be a god of mischief for granting me the gift of literacy and setting me on a path to encounter your comment.
You have some interesting Kinks.
More I consume Christian media, more Satan looks like a better guy than God.
Well, in the Bible Satan killed no more than 20 people, and at the command of God at that. God killed millions intentionally.
John Milton seemed to agree, although I doubt he could have said so directly in 17th century England. He came pretty damn close, though.
Milton was a staunch Christian. It was interpretations of Paradise Lost a hundred years or so after it was written by the likes of William Blake, Mary Wollstonecraft, Lord Byron and Shelley that were the formation of Romantic Satanism, which in turn inspired the modern atheistic, compassionate Satanism of today.
You can always join The Satanic Temple! Very cool political activism group with sick shirts lmao
There are alternatives to TST that are not problematic in the way TST's leaders are.
Sometimes my mom calls a fanny pack a strap-on. This is like that.
oh I'm stealing that
I've heard those massage pads you lay on a chair and sit on called a "vibrator"
Hey Fuck-O! We like to call it inter-species erotica.
Satan uses Education! It was very Effective!
That guy has been topped by a gorilla ?
Yes. Not seen: the gorilla's leather outfit.
See my vest, see my vest, Made from real gorilla chest
Boomers and their outdated concepts. Don’t they know that millennials call their primate ancestors stepdad?
Having brain cells is satanic, evidently.
The effort people make to undermine education only shows how desperately it's needed.
There was one of these tracts from the 70s on evolution, where a christian student authoritatively defeats the stuffy science teacher, with what is demonstrably cherry-picked crap taken out of context.
At the end, the triumphant, humble-yet-firm student asks a by-now deflated science teacher how is it that protons in the nucleus, with positive charge, don't fly apart, the teacher shakes his head as he mumbles "I don't know, I don't know..."
I guess the student was implying that little angels kept the protons in place? Or that there are some things that are unknowable?
As if Quantum Chromodynamics, the Strong Force (and Strong Nuclear Force, slight difference there) and The Standard Model didn't already exist, as if quarks hadn't been detected beyond a shadow of a doubt.In his profound and cynical dishonesty, seems like Chick in his tract counted on information on the subject not yet being widely available at the time.
Chew on that one for a minute: Chick counted on the scientific illiteracy of the tract reader. Fanatical zealot that he was.
Sticks out for Harambe
Today's Chick Tract: Jack's barely disguised fetish
Isn't that all of them?
So, hell has education, the best music, strippers, drugs, all the cool people, orgies etc. Heaven has boring ignorant church people who find hetero sexuality more important then the love for their own child. So why would I want to go to heaven instead of hell? Christians aren't presenting a strong case here. When you're making shit up, why not create a heaven which is awesome instead? With our Holy Noodle, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, heaven consists of beer volcanoes and strippers. Hell consists of beer volcanoes and strippers too, but the beer is passed its expired date and the strippers have STD's. This is how you promote your fictional afterlife, like it's better then the alternative. I'd rather go to a place with hot strippers and cocain instead of a heaven full of unvaccinated babies and child molesters.
Important question: does it have garlic bread tho
Reminds me of a punchline to a dirty joke.
“Don’t you dare question how I [satan] torture them.”
I once found an entire stack of Chick Tracts, I stole them all to laugh at. Amazing to see in person.
They're all free on his website. I go there sometimes if I need a laugh.
I had no idea what these were. Then I realized I had taken some weird bookets from this one weird store. On the back they say CHICK. So I guess I have some chick tracts now. One is called "Love the Jewish People" and the other "This was your life!"
I loooooove Chick tracts. I collect them.
Always on the lookout for Lisa in which the family doctor lets a dad know that he gave his own daughter herpes but it’s okay because he helps the dad find Jesus and stop being a rapist. That one got pulled pretty quickly.
Ironic to rail against education so hard when you're literally sitting in a lecture every Sunday.
That's indoctrination though, not education. So it's fine.
At least it’s an ape and not a monkey.
Plus, being a squid, my ancestor was a snailish thing. And it couldn't fly, so to hell with it.
My favorite one is the Christian student against the professor. "Gluons aren't real because you cannot see them. Actually it is Jesus holding atoms together."
I can't see Jesus...or God......oh wait!
As someone who had to simulate the strong force, this actually makes a lot of sense.
If I were the professor, I would be fine as long as the student were to tell the definition of a Gluon when I asked them to define "Jesus".
A name is a name is a name.
"My ancestor "
Call it what you like. As long as there's no educating going on.
Shirts that go hard along with the "drugs" skull shirt.
Bruh, this is my post: https://lemmy.world/post/9544336
Kinky Nixon's brother; stick daddy
I wish I had gotten these when I worked retail, instead I got... blatantly bigoted shit.
The only one I ever got was right after the Soviet Union fell but while Gorbachev was still president and it was called "IS THE RUSSIAN BEAR READY TO STRIKE?" and it claimed that the fall of the Soviet Union was a ruse and Gorbachev was about to launch a nuclear strike because his name was actually pronounced GOGRBACHEV like Gog and Magog in the Bible.
It was amusing but the text was way too dense.
Don't kink shame
Papa don't preach
I think I just saw this one the other day! Is it "Baby Talk"?
Always said dad looked like a silver back.
Nothing quite like a Chick Tract to give a chuckle.
Swap the monkey out with a werewolf (or 14), and I'll call him by whatever name he wants. UwU
Oh my~
Reply "how did you know I was into old man on furry roleplay?" then when they go off on their god crap, tear it in half and toss it and yell "NEXT!"
