Tell my wife I now have "fuck you money", and then fuck her lots because she could quit her shitty stressful job and have energy again.
D'aw, I wasn't expecting something wholesome to be the first thing. Good job Lemmy
I would buy as much land as I could. Build myself a reasonable house and a load of barns. I have always wanted to run a farm animal sanctuary that takes in abused and unwanted farm friends. Then I would spend the rest of my days laughing at goats and cows and chickens being derpy. That and maybe take a nice vacation to the beach once in a while.
Why not just build your animal sanctuary next to a beach and laugh at derpy land and sea animals? :-)
Holy cow we have the same childhood dream!
I probably wouldn't quit my job because I like it. I probably wouldn't even tell many people I had that much money. My only debt is my mortgage so that would be gone. I'd probably buy a better house with an actual yard. Sell this house to my roommate for dirt cheap. (There's no way he'd just take it)
Probably do some lying that my brother won some kind of raffle and give him a bunch of racecar parts. Shit maybe even sponsor a race team or two, gotta get the young kids back in the sport as all the old guys retire.
I'd probably buy some land in another area, give myself a vacation house. But this wouldn't be immediate. Probably get a new car, mines pretty old. Build a greenhouse on my new property, have way too many rescue animals. Maybe even run a small rescue.
All this is assuming I've already set myself up for retirement and I'm good to go with everything else.
I probably would do the same as I love what the job entails.
I'm pushing 40 and basically have everything settled and really don't need a lot. Have my house, garden, friends, ect. Money would just be a nice stress relief at this point.
Only problem I could see is that at the place I work is a 503(c). So when/if the higher ups learn of my winnings, they'd either beg for donations or fire me.
Probably the former as the department is already short staffed and you need a license to do this job.
What job do you have?
Buy a nice home, upgrade it to my liking (CAT6 to all parts of it, solar panels/energy storage/network cabinet/make it watertight and safe for the next 50 years), buy a shitty looking van with a petrol powered pressure washer and indemnity insurance and spend my spare time going around cleaning paths and monuments etc. in my local area.
I ran cat 6 through the house we moved into over winter. The box, the guys running the cable and patching the walls after was like $1,200....not exactly fuck you money and absolutely worth it.
Ran it to the office, basement TV and office, family room, kids rooms and wife office.
If you want to do it, it might be worth exploring rather than waiting to hit the lottery.
A 1000' box of cat6 was is I think $150 or so. A couple of those and a couple weekends of your time = profit. Plus it frees up your wifi for phones/tablets/laptops/etc.
This post just makes me want to be friends with you lol
I want him to adopt me. Dad?
This is the best plan I've seen yet.
Order a pizza, don't want to make big decisions on an empty stomach
Love it!
Not tell anyone and see how little work I can do at work before they fire me. I bet I could even get promoted.
You sound like a straight shooter with upper management written all over ya.
Haha that's basically what I'm doing now
Not sure how much money that is, but I would start a "quiet landscaping" company that used reel mowers instead of gas mowers, rakes instead of leaf blowers, and I would undercut every landscaping company in my town just to promote the idea of a quiet neighborhood.
We signed up for a service last year that uses only electrified/battery powered devices (as opposed to IC engines), mainly just for the green aspect of it. But I'll be danged if they're not also like a third the volume of the gas ones! The first time they showed up, my wife saw a dude walking back and forth behind a push mower (looking out through the closed window of her office), and she thought he literally didn't even have it on yet. That's how much quieter they are. I think that's a damn good balance. Dudes with reel mowers and rakes are gonna be out there for like two hours every time they come; very not interested.
My idea was intentionally unrealistic and meant to represent an extreme. Your suggestion isn't just realistic, it already exists. Admittedly, I'm not really that interested in operating a landscaping company, I just want eliminate some of the unnecessary noise noise.
I could get behind this!
How specific, but also I love it
Massive underground dwelling. Not sure why, but that was my first thought.
Like hobbit house or prepper bunker?
Buy off all the politicians and have them implement policies that will benefit the working class. Invest heavily in renewable energy sources and public transportation. Buy all the comic books.
Start a housing coop and community land trust to keep housing in the hands of people that need it. Rapid public transport for the housing coop for work, groceries, etc. Buy the old tracks and turn them into intercity people carries.
Buy the land from friends and family to pay off their debts and give it to the community land trust.
Start a community coop grocery store, pharmacy, clinic, etc.
Start a community electric coop focused on being a microgrid first and connection the national grid second.
Start a community fiber and wireless ISP coop, and fighting tool and nail to end the current ISPs state monpoly on shitty expensive service.
Try and create guerenteed minimums for both so no one has to disconnect because the money istoo tight.
Yeah I'd do something like this as well after I spent the first few years fulfilling my hedonistic desires (travel, music festivals, language tutors, personal trainers and the fanciest IV supplements etc. etc.) I'd also bankroll a cooperative owned software platform that could compete with a major tech firm. So maybe like create a co-op owned Lemmy instance (or like social.coop) and promote the idea of online public good spaces.
Depends on the amount. If it's millions or double digits billions - just live life safely while providing for myself, family and friends. If trillions or close to one trillion - heavy investments, heavy usage, adaption and implementation of the plans to end hunger globally that were proposed to Muskrat by UN, development of similar plans to end homelessness, addiction. Immediate global warming countermeasures. Influence political agendas of countries towards implementing socially beneficial policies like UBI, robotization of manual labor. Basically taking off the burden off of working class and humans as a whole.
I would try to ease the life of everyone around me.
That's a nice answer
Pretty sure quitting your job would be the first thing most people would do.
But next up? Booking tickets to Japan to eat and drink my way through the country for a few months.
Pretty sure quitting your job would be the first thing most people would do.
I quite like my job, so I'd just reduce the amount of time I spend there to approx. 10 hours a week.
I would go for a eat and drink world tour. Every countries best dishes and drinks.
I'd do what Mark Cuban did with his Cost Plus Drug Company, which sells everything on it at cost + 15%, but for other essential products as well. I'd open up all types of stores that sell necessities - petrol, groceries, medication, plants, technology items, books, etc - at cost + whatever the lowest margin mark up I could get away with. The goal would be to drive prices down everywhere, not just at my stores. I'd also spend big on lobbying/campaigning for better legislation and regulation around essential goods and services.
Low cost public housing would be another area. Buying up land to build low cost housing estates with all the facilities and amenities needed.
Obviously it goes without saying I'd set up everyone of my family and close friends for life too.
I've had on my mind for some months to create a company to build "the perfect phone"
Repairable, big swappable battery, headphone jack, pogo pins for modular extensions, rootable easily and open sourcing a maximum of it.
So a mix between the fairphone and the librem?
What's wrong on both of them in your opinion?
fairphone has no jack and has an underpowered chip. The librem is fucking hell expensive and even more underpowered.
For the pogo pins i was more looking like the pinephone(s), but they are not power-efficient
What about pinephone?
I'l tell you what I'd do, man: two chicks at the same time.
I'd do absolutely nothing
Hire someone to manage my money.
Destroying medicine price in USA, by sellingi nsulin and other important medicines at affordable price. In my country, Insulin for pets which isn't subsidized by the government is far cheaper than insulin for human in USA.
Chad move
build an offgrid house
based
I'd pay off all my debts, put away enough to be able to quit my job without losing any income, and give the rest away. I already have everything I want and need, the move now is to get rid of shit I don't want.
What would you get rid of?
jobs, debts and obligations
Work on finding a way to sustainably help the most people.
You may not have to reincarnate here again if you keep those thoughts. :)
"Two chicks at the same time." - Lawrence
I'll start a non-profit company that does proper R&D and makes smart devices that's totally open source ground up from hardware and software maybe DIY 3D printable, communicating over an open protocol (matter probably) and managed by an open system/assistant, and extend it to an open self hostable ecosystem of everything AND make sure it's plug and play usable for every end user with installation service whenever necessary and other. And make it sustainable. It can only be done with "fuck you" money and never let VCs anywhere near.
Have a nap. Phone off, door locked, for as long as I want level nap.
Pay off my mortgage. And those of my siblings. Boring, but it's what I'd do first...
The very first thing? Quit work and drag the family for a long trip first to Japan, and then to Iceland.
After then, the important stuff. Start an IT school somewhere in West Africa, maybe an IT service provider. And while I'm at it, build a race track and try and build up a racing community. Preferably with local-built electrical vehicles.
Relentlessly lobby for right to repair.
I'd lobby to make political bribery illegal/actually enforced, then subsequently get assassinated mysteriously.
Suicide by multiple gunshots to the back of the head, but cause of death was the nine story fall.
Assuming "fuck you" money is along the lines of being able to give away money without feeling a hit, I think it would be very interesting to use the money to donate to small open source projects to help them grow and expand with new features and resources.
Set up a program for kids to get school supplies and lunch money, and also for them to get some gear for playing games (e.g. a "good enough to play most games" PC or a console)
This could also extend to hobbies in the arts like digital design software, paint supplies, instruments, you name it
As a kid I wished so much that something like this was accessible to me
Oh and also buy out adobe and make it's subscriptions one-time payments again lol
Buy Twitter back and ban Elmo
idk I quite like the changes he's making. Rate limiting, preventing people who don't sign up from using it, killing embeds. It's all great for reducing the net presence of what has become an almost entirely white nationalist platform. If anything he's not rolling out these changes fast enough, for if he was, Twitter would have also restricted itself from having new sign ups (like Voat in its later years) and eventually completely shutting down.
Bro what have you got against Elmo?
Lot of people really hate furries
It's definitely a tie between buying and remodeling a house in the city I live in (probably in one of the nicer areas in town but definitely not the nicest because I don't want to deal with stuck up prick neighbors who'd think they're better than me) and just going on an art commission spree of getting a red sheet for my fursona and then getting a very high quality partial fursuit and clothes to match his style.
Not sure what "fuck you" money is, but if it can buy me a decent gaming laptop, I'd use it immediately.
I've always heard it as "so much money you can literally tell anyone fuck you" or buy something ridiculous with that money as a middle finger to others
Ah, in that case I'd have to think some more.
Quit my job.
I'd buy a house. Not something huge, but decently sized riverfront property.
This makes me sad, because owning a house is an unattainable dream for most of us.
Buy a house, start my reptile projects, throw extras at the fediverse, the fediverse succeeding is very important long-term.
Buy all banks then burn them to the ground
That's a lot of fuck you money my guy
I'd try to start a racing career. Always wanted to since I was a kid but it's always been out of my reach.
Arrange my finances so that I can live an upper middle class life in a passive income. Give away the rest to charities that improve society (education, orgs that promote walkable cities etc. This would also include setting up small recurring donations to Wikipedia, Lemmy and other donation driven institutions).
FWIW Wikipedia has stupid amounts of money already.
Buy me an oil rig and open a hacker space there. Pretty obvious choice no?
Pay my parents retirement.
Buy large property, create an anarchist commune, build Earthships and similar housing out of sustainable recycled material, setup public gathering spaces, spa areas, perhaps stuff like rooms for artists, musicians, workshops, etc. Grow weed, shrooms and veggies, have some animals living in relative freedom and perfect health.
Ensure everything is weather proof based on location's projected future climate, build water/heating/energy infrastructure (solar, wind), offer each building as rent-to-buy, keep growing the community and make sure to plan for the day the government gets scared and sends in their death squads.
Basically something like Kristiania in Copenhagen but bigger and more focused on sustainability and land mass, so probably outside of major cities.
Addendum: Would be a good idea to make it impossible to have this grown into an insane religious cult though. 🌚
As cool as Earthships sound, I feel like they aren't a good fit for all climates. I'm in Canada, and unless you live in BC (and I'm talking Vancouver or the island), your only sustainable building option is straw bale.
Even if I could go further south to a more temperate climate, part of my fear is that anything south will get unbearable soon. Even Europe is going to be hot as hell.
I should add that I'd also take care of the more self-centered stuff like taking making sure my me and my girlfriend/*, parents and brother won't have to work a day in ours lives (unless we fuck it up but I'd try to find someone capable and trustworthy who would take care of it).
/* and since I'd never want her to feel captive I'd make sure all paperwork was done to allow her to walk with her money anytime, no matter what.
I'd buy myself a few mercenary armies and state armies as well as weapon manufacturers and just stop selling weapons and waging war. These people probably have skills as drivers or watchmakers, so Glock would start making watches and Wagner would be a chauffeur service.
I'll probably still have a division special force to take guns away from everyone in the world but police force in Democratic governments. As soon as they fulfilled their purpose, they'd have to hand in their guns to the local police.
My hypothesis is that every person with a gun is willing to part from it for the right price. And the others just have to go, I guess.
Buy a full tank of gas.
and what about the remaining $20?
I would buy the best health insurance. Whatever the 1% are using. Super Platinum Cadillac Gold Insurance. I would get my loved ones the best medical care in the world. I could fly them private to see specialists, I could afford 5000$ a month experimental drugs, I could extend their lives and the qaulity of said life.
Seems like a really shitty “fuck you” if all you’re doing is giving insurance companies more money with no benefit whatsoever to your loved ones considering it would be cheaper to pay out of pocket at that point
Yes, you're right, it is probably more beneficial to society to pay out of pocket, but even wealthy people have insurance in this country for a reason. Having insurance gets you better care. I don't like this system anymore than you do, but I have to live in it.
So... Altered Carbon?
Quit work and start a new hobby to spend serious time in. Not sure what that would be.
Doesn’t matter because you’d never hear from me again.
Leave my job & go and see the world. Possibly by finishing off my sailing quals & buying a luxury catamaran or trimaran.
Hell yes
A house or nice apartment.
Then I’d buy a private train to boast among the other rich people how much more climate friendly that is… pretty sure Davos has a train station, right?
Hire a permanent live-in nanny so wife and I could sleep soundly and stress less.
That’s first, the rest I would take time and decide and tell no one except the wife
Buy some politicians to get some positive shit done.
Dump all of it into researching how to grow tardigrades larger, until they are big enough to take down a fully grown man. Then build up an army of them and unleash them on the world.
With my tardigrade army giving me complete control over the world, I will begin enacting my ultimate goal:
Making that bitch Sarah pay for making fun of me in primary school.
"Fuck you" Sarah.
probably spend it on a bunch of landscaping for my parents yard to turn it into a "no lawn" (I fking hate mowing the lawn)
Same. NoLawns doesn't have to be expensive though. Just takes time.
Fuck you
Invest most of it to create retirement, medical, and educational funds later in life. My family worked hard to put us siblings through school. I intend to pay if back if possible.
Tax fraud
Pay off the debt of everyone in my family
I'd pay off all of my family's debt and secure them financially for life. Then I'd start a truly universal housing project in my city and state.
Disappear and become someone else.
I would build myself a mansion like the Le château de Moulinsart in Tintin.
Buy a house I like better. Get some large windows, better insulation throughout the house, some small degree of soundproofing between first and second floor, and pay for some serious landscaping in our yard.
Fire Fest 2
pay my debts, a full medical workup, some minor dentistry, then invest wisely after getting some financial advice from a professional advisor because I don’t really know what I’m doing.
First thing I would do? Without question a year-long holiday. I haven't had more than a few days off at a time for over five years.
Buy a nice reasonably big house, set money aside for my kid, buy a new car, help people close to me. In this order.
Buy a gaming PC and a VR headset, and then put all the money in investments and quit my job.
That's a trick question. After the end of civilization as we know it, no amount of money will do anyone any good, and that end seems imminent. There will be no such thing as “fuck you” money; there will only be “might makes right”, and I am far from mighty.
ow the edge
That took a dark turn, you might be right though
There are a number of people I would need to say “fuck you “ to
Pay off my mom's house and get it completely renovated, included hooking it up to the sewer line and completely redoing the foundation. I'd also add a second story with a balcony facing the direction of the ocean.
Relax.
Pay someone to organize all my stuff and buy the proper closets, boxes, etc everything. And bring my mom to where I live and give her a better life.
Buy a bowling center.
Finish the home remodel. Then try to find the best approach to handle riches I guess. Taking care of the kids, getting them towards an exiting life. Support my wife with her entrepreneurial dreams. Make sure my mom is well.
Reminds me of a quote from the TV Show Billions.
“What’s the point of having ‘fuck you’ money, if you never say fuck you?”
- Bobby Axelrod, Billions.
However to your question, live life the way I want. Simple as that.
Besides debt and housing I would just take my partner on a lot of trips and buy her a lot of gifts. It’s been a rough few years health-wise for her and it would be great to treat her.
I’ll pay all my debts and that of my parents and then start a new life in Hawaii
Go back to school start taking classes that actually interests me, instead of for a stable job.
I'd pay my debts first and then travel.
Pay the new car I just signed for, buy a teardrop trailer and go camping out in Europe.
quit my fucking annoying job
Pay everyone in my building several years' expected pay to quit all at once, except for one specific manager that everybody hates.
Not sure exactly how much money that constitutes, but assuming I somehow inherited a reasonably large sum of money, do mostly the same thing I am doing now.
Pay immediate cost of living expenses for myself and my partner. I don't have any expensive hobbies that I would need much more. I don't make a ton of money right now, yet it's still more than I can reasonably spend. After rent and food, like half my paycheque goes into the bank already. I am lucky to live in a country where I don't have to worry about an unexpected medical condition costing me millions.
The remaining would go towards charities/local political groups I am involved in. While not without precedence, it would be a strange look to be a stupidly wealthy socialist, and again the money would have no real use to me and would be better served elsewhere.
I'd probably just fuck myself.
I'd buy an old Land Rover series 2 or old Land Cruiser and drive around the high desert looking for shiny rocks.
Build my dream house with an architect. After that I would probably travel the world with friends and family.
I would:
- Buy a FU environment Car, and use 100% of the speedometer because I paid for it.
- Buy a FU sized house, and fill it full of ballpit balls, cocaine and hookers.
- Buy a FU size music venue, pay U2 to play at the venue, give free entry to everyone and arm them all with 4 cartons of eggs each.
- Throw a massive FU party on the biggest ocean cruiser, invite only the top 10% of richest people. Then scuttle the thing.
Do I have any money left?
- 50% goes to developing Australia.
- 25% goes to the Linux foundation.
- 20% goes to whoever is still alive in my family.
- 5% goes to lizards on the internet, because frankly, the cats are getting too much attention and they are wayyy overrated.
