Do younger people go home earlier now? Or go out less? Is it since COVID?
Someone asked a question about how frequently young people have time to socialize and it made me think about what people do with their evenings. I recently asked my son to go to a concert (free ticket to see a band i know he likes) and he declined because it was an hour away on a weeknight. If we invite our kids or niece/nephew to dinner they always want to go at 6/630 which feels so early.
Edit: Kids are 30ish.
Early 30s. Outside is a scam. Everything there involves spending money and dealing with people. I'll talk and play games with my friends online but don't see people unless I am at work or forced to go out.
Late 30's. I don't always spend money when I go out and if I do have to spend its usually on cheap public transit to get somewhere else. I often leave the house and just walk around town. Good exercise and I'm not always stuck at home driving my cat bonkers.
If you buy the ones with paid dlc/season passes/microtransactions, yes. You have to use your powers of observation and critical thinking and buy the complete games instead.
Some are, and some aren't. 100 dollars with bg3 gets you 100 plus hours of enjoyment. That is 1 dollar / hour. That is value. I am still playing Skyrim after 10+ years and it was 60 bucks. I have 1000+ hours in it. Worth.
I don't go out because post covid everything costs 100% more and is 100% worse.
I spend $60 on two beers and a mcdonalds quality hamburger + fries last week. F that. in 2019 that would have been 20 bucks. in a place that was crowded and it took me like 30m to get my food. and almost every place is like that now. double the price for half the service or quality of product.
if going out was fun and affordable I'd do it more. I went out regularly before covid. I just don't want to have to drop 30-40 bucks for a single beer and junk food meal anytime i want to socialize.
all my old spots that were affordable, chill and fun, are gone. i used to hang out in coffee shops after work because they were quiet and i don't drink.. now they all closed at 2pm. bars are noisy and crowded and want $15+ for a cocktail and $10 for a budweiser. that used to be $10 and $5.
Dude even stuff like bowling is too much now. An hour for two people can approach $70 at certain places. Not the bougie places either, those places are even more. I was browsing Google reviews for one place nearby like that and the owner responded saying that they should look for a Groupon.
yeah i'm not even counting tipping. that shit is insane. lots of places in my city now want a 20% tip, and a 5-10% fee. on top of a 9% tax. So basically your meal is now 35-40% more than the prices in the menu. and it's expect at literally every joint now, take out and coffee joints too.
it's just not worth it. for that kind of pricing I'm better off just getting delivery. which is what i do now. ubereats is a 20% tip and like a $5 delivery fee. it's cheaper and i don't have to deal with slow/rude service and other customers being loud and obnoxious.
We did not get into over tipping to help people who are working. Tipping popped up everywhere because it's profitable for POS terminal operators and business owners. It wasn't something society decided on, most people complain about it. It was brought about suddenly when the POS terminals changed, mainly from Square Cash, but everyone else followed suit.
Depends on where you are and what you want. In Texas, you can get a beer in a small bar for $4-5, especially during happy hour. Hard to find a burger delivered to your table for less than $10. Fries and non-alcoholic beverages have become surprisingly expensive. Fries can easily be $5-7. Restaurants have gone over the top on portions - half pound burger on a giant bun and a bucket of fries for $20. They sell more, charge more, and half of it goes to the trash.
Not young anymore, but when I see the price of live music, alcohol, etc, and combine that with things like student debt, low income jobs and the pressure of potentially being humiliated via social media, I wonder how on earth young people ever go out.
I feel incredibly lucky to have been in my late teens/early 20s during the late 90s and early 2000s. I suspect a lot of my generation dodged a fair few bullets, and never even realised it at the time.
my work hires lots of 22 year olds. most of them are getting an extra 1-2K from the bank of mom and dad per month, and loading up on debt. i've seen their statements that they download onto their work computers. kid making 40K a year has 15K in CC debt. (of course this same kid got fired because they were doing personal shit on a work computer).
poor kids live at home with their folks to have any semblence of a life.
It's funny how much this varies from family to family. We never eat dinner before 9PM. Usually two meals per day, lunch at maybe 1PM and dinner between 9 and 10PM.
We're just doing desk-work though, so no extra calorie needs. If I'm doing physical stuff I'll usually add a light breakfast.
At least for me, its a threshold problem. The internet means that staying at home is always going to be at least somewhat interesting, which makes it a lot harder to take a gamble on a random late night outing. It’s not just staying out late, either—Gen Z shows declines in a whole host of risky behaviors. Smoking, alcohol, drug use, teen pregnancy, are all way down in our generation. In some sense, we’ve found a drug that we prefer to actual drugs.
I have two 15 years old sons. One of them is never home. He is always going out with his friends, either to the gym, or just walking around town. The other one rarely leaves the house. He'll invite his friends over to hang out, and sometimes he visits them, but they usually talk at school or online.
One difference I noticed is that back in the 1900s, we had to get a ride from our parents in order to play video games with our friends, but thanks to the Internet, it's very easy to play and socialize with your friends from home, and being in the same room now PREVENTS people from playing together.
The kids are actually socializing MORE because they don't need to meet at the same location, and I don't have to drive their asses all over town, so I'm ok with that.
The 1950s are part of the 1900s.. same as 1850 was part of the 1800s. They were just being facetious using "1900s" anyway. That will change as we all get older though, eventually it will just be the 1900s.
I'm in my 40s, I'm not gonna go out to a concert an hour away on a weeknight because that means I'm not getting home 'til after 1 and I have to be up in the morning with a functioning brain because I have a damn job.
I'm 46. I took a half-day off last time I went to an event an hour away so I could sleep in the next day. It's the only way I can do it and I do it rarely because I don't have much PTO.
I don't know about your location specifically or the specific age range you're refering to, but at least where I am, school/college tends to start at like 8:00 am, and most students want to or need to work fairly busy jobs given the ongoing cost of living crisis. Considering that, it means they can't stay up late, and don't have much energy to socialize compared to older generations. Although again, this varys by area and individual.
I should have mentioned that the kids are 30ish. In the US, Texas. We all work generally 8-5 jobs and my husband is the only one who drives more than 20 minutes to work. He's almost an hour each way- maybe that's why we tend to go out later - come home, love on the animals, have a drink, go to dinner.
I’m nearly 30. When it comes to family dinners, I want to eat earlier because I need time to unwind after the dinner. I want to get home by 9 so I have time to wind down before bed. I’m very introverted, and even though I get along well with both my family and my in-laws it’s still tiring to be around them. The only person who doesn’t wear me out is my husband, so I feel the same about hanging out with friends.
I'm in my 30s and with constant stress of life, I have no interest in really doing much of anything besides sitting on my couch playing video games and forgeting everything in my down time.
I used to go out and party every weekend and during the week, but that was my early 20s.
I'm 29. Wife and I go out for food 4 times a week. Also to do things to get out of the house. But, I make software engineer money and we live in a relatively small city in Wisconsin. I bought my house at 27 and own a sports car.
I know shit is rough for a lot of people and inflation is nuts. I don't take my career for granted.
EDIT: Oh yeah, probably a good thing to note: no kids, we're both sterilized. Not our thing.
yes. nightlight in my city is predominantly wealthy people going out every other night. i go out like a few times a month and people think i'm a weirdo/shut in. i used to go out more, but it was way cheaper to go out back then.
i can't be dropping $500 in drinks alone every week. but for a lot of people in my city that's entirely normal.
There's plenty of fancy nightlife here, but i really love going to a dive bar with a local band! Most of our nearby colleges have drama programs and sometimes we find free late night programs at museums.
Yeah that's a bit much lol. I don't drink at all really but I do try to spend pretty reasonably. Ideally a night out for both of us will cost less than 80-100.
I am a young person and I only leave the house to go to work, but I am currently looking for a wfh job. There's nothing really interesting outside and the weather is rarely nice. If there were less roads and stores and more parks or places you could just exist in then I probably would go outside more, but that would be during the day and not at night. Usually during the evening I just lay around and relax. I am so tired and stressed from the day that I never feel like doing anything when I get home.
Your kids aren't kids and probably understand the value of a good night's sleep in order to work the next day?
I generally don't go out on week nights especially not late because I want to get at least 7-8 hours of sleep or I'm a grumpy unproductive mess. My evenings I'm making dinner, getting ready for the next day, and trying to find an hour or two to relax before doing it all over again
I don't know I hate going out any more. I quit drinking, me and my girlfriend like so smoke a bong eat dinner cuddle with he cats and go to bed early (9pm) to wake up for work (5:30a), but if a band I like is playing the next city over on a week night the music lover in me makes me go. I'm 36 and it's the only thing that I get excited to go out and do any more, not that's it's a super frequent thing.
Super reasonable! I'm not out until 2 every night, but I was excited to go see some great live music and we were home by 1230. My kids rarely drink - they learned lessons in their 20s that i didn't learn until my 40s. I've shifted more towards cannabis, especially during the week - better sleep and no hangover.
My kids are 30ish. If he's sneaking out, his punishment comes from his wife, which i suspect is more effective than any grounding he got from us. 😁
Niece's and nephews are late 30s-mid 40s. The older ones seem more likely to go out later and stay someplace longer drinking and chatting than the younger ones.
Oh, they are full grown adults. During the week, they are grinding at work. Sometimes they just want to come home and reset with their own family (wife, kids, games, catch up on shows, whatever). Not sure what their commute or work is like, but I can definitely see dipping out on random family events early or just not going out completely. Especially during working days.
I think you just need to plan it better. Maybe schedule family dinner and events on the weekends.
I don't think you deserve the negative reaction you're getting. I think it just hit a nerve with some people. There does seem to be more depression in younger people and lethargy is a symptom of that.
Covid isn't a factor for me anymore, I keep up with my shots. It's financial reasons and time restraints mostly. I got too much shit to do to have any sort of fun. My off days is catching up on sleep debt and errands. Speaking of which I need to do right now.
My kids, the teenagers, definitely do not go out like I did - it's not money, most of what we did back then was just drink in empty parking lots, go to garage punk shows, concerts when we could. Sometimes the beach at night too. We had no money. They do similar (much less drinking, more of a police state now) but way, way less often and not usually till late.
The older set, 25-31, it varies. Some eat at civilized 8-9pm when they do go out. Some like to go at teatime then just go home.
The husband and I, we do usually go out to eat at teatime but sometimes go out for a drink, literally one, or to a concert or show.
Every single one of us, adults and teens, like outdoor concerts because they have to end by 11, noise ordinance. Or concerts at clubs that wrap them early to open afterwards as a dance club. Nobody likes staying up till 3am at a show anymore, but maybe nobody actually liked it in the first place?
Agree with everything you say except the final point - I absolutely LOVED being out clubbing until 3 (4, 5...)
Maybe it was just a product of my time as a young person, but being out that late and having a great time long after most people were asleep just felt so fundamental to my young adulthood.
That's not a criticism of those who prefer to stop sooner though, just a statement of how doing so would have felt alien to me. Each to their own though, as always.
The only time I really liked it was working swing shift. It was so wonderful to get out of work around midnight but still be able to catch some live music or even just sit at a bar on my walk home, have a couple of drinks. A lot like having the coffeeshop on my way into my day job now, it connects you to the community, and made the later work WAY more tolerable.
I will still go out to see a favorite band any day of the week, of course. But that calculation is very different now because I feel so much better with consistent sleep 11-7 every night, and do have a pretty demanding day job, kids, whole big life now.
I agree with that. The best thing to come from the early-ending shows is less waiting. Remember the old days of standing for an hour between bands and the headliner started at midnight?
If we have a show or something we eat early, or sometimes go to happy hour and eat there. Normally, we come home, talk to the animals, have a drink, and decide what to eat. We have an agreement that if we say NO to 5 restaurants, we're having for tacos. All of that usually occurs between 6 and 7 with dinner around 8ish.
This year I've been going out more than ever. COVID gave me a new appreciation for out-of-the-house activities and now I can't get enough of them.
Ironically, I met my current IRL social circle on discord during the pandemic. Most people in my old social circle started having kids over the last few years so I don't really spend as much time with them anymore.
I blame video games! No, seriously. During COViD, my kids leaned on video games as their only social outlet - everything is online and they’re generally chatting the whole time. We stopped limiting their gaming time because that was their socializing time.
Since COViD and work from home, I don’t go out anywhere nearly as much. It’s too much hassle
My ex moved to a new town and my younger kid (high school) is very active so spent the summer exploring the town. He’d spend entire days walking around, and never found “where the high school kids hang out”, I don’t think they do (outside the house)
My older kid spend all his money on the “occasional” Dunks. Even coffee drinks have gotten so much more expensive
Okay, but, video games aren't the problem here, they were a solution to the problem; so I'm not sure how they're to blame.
They couldn't go outside (stay at home orders), couldn't really play around outside with friends (social distancing at least), and didn't really have options to simply hang out with friends, at all, ever. Many schools were doing remote learning too. So they spent all day, every day, physically alone.
So they played games with their friends, so they could chat, emote and dance at eachother in the game, goof off if they wanted (within the limits of the game), and work together or against eachother to achieve goals or whatever the purpose of the game was.
It seems video games were not the problem, but rather the solution to a litany of issues during the pandemic. On top of all of that, they didn't have to beg for money to go to the shops or movies or whatever.... Which is a benefit not only to the kids, who rely on their parents approval to do those things and provide them with the required funds to participate, but also on the parents pocket book. Overall a win/win.
On top of that, they don't need to worry about curfews, or any danger from strangers, or bullies battering them. If they don't want to associate with someone they can simply not team up with groups that include that person. They can jump into public groups if their friends are busy and make new friends. Literally the only sacrifice they make is that they're not going outside or getting much exercise.
The potential for device-driven entertainment right at home is so much greater now than it was for prior generations. It’s not just social media but also games. Kids these days hang out on Discord while playing a game together.
I would say from personal experience it's nice to have an evening to myself after events. I've stayed out late playing shows at bars in my early 20s while working a full time job and it is a godsend to have time that isn't for sleeping to spend my own way. Again, this is my own personal experience not everyone yearns for that introversion time.
Young people can't do anything these days without their emotional support ferrets or without their phones clutched in their hands so they can ask the internet what to think. Also fresh air and green grass is somehow scary to them, as is any kind of social interaction. They also can't take any responsibility for anything or else they experience PTSD or some other debilitating mental trauma.
The children now love luxury; they have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are now tyrants, not the servants of their households. They no longer rise when elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize their teachers.