Which competition would be the easiest or most likely one for a regular person/you to (1) make into the Olympics and (2) actually be competitive?

Curling, if we count Winter Olympics as well. Quite a few of the athletes look not nearly as athletic as in other disciplines, and I dare say I can whip up some vicious mopping.

My respect for curling was greatly increased when I walked into a room where it was showing on TV, and they were smoking (don't smoke, kids) and someone was having a sandwich.

I asked if they had won and were allowed to celebrate right there on the ice?

My mate said, "Nah. They're still competing right now."

I don't know if my mate was messing with me, or what.

But I want to believe. An Olympian who doesn't let competing interfere with a good sandwich... Is one who has my eternal respect.
It's the actual curling you've got to get good at, shuffleboard in steroids

I am equally unlikely to win against olympians in all olympic events.

Olympians are a lifestyle that starts from a young age in almost every case. They are generally poor/supported by their family. They usually don't do anything that is social in time or food constraints. I'm not saying they never have fun or do anything, but am saying their eating and sleep patterns generally come first. The 4 time Olympic velodrome racer I worked with in the bike shops, came to work looking like a tupperware salesman. He never ate full meals like most people. He nibbled on stuff all day long, just a bite here and there, and always healthy stuff he made. When we did group rides, he was enormous, but never showed off, sprinted, or pushed at all. He would tell you that it was not part of his schedule routine to do so. Track riders are the big guys. I'm the same build as him and I was intimidating in a kit back then, but I looked like batman standing next to the Hulk with him. He was awesome to work with, but really struggled with the desire to have a life and family against the absolute commitment of riding.

One of the fit coaches at the first bike shop I worked at used to say that the world cycling track record for the hour distance was accessible to beat. The record has been beat by someone with a higher average cadence than the previous person since something like the 1970's. That level of cycling is really all about pain and the mental battle. Targeting average cadence would yield a simple enough target to focus on even when your brain is at something like 2% functionality from blood oxygen deprivation. I'm an idiot in just a 30 minute crit when I'm at like 5% function. I can't imagine figuring out how circles work at 2%, but maybe someone else can.

At our gym we have a "rower drag racing" leaderboard.

Something about my size, fitness level and physiology just slots me in as one of the top 5. I can crank out a KM in a REALLY good time despite not being super strong or fit and then collapse onto the floor damn near dying for the next 15 minutes.

In shorter distances the stronger guys bury me, over longer distances my endurance gives out. But at a KM I can give it 100% the whole time and hit my wall right on the mark.

None, you are competing with other humans.

If it is easy for you to compete, it is easy for them too.

And the olympics is the top of the top. So you will have the biggest competers all together.

That said, I've seen a lot of dad bods on Curling. That is more about precision than having perfectly toned muscles.

I have been shooting my whole life. I was on the rifle team and shot skeet and trap in high school and college so that would probably be the easiest. I would still need a shitload of practice but I bet I could do it if I had the time to shoot a few thousand rounds first. Rifles or shotguns that is, I can't shoot pistols to save my ass.

Even as someone who hasnt done a lot of shooting, I feel like shooting and archery would be your average persons best bet. Most olymic sports require year after year of conditioning to be competitive, as well as the skills work and team training.

Shooting and archery is almost totally skills work and no team training. I think if you won the lottery and could just afford to hire coaches full time and live at the range you could probably go from unskilled to olympic hopeful in 4 years.
- For rifles and pistols, I think the only thing I couldn't teach you is the eyes. If you can't see shit, you can't hit shit, and some people just can't work out how to use their dominant eye.
  
  Trap and Skeet are the same but a little trickier, what with the clays moving around and having to lead targets. I know guys that have been shooting birds their whole life that can't shoot trap for shit lol
  
  I can't speak to archery I never got into it. All my shooting stemmed from hunting and we never bow hunted.
  
  Shooting a rifle off-hand is a little tricky if you can't control your breathing, but otherwise, I agree shooting sports is probably the easiest entry level if you have the money for ammo and the time to do nothing but shoot.

According to a documentary I once saw: bobsled in a Caribbean nation

Feel the rhythm. Feel the rhyme.

I mean, I’m sure you could bribe your way into the Russian basketball team as a substitute that never plays

This person made it to the Olympics just by being persistent. I really wish more people like her competed to show how good the good people really are to compare a non freak of nature.

https://gearjunkie.com/winter/skiing/elizabeth-swaney-olympics-hungary-ski

She's a bad ass for just having the guts to go out there like that. Good for her! I'd be mortified to try that...
- The event she participated in would scare the fuck out of me.

Maybe equestrian racing. Buy an already trained horse and then it mostly knows what to do. And there’s like 50 plus competitors.

Its gotta be handball or field hockey. You don't have to be the best person, just among the best.

Was watching Denmark v. France last week. France got a penalty, and Denmark subbed in a very rotund goalkeeper for the penalty, then Immediately subbed him back out.

So, just get hella chonky and go join your country's handball team.

Real talk, I wish Handball was more widely played in the US. I have the right build and good hand-eye coordination for (non-goalie) Handball.

Is the luge still an Olympic sport? If so, I'd probably say that's the easiest to get into. I'm sure there's actually a lot of technique and nuance to it, but it really does look like you just kinda ride on a really dope sled.

You've also got to feel the rhythm and feel the rhyme
- That's bobsled. The luge is much smaller and scarier. I would imagine the risk of death is much higher in luge than bobsled, but much lower than skeleton.

Rowing cox. No athletic prowess or skill required. Only requirement is to be physically small and do a bit of coaching.

I would tank any of them but have enough dance training that if I had to compete in 2028 I would train for ballroom dance. Nothing else. Then go and dance and lose. Like, that's the event I am closest to being able to do and still a million miles away from being competitive in it.

In terms of skill set of average person? It would probably be easiest to lose the 100m dash because you could jog it.

Rugby Sevens most likely. The US Women's team had people on it who had never played rugby 4 years ago. Granted they had an (American) football background. Handball might be in there. It's gotta be a sport that isn't very popular.

Rock, Paper, Scissors

Drunk darts.

Can't hit a bullseye sober; can't miss it boozed.

I though they were going to do gaming?

Olympic pushmowing on uneven terrain with lots of rocks and roots where it's not regular grass but super wet stuff that never dries, viney things that bind up the mower, and weird plants I can't identify (or maybe some kind of lichen sort of thing?). I definitely spend enough time practicing it. Can't wait to shade a lot out with the orchard I'm planting and replace others with better (largely edible) plants and better ground cover.

Procrastination.

"I was gonna go, but I figured I'd submit my application tomorrow."

Wins gold.

Boxing I think could be one of the easiest. Only problem being you will get punched in the face.

Masturbation

I believe you'd come first
- Don't underestimate yourself, with practice and dedication you too can shoot for gold

I don't follow the olympics but if they do competitive masturbation then definitely that.

Any sport in the Athletics category

I consider myself average as a runner but I couldn't sprint 200m as fast as the walkers walk a full 20km. The speed of the athletes at the games is mind blowing.
- I know athletics tend to depend on body capabilities and training but I perceived the question to be which competition would be the "easiest" and I suppose I perceived "easy" to mean "don't need that many rules and steps". I find athletics to be one of the more simpler games out there. I apologize if I may have misinterpreted the question.