Look at all the cute kids!

Can I claim my "babies" as dependents on my taxes, hypothetically?

Yes, however, if you or your partner menstruates, it's manslaughter.
- Is it only the eggs that count as babies or sperm as well?
  If they do then I may be one of the biggest mass murderers in history
If you can find a way to oppress women with the rebate, you'll have their support.

Up next: Alabama now arguing they should have 4,000 electoral votes.

So most eggs are unfertilized embryos, which in mammals is what happens during menstruation. That said, it's not even a stretch at this point to think that conservatives might start saying that menstruation is immoral or whatever for this same reason.

Might?
unfertilized embryos

What are you talking about? "Unfertilised embryo" is an oxymoron. An unfertilised egg isn't an embryo

Embryo (noun)

an unborn or unhatched offspring in the process of development, in particular a human offspring during the period from approximately the second to the eighth week after fertilization (after which it is usually termed a fetus).

But I agree with the fact conservatives really do not care and would ban menstruation if possible.
Menstruation is not the result of an unfertilized egg though. It's there to waste potentially unhealthy embryo's and make conception less likely to succeed. The egg is gone before menstuation occurs.
- It's there to waste potentially unhealthy embryo's
  
  Ah, so it is murder, according to Alabama law...

The GOP would never agree to the parallel because the brown ones cost more.

Nah. Most conservatives I know are in support of the for profit prison system. They need eggs of all colors to grow up poor, uneducated and limited choice but to commit crimes.
They probably only cost more because that money goes to Big Egg while they get minimum yolk.
- The brown ones cost more to raise due to their inherent behavior and lack of rooster figure.

i hate my state so fucking much

If it makes you feel any better, you're not the only one that hates their state, over the laws and regulations after the overturning of Roe V. Wade.

"Behold, a chicken!"

--Diogenes, probably.

“Get out of my fucking barrel you filthy pleb” - Diogenes

I guess I'll go eat some scrambled children (by Alabama's definition)

Unfortunately you are going to need to eat a lot. Chicken eggs are usually not fertilized and therefore could never become a life. They breed chickens separately. So if chicken were humans, the cartons of eggs at the store would not be considered children in Alabama.
- They just determined that unfertilized eggs are children. By their logic, I'm eating chicken. I just made it ridiculous to show the massive flaw in their logic.
  
  "Behold, a man"

What I don’t understand is; do all girls/women receive child payments from birth to ~60

If they have a period are they liable for murder?

Wait a minute Are you telling me that Alabama thinks that unfertilized eggs are viable humans? or is OP and everybody in this comment section just being extra silly to mock Alabama's latest anti-abortion shenanigans?
- technically, if one were to follow the logic of the ruling they are mocking, yes, Alabama believe that

People mad alabama saying the truth :(

internet try not to make the obligatory low-effort jokes 0.0056ms after yet more precedent for women’s rights being stripped is established. (hard, impossible, sex ed is for normies, we’re not even going to try let’s be honest.)

Everyone remember: The last thing you want to do in a memes community is try to be funny.
- i just think comparing human women to chickens (adjacently) is gross but clearly i am in the minority so ill let it be :)

Memes are great and all, but we need to not spread misinformation. It's fertilized eggs specifically that have been called children. Reproductive rights are important, but any time shit gets misconstrued, it's a chance to be attacked by the right.

Do you live under a rock? The right is going to attack no matter what whether the arguments are correct or not. They don't care about substance, they only care about aesthetics.

"A chance" lmao. Welcome to politics 2024.
- (again, OP post is a cheap joke but,)
  
  Disinformation is not just about the 'right' attacking, it's also about disenfranchising the 'left'. I'm amazed how many times on Reddit I see something that hits the spot of "that's truly awful" together with "maybe it's actually true that way", so I check the source and it's not at all like that. Now I'm used to it and assume all Reddit/Lemmy political outrage is at least partially misinformation.
  
  (Anyway I don't aim to learn my politics from Lemmy or Reddit.)
  
  More deeply, do you want a world where lying makes your side win? Or a world where people are honest and willing to learn from the truth? Defending ourselves with dishonesty is cruel to people around us, damages our society, and ultimately undermines ourselves.
  
  Sorry for the rant here, it's been stewing in me a long time, and will continue to every time I see lies in support of something I care about, or from people I care about.
Do you mean to tell me the egg section of the local Alabama supermarket is not, in fact, an orphanage?

Fucking misinformation gets me every time.
- I am not getting it. It's there any visual aids?
Doesn't really matter because I can see what direction they're going. This started off being about abortion of a fetus with Roe being overturned. Now we're talking about embryos and fertilization. The egg and sperm are only one more step away.

The act of creating that embryo could be the next thing they put into law. I could see the religious extremists wanting sex outside of marriage to be illegal. That sounds crazy to me, but again, that's what direction this argument is going.
- Masturbation will soon be genocide
- Yeah I get that. I'm gay. They talk about making "sodomy" illegal again. But any time that people take things to extremes that are not true it hurts the people making the correct arguments.
There are some fertilized chicken eggs on the market, but most factory farmed are not. This note is for all the folks that didn't get a proper biology teacher.
Every single one of those eggs was the loving product of a cock and a chick.
- No they weren't.
- Ehhhh no? You don’t need a rooster for chickens to lay eggs, AFAIK.
- I know you live in Indiana. There are chicken farms near you. They shred 99.9999% of the males because they aren't needed for egg production. The roosters are only needed to fertilize the next generation of chickens, which roughly 50% of them will be immediately killed at birth.
  
  Edit: ok you're trolling. I was wondering, cause normally you're more educated than that take is.
- This. Even if you do take everything seriously and use proper terminology, the far right will find a way to troll you. Don't let it shape your reality. Acknowledge them for the unproductive trolls they are and carry on with your business without a second thought.