is feeling disrespected reason good enough to change jobs?
people do not quit jobs, they quit managers and I personally would like to quit some coworkers.
Basically the manager says in public that I'm good and passionate about the job but privately she writes the opposite. She never talked to me about what I need to improve, if anything. And then has the gall to tell me to trust her if I want to open up to her. Two faced, not to trust.
I only found out when another manager read to me what she wrote about me.
I was never good at playing office politics. FWIW I don't like the job, I do it because I need money and I'm good at it.
Do you think this person will sign off on raises or promotions, or any other benefits?
Dump them. In your exit interview say, "manager has declined to comment on my performance, but has shared criticisms with other people. Understanding and improving the quality of my work is important, and I do not believe I am able to do that when facts are concealed from me."
If your manager is telling you that you are doing a good job and has no notes on your performance, but telling the higher-ups at the company or other management level employees something other than exactly that, it's no longer an issue of respect at that point. Your work environment is toxic.
Start seeking other positions. Take your time and interview carefully - remember to ask good questions that will help you get an idea of whether or not it would be a place that you can enjoy working at, or at the very least tolerate on a day-to-day basis.
If they ask you why you are quitting, wait until your exit interview to spill any details about your manager going behind your back. Do not accept counter-offers for continued employment (retaliation is very likely if you do stay) and don't bother trying to hash out any grievances with the person conducting your exit interview (their promises are almost never backed up by action, just hot air to get you to stay and trap you where you are). Walk in there confident knowing that you committed to changing jobs over this.
Agreed. There are really only two reasons managers do that. Either they want to deny raises or they want to fire you. Both need a paper trail, and neither is affected by what they say to coworkers. Either way it's time to interview with other companies.
Work relationships are built on trust. This is a rough time to be looking for work, but in your case please consider finding another job and only then quitting this one.
I peaced out of a job almost 2 years ago, something very toxic as well, and I'm 100% better for it. I hope you can find an environment that's better for you.
Comments like yours remind me why I’m so damn lucky and grateful for my job…
In February I’ll have been there 10 years, and my salary is almost 150% more than when I started (which was above $50k for context).
I’ve gotten annual ~3% “raises” each year, as well as one role change (+11%), two promotions (+25% and +13%), and a raise I pushed for (+12%). The first promotion, my boss literally called me on a Tuesday and said I had a new title and my raise was effective as of the Saturday before.
I share this to remind people these kinds of companies do exist, even if they’re the exception.
I'm not saying you're wrong, but I got a >100% in 3 years from a >50k by switching companies. That being said I don't think I would change my current job for a different one, if I ever get made a significantly higher offer elsewhere I'm more likely to use it as leverage to get a similar raise here, so I can definitely understand the not wanting to leave a given company.
I'm glad you're happy but I got similar results in half the time. I went from 40k, to 70, then 80, then 120, and finally 135 now in about 6 years. Of those each time I got a new job, except for 70 to 80 which was when I went from contracting to full time at the same job. Hell, I asked my manager at that job how I could get a raise and he said my best bet was to quit, go work somewhere else and come back in a few years. My number one piece of career advice I give everyone is "quit your job" especially if you work corporate
It's a two-way street my friends. That evil employer paid you to gain experience and stack your resume. Wake the fuck up. Your labor is worth more than your take home pay. Take the money and run.
When my buddies and I moved to Florida, my guy went from a managerial position at a cable contractor to changing oil at Jiffy Lube. Every 6-months or so he'd hop up. In a few years he was making 6-digits.
Personally I'd find another job first. Once that is secure I'd plan my exit.
If your company does exit interviews I'd be frank and honest about your reasons for leaving. Consider having a quick outline prepared of what you want to tell them. I don't burn bridges on my way out when possible, but if you can articulate your problems well it might help the next person.
Bullshit. I've quit jobs before. like the job I had at a veneer mill. It was boring me to tears, was so loud that ear-pro was mandatory--about 110dB, IIRC--and I was spending about an hour each day digging splinters out of my hands. (Couldn't wear gloves b/c they didn't have the dexterity needed for picking up a single sheet of veneer without breaking it.) I don't think I even saw my manager more than a few times in the brief period i worked there.
Doesn't that entirely depend on your perspective for the future? Can you find a better workplace and is your situation going to improve? Then yes, do it. Is it going to stay the same, or you take a massive hit considering salary or something? Then have a good think what's more important to you...
it is always the people that make any job worth doing.
I found out a manager was doing exactly what you described and it was my last day. you might want to make it yours too even if you need to hang around long enough to line something else up, just check out and don't give them any indication.
I've had enough bad managers in my time to know you need enough savings to walk away immediately if they try to fuck with you.
You don't need permission from the internet, if you're asking the question you already know the answer.
You said it yourself; people change managers, not jobs.
So you’ve established that continuing to work for this manager is undesirable on multiple levels. Does that other manager want you to come and work for them? Would you want to? Line something up either inside our outside the company so that you no longer have to work for that manager; I suspect your current manager will be gone within a year if another manager was already talking to you about your file.
Absolutely. Always be open to changing jobs if you need to, and always keep that option as a back up plan even if things are going well. Know that if you find a new job it may fix some things while introducing new problems, there is always some risk to doing so. If you aren't in a rush to get out try to line something up that makes the change worthwhile - get a promotion out of it, or at least some pay raise or other benefit. Often times annual raises suck enough that many people need to get a new job to find a decent pay bump anyway, so it's good to be looking for that. If you haven't interviewed in awhile line a few up as practice too, so when you find something you're more serious about it will go smoothly.
Make them fire you. I've done it that way loads of times when dissatisfied in a workplace. There's nothing quite like being fired and out of work to make you get your shit together and find something else. Also, make a plan to become self-employed if you can. Having been fired loads of times I now work for myself and it was the best move I ever made. I no longer have to deal with asshole mangers any more and if there's someone you dislike and don't want to work for, you can either not take on the job or over-quote on the costs to get rid of them. Sometimes they're stupid enough to agree to those costs, so then you at least feel satisfied about working for an asshole.
Satisfaction at making your asshole boss do something that he/she clearly didn't want to do. Satisfaction that you made it as awkward as possible for them. You can also play the game of threatening to take them to an industrial tribunal for harassment. They might even give you a financial incentive to go peacefully. It worked for me on a couple of occasions and the bastards deserved it.
I'm sure it varies by state, but in the US, you cannot collect unemployment if you quit, but you can if you were fired (and the company doesn't decide to fight your claim).