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Reyali @lemm.ee
Posts 2
Comments 166
What would 10 year old you be the most surprised about you now?
  • What age do you start remembering what you were like?

    I became really self-aware at 11. I’m guessing a bit about being 10, but 6th grade (11-12) is when I feel like I started being the person I still am 20+ years later. Obviously I’ve grown, but it started then.

  • What would 10 year old you be the most surprised about you now?
  • Probably that I’m alive?

    I already dealt with (undiagnosed) chronic depression by 10. The first time I thought about killing myself I don’t think I even knew the word “suicide.” I also had an overwhelming sense that I wouldn’t live past 30. That might not have started until I was 11 or 12, but I think it was there when I was younger.

    Weirdly my mom also had an overwhelming sense that she would lose me at a young age from the day I was born, which she didn’t have with my older sister.

    Well, I’m past 30 now. My love of people in my life has kept the suicidal ideation to only that. While I still have chronic depression, I’ve learned to manage it better over the years and medication helps.

    I genuinely don’t know why I was depressed or had suicidal thoughts that young. I didn’t have a traumatic home or childhood. My parents worked a lot but loved me and my sister without question. We didn’t have a lot of money but always had enough food. I loved school and had great teachers. I wasn’t sexually assaulted before I was 10 (I think I was 12 the first time). I don’t know and that bothers me.

    ETA: I guess I was bullied at school by 10, so maybe that accounts for it?

  • Florida liberal arts college reinstates ‘wokeness’ course amid furore
  • A dear friend of mine went there as well. He was the first trans person I knew, almost 20 years ago now, and I know he loved New College and the support he got through his transition there.

    As hard as it is to see this for me, I expect it’s heartbreaking for him, and that makes me sad.

  • I would personally just treat whatever direction I'm facing at the time as North and go from there.
  • At one point in my childhood, my dad made the comment, “Women don’t know compass directions.” I took offense to that and made a point to learn them to prove him wrong.

    I felt vindicated in high school when he was coming to pick me up from a friend’s house and said, “I’m at the gas station. Do I go left or right?” I told him there were several gas stations on the way, and asked which direction he was facing to figure out which one he was by. He couldn’t tell me and finally hung up on me in a huff.

  • I have to say goodbye to my best friend tomorrow
  • I put down my best friend of 20 years on October 5th and fuck it’s hard. I’m sorry. You know you’re making the caring decision and loving your dog until the end though, and that is a gift.

    It’s going to be hard. I’m starting to feel like myself again between the moments of deep grief, but I am still fragile and sad and will be for a long time.

    If you ever need comfort from a stranger, feel free to save my name or comment and shoot me a message.

  • How do you know you aren't smart?
  • I was fortunate that individuals in my elementary school actually made accommodations for me being ahead of average. My third grade teacher gave me a fourth grade math book and special assignments from it. The pull-out classes for smart kids were K-2 and 3-5, but I got put in the 3-5 class in second grade. My principal supported my parents in moving me to a different class because of teachers who weren’t supporting me (multiple times, actually).

    My school was in a pretty low-income district, but I completely lucked out with educators (and parents) who fought for me.

    Definitely still ended up on the gifted child > burnt out teen/adult who struggles with some basic life skills, but at least I didn’t end up struggling with my ADHD in school until high school because of the support in my younger years.

  • What do people that are for the first time moving to a place where is snows need to know?
  • Many people mentioned clearing ALL the snow off your car, but I didn’t see people mentioning why. Here are some videos to elaborate how terrifying and dangerous it can be when people don’t do that.

    One, two, three, four

    It takes a lot of energy to clear the car off, but it’s critical. Don’t be the person that harms someone else just to save a bit of time and effort.

  • Elon's Death Machine (aka Tesla) Mows Down Deer at Full Speed , Keeps Going on "Autopilot"
  • Wait, are you saying that Virginia not mentioning what to do if a moose is in the road is “bad”?

    Considering that the northern-most part of Virginia is still about 350 mi south of the closest range of moose, it would be pointless if not absurd for them to include it.

  • Has anybody ever made it extremely obvious to you that you're neurodivergent?
  • I’ve definitely talked about ND behaviors within minutes of meeting strangers at parties (either they bring it up or I do about myself, never calling someone else out for it).

    I’m a nerd, therefore most of my friends are nerds, and so too are their friends. While I don’t have data to back this up, I believe most nerds are ND (I literally can’t think of any NT folks in my social circle). We tend to be good at pattern recognition, so identifying similar traits when there’s already the confirmation of being friends-of-friends tends to be enough to get into such topics, lol.

  • Does your cat let you sleep/nap not facing them?
  • Thank you <3

    She was the best! My soul pet. I had her for over half my life since she was 4 months old. We had a great life together and I’m so grateful for that, even though losing her leaves a gaping hole in my heart.

  • Does your cat let you sleep/nap not facing them?
  • Thank you. I’m sorry you’re also caring for an aging pet. It’s hard but they are so, so worth it! Love her and her howls. Try to get pictures and videos of her! And give her an extra head kiss or scritch or whatever she likes best from me, please!

  • Does your cat let you sleep/nap not facing them?
  • My 20-year-old baby girl insisted I face her as well. She would paw at the back of my head until I rolled over or moved her in front of me. She only started doing that over the past two years or so, but for about five years she would paw at me to lift the covers so she could snuggle under them or to hold her in my arms.

    I had to put her to sleep just over two weeks ago on October 5. I miss her waking me up all the time for snuggles. I would trade every night of solid sleep in the world to have her with me still.

  • 'This reeks of desperation': Internet mocks 'Donald McDonald' for fast food campaign stunt
  • Nah, he just saw the guy shake them midway through to keep them from sticking and retained the info that you shake them so they don’t stick, then ignored everything else the guy said.

    Do you really think Trump has ever done that kind of work before? Trust fund babies aren’t exactly known for scraping by with food service jobs.

  • 'This reeks of desperation': Internet mocks 'Donald McDonald' for fast food campaign stunt
  • Even worse than putting it on the hanger—which I could excuse as a first-timer mistake—he was told like 5 times that you don’t need to shake them when they’re done cooking, you just drain them. He took some out and shook, and the trainer corrected him and showed him again how to drain them, then just 10 seconds later Trump is shaking another basket and dumps it out without draining it.

  • The 1900s
  • With one parent who turned 80 this year and the second in their late 70s, I’ve realized there’s a difference between “elderly” and “old.” A lot of people equate the two. I think “old” always started in one’s 70s to me, even as a kid. “Elderly,” however, is not based on a number but on a physical state of being.

    My dad is elderly. He’s frail and struggling to move around much. It’s hard to watch and it’s been going on and worsening for a few years now. My mom, despite being only 3 years younger, is not at all elderly. She has more energy and vivacity than many people over 20 years her junior (hell I’m in my 30s and she can do loops around me, but I got the chronic illness genes that she didn’t have). Technically, she’s old. But no one who knows her would think of her as “elderly.”

  • This is a thought experiment "Ball on a Table" for detecting whether someone has Aphantasia. What do you see when you perform this experiment?
  • If I think of tasting a lime, my mouth puckers and salivates like I’m about to eat something sour. I could probably say I’m imagining the taste, similar to how you described, like a 1/10.

    I think hearing is maybe like that but like 1/100 instead of 1/10? It’s hardest to explain that one because with the stuck song thing, it’s there. I know it’s there. I can’t not imagine the song when it’s stuck. But I don’t “hear” it in any way like my ears hear things?

    Smell I can’t imagine at all, but I can usually recognize smells (“usually” because for things that are similar to a memory, like someone wearing the aftershave my dad used as a kid or something that smells like my grandmother’s house from 25 years ago, are likely a miss, but normal things I recognize without question).

    Visuals are probably more like smell in that I just don’t have them, but remembering visuals is more critical so I’m better at coping with that one.

    I will mention I’ve met people and then instantly forgotten everything about how they looked, like I could only tell you gender and race, but I recognized them when I saw them again. Now, I had context clues. Like I met a couple in a dive shop in town then saw them at the airport on the way to the trip we were both going on through the dive shop. I knew I’d probably see them at the airport and I knew them when I did. But I couldn’t have told you a thing about them until then! It was the weirdest experience, and I think not being able to visualize was the root cause.

  • Trump’s “Swiss” Watches Traced to Derelict Wyoming Strip Mall
  • Probably because most people don’t lie, it’s useful to have records of legit businesses, and (hopefully, but IANAL) it’s one more thing that someone could be charged on for fraud.

    It also probably has a panopticon effect. If people didn’t need to register, then there’s low monitoring of what people do and so those with more grey ethics are more likely to cheat the system. But because there’s a process, one assumes someone is watching, and therefore most people will stay in line; only the most scummy people will actually lie.

  • YSK most US states assign their electoral college votes by the state's popular vote

    I’ve seen several people claim that their state’s vote for the US presidential election doesn’t matter because their district is gerrymandered, which does not matter for most states.

    Most states use the state’s popular vote to determine who the entire state’s electoral college votes go to. No matter how gerrymandered your district is\*, every individual vote matters for assigning the electoral vote. [ETA: Nearly] Every single district in a state could go red but the state goes blue for president because of the popular vote.

    *Maine and Nebraska are the notable differences who allot individual electors based on the popular vote within their congressional districts and the overall popular vote. It’s possible there are other exceptions and I’m sure commenters will happily point them out.

    Edit: added strikethrough to my last statement because now I have confirmed it.

    > Of the 50 states, all but two award all of their presidential electors to the presidential candidate who wins the popular vote in the state (Maine and Nebraska each award two of their electors to the candidate who wins a plurality of the statewide vote; the remaining electors are allocated to the winners of the plurality vote in the states' congressional districts). (source)

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    I tried out glow powder on the first mini I’ve finished painting in the past few years

    I haven’t finished painting a mini in many years after vision problems made the hobby hard, but I started and finished this one in just two sessions. I also tried Stuart Semple’s glow powder for the first time and holy shit. (If you don’t know that name, I suggest googling it and reading about his ongoing battle against Anish Kapoor. It’s a fun read about making art accessible to everyone and not just rich pricks.)

    Size reference and not in the dark pics for comparison.

    It may not be my best or most complicated mini, but I’m thrilled with how it came out!

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