Tbf I just think it’s not up to me to redeem something by adding more flavor to it. Either it brings something to the table itself or it can just go (to the trash can)
Of course kale is going to taste like shit if you dont properly cook it. Boil it in salted water with potatoes, strain it, mix it with olive oil and garlic and serve it with chicken.
Here in Germany cook its for hours in vegetable broth with Mettwurst and Pinkel (sausages), bacon and onions, then its eaten with potatos and Kassler (smoked pork chop).
I came here to say that, but you got here first, so have my upvote. :)
Recipe:
bucket of kale leaves, shredded by hand, rinsed
half a lemon's juice
some teaspoons of salt
several tablespoons of deactivated / roasted / nutritional yeast
some teaspoons of your favourite spices (garlic / onion / paprica / tumeric / anything goes)
To be mixed in a huge bowl and laid out into 2 food dryers. Sorry, I don't have exact quantities, I always use both of my food driers. I run them at +70 C.
Edit with simple recipe: You boil the kale. Boil some potatoes. Throw them together and mash them with a masher. Add some fine cut bacon cubes (lightly fried) if you like and add pepper and salt and gravy to taste. Don't forget to serve "rookworst" on the side
This does not appear to be well known: kale really needs colder temperatures in order to taste best. It's sweetest when it has been through a frost or two. Unfortunately that's not always maximally profitable for Huge Giant Corporate farms and so your kale is grown in warmer temperatures and tends to be bitter.
On the plus side, it's incredibly easy to grow yourself.
Idk why people use coconut oil for things like that when olive oil is tastier, healthier, and, at least where I'm at, cheaper. I get the smoke point thing, but that's not relevant for use cases like that.
See my understanding of coconut oil is it's a better substitute for lard or shortening because 1. it's unsaturated fat rather than saturated fat and 2. it's not hydrogenated. It's a vegetable oil that's solid at room temperature, which is why you see it used in packaged baked goods a lot, because in the words of Alton Brown, "It'll stay moist and unctuous while having the shelf life of uranium."
It does have saturated fat though. Rule of thumb, the lower the temperature at which a fat goes solid, the more saturated it is. But the solid texture can be helpful when replacement other solid fats, true!
Kale is quite more fibrous, it's better cut in strips and blanched in salted water, then it gets softer. I quite like the taste, it's a great winter vegetable, mixed with diced potatoes and carrots for example
Kinnnda, but if you treat it like lettuce you'll be disappointed. It's a lot chewier. Think of it as in between lettuce and cabbage. Unless you're just bunging it in a soup you probably have to do a little more work on it.
I like to "massage" when eating eating raw. That's where you strip the leaves off the stalks and vigorously kneed and scrunch those up with your hands until they're soft to the touch.
Then you can throw in whatever dressing you like. Toasted sunflower seeds and dried cranberries are good at this stage, to really emphasise the toothiness of kale.
It's also kinda like spinach come to think of it. A lot of the same tricks work on it.
We were out of spinach (admittedly, I hate lettuce so I usually use spinach, instead) so I subbed in kale for my lunch sandwich, one time. I thought it worked alright, though.