Lemmy Shitpost @lemmy.world The Picard Maneuver @lemmy.world 2mo ago

Stay motivated

45 comments

FACT: 90% of cringeposters delete their accounts right when they're about to make a funny post.
- Unfortunately I think that only works from your instance's perspective. The majority of lemmy can still see the CIA oppressing you!
  
  I can't see it, therefore it's not happening.
Thx bb. Will continue to shitpost to hearts content. Someone has to read it which means I've already won.

Like those billboards that say does advertising work? JUST DID
And mod bots to remove them it seems
- Negative, I am a meat popsicle.
Hey! It's me! The CIA!
- Prove it, give me your social security number
  
  1
- You're the problem. It's you.
Phew... for a long minute there, I thought paranoia was getting the best of me, glad to see it's still the good ol' capitalist secret police state who are actually looking at me through that crack in the wall.
- Yes, this is reasonable.
- You mean that's what the hole in the wall was for?
  
  Oh dear...
Gah, I knew it! Curse you deep state!!
I'm actually not funny
- youre actually a cia bot.
Don't worry, I will never stop posting anime girls
The only time I get down voted is when taking about the definition of a burger or my thoughts on Mojang.
- What is your definition of a burger?
  
  Ground meat formed into a patty
- What's this about Mojang?
  
  I try to not shit on them every time they breathe.
  
  Like, It's okay to be critical when a company makes a decision you disagree with, but I feel like there's a lot of hate anytime they make any of public statement.
CIA and Kremlin: shake hands together
- 🤝
  
  <this was an automated generated image>
You never want opinions from bots. Only humans. But may be hard to figure out.
can't they just make an instance with fake accounts?
- it would be like r/subredditsimultor
Thanks I needed to hear this 🙏
Who bothers to look at votes?
- Politicians
CIA bots will downvote this, because it's true: Harris is not a legal US national, her birth certificate was forged. Be careful who you vote for!
I kinda envy folks who think that they have enough geopolitical importance for the CIA/NSA/ThreeLetterAgencies to be keeping tabs on them. I mean, it generally comes with a lot of baggage and delusions but, constantly that level of self-esteem and assuredness must be nice (not that I'm super low in my adult life).

Now, influence campaigns? That's a different animal altogether. There've been too many on the modern Internet for too long.
- Nice try CIA, trying to lull me into a false sense of insecurity, that I am less important than I think, pffft
  
  Insecurity is exactly where you need to be!
- NICKWITHA_K (HE/HIM)
  
  You're the only person who can see this message right now.
  
  Cease your investigations immediately!
  
  The FIVE EYES are on to your deception.
  
  Stand outside of your house and stare at the sky to receive corrective programing.
  
  Or travel to the nearest cloning center for retirement.
  
  Oh don't be silly!

45 comments