Rule

Shouldn’t it be “affect”? Clearly not the card for anyone that cares about the finer points of English.

I mean, given it's a Magic the Gathering card, it should be something more like

You have protection from everything with more than five lines of rules text. (This includes reminder text.)

Though this needs a mana cost too
- Well akshually pushes up glasses it's not exactly the same but if they made this card they'd probably make it read "You have protection from wordy (Something is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.)". Gotta use the key worded ability.
- Duke Nukem doesn't need mana. He's not magic. He's just a guy on steroids and testosterone. You're not actually summoning him, he just showed up.
- Also it should be a grey border lol
- I'm not an mtg person, would protection mean only enemy spells? The original is your own too. Would be cool to have a board wipe that couldn't affect you
No no no, it just means you can't bring out this card as a result of a spell with more than 5 lines of text.
“im”

Of all of Duke's toxic traits, illiteracy probably isn't one.

He's not illiterate, he's just too cool to care about that nerd stuff.
- Is he, though? Duke Nukem is a huge fanboy. He can't go give minutes without quoting some movie or other.
  
  Relevant comic: https://thepunchlineismachismo.com/archives/comic/whos-to-say-duke-cant-have-hobbies

There’s an ability like that in Pokémon Showdown’s Super Staff Bros mode. It makes you immune to any attacks with complicated names.

very annoying to play against but also very funny concept

Sure, but what's the cost tho?

Clearly it has no mana value on purpose, you have to cascade into this bad boy.

This is so funny because counterspell would still just be the best in the game

Above average complexity card in Yugioh when I started- Great Moth

This monster cannot be Normal Summoned or Set. This card can only be Special Summoned by Tributing "Petit Moth" on the 4th of your turns after "Petit Moth" has been equipped with "Cocoon of Evolution".

Great Moth card effect fits as size 8 or so font. Clearly legible.

Average complexity I see onYugioh cards now - Mirage Swordsman

If a face-up FIRE Fusion Monster(s) you control is destroyed by battle or card effect: You can Special Summon this card from your GY (if it was there when the monster was destroyed) or hand (even if not). At the start of the Damage Step, if this card battles an opponent's monster: You can destroy both battling monsters. If this card is destroyed by battle or another card's effect: You can Special Summon 1 Level 7 or lower monster that is "Flame Swordsman" or mentions it, from your Deck or Extra Deck. You can only use each effect of "Mirage Swordsman" once per turn.

At this stage not only are fonts dropped to something like 3 and barely readable, but words like Graveyard got shortened to GY because there was too many letters. And for the current record holder of text "Endymion, the Mighty Master of Magic" it almost wasn't even enough.

Modern tcg will make you need this Duke card lmao

"Spells that have more than 5 lines of text can't bring you into existence."

Hooray for spelling.

Protection from universes beyond crap