Sex

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/nocturnemagician on 2023-06-27 22:51:18+00:00. *** Idk how to tell my partner (20f and im 21f) that I just don't like vanilla sex.. It's just boring for me.. I don't feel anything..

I don't even know if im normal anymore haha for a little background I started masturbating myself kind of young? So i'm like "did I used all of my sensitivity down there???" 😭

I feel like I just need more, I need pain and all kinds of things than just vanilla but I don't know how to tell them, im just too shy tbh and im their first partner they ever have sex with so I feel like it's even harder?? (we've been together for 2years!!)

I don't know when I should tell them? Last time we saw each other It took me 2weeks to tell them that It was hard for me to do the first move because I don't want to force them to do anything 😭 (because im always the one to make the first move, ig if im shy they must be too??)

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/madao_irl on 2023-06-27 22:31:37+00:00. *** Ok so starting strong with explaining my insecurity I went with a young escort kinda amateurish because I wanted the label of virgin off of my chest. So yeah we tried 3 stances for 15 mins but nothing folks, I felt aroused and stuff but not to the point of ejactulating. In fact I had 0 emotional attachment with the girl so it was like a mechanical process kind of thing. I need to mention I'm on a low dosage of antidepressants due to ocd so that might count,but I don't think so cause alone I can masrurbate easily. All in all I won't ever go with an escort and the first time was meeeeh. But do I still count as a virgin? Also I'm a 22 y/o M

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/IceColdEyes36 on 2023-06-27 21:54:06+00:00. *** I came across a friends profile on a threesome finder app. I brought it up to her but not yet to her boyfriend who is also on the app. I hung out with her and we talked about it and she gave me his number to text him.

Me and him have been texting for a couple days. I’ve known the couple for awhile. (I’m more comfortable talking to his girlfriend.)

Should I wait and get to know him more and possibly hang out with only him and see how we click or be direct about it as I was with his girlfriend over text. I’m a guy also btw and I think it would be better for me to bring it up first than his girlfriend

-How should I bring it up with him?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/owlbrat on 2023-06-27 19:58:41+00:00. *** I’m still kind of gathering my feelings about the situation but I was hoping I could get some viewpoints about it first.

Recently me and the guy I am in a situation with were “accosted “ by on of his friends over this so it was on my mind today.

Basically me and this guy I have had a quiet relationship for sometime now and its great but when his friends found out about me , shit kinda hit the fan and his friends main point were

( you can be bi but don’t go back and forth )

I think this has to do with the fact that I am not the only “ situation” he is in

I was mostly wondering have any ladies actually felt this was more than a stigma and have you ever had anything health related come up because of it ?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Apprehensive_End_824 on 2023-06-27 21:38:44+00:00. *** Yesterday I let my boyfriend get too 2nd base and we did some nipple play. I think he did something too hard and now my nipples hurt like hell.

Any advise to ease the pain? Or make it stop I have work soon.

Ps. Boyfriend already knows and won't stop appolgisesing how should I tell him that he's not in the wrong and it's fine beacuse it's our first time?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Throwaway-2040 on 2023-06-27 21:20:35+00:00. *** We're, 28M and 29F, somehow vanilla and we just did the basic things. We have been together for 10 years and we are both each other's first couple. We've played with some toys in the bed and some oral, but not crazy things. Recently, she gave me a card of "you can ask for whatever you want in bed for 24 hours".

We've discussed a lot of times about our sex boundaries, for example, we both agree on no poo in the bed. So I know which kind of things she would be comfortable doing. Since we haven't tried a lot of things I don't know where to start.

Can you help me with a list of things we should try during this "let's get crazy" period?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/DOODECAHEDRON on 2023-06-27 19:24:10+00:00. *** I’m dating this new girl and when I first went down on her, I was on my side with my nose pretty much in her butt, and she kept getting her booty hole really close to my tongue.. I didn’t think much of it besides she’s getting close to orgasm so she’s grinding my tongue.

Long story short, when I went down on her again a few days ago, I asked her to sit over my face and I licked her booty a few times and she moaned intensely and turns out she really likes it.

My question is, how can I make it more pleasurable? I tried only licking her booty and while she likes it, doesn’t seem as turned on as when I “surprise” lick her booty when i go down on her.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/m0mmyndaddy on 2023-06-27 20:28:13+00:00. *** My partner and I are starting an OF and with it an Amazon wishlist but we do not know what to put in it. Sooo what are your sex favorites? Fav toys, lubes, lingerie, candles, sheets, pillows anything that helps spice things up or makes sex more enjoyable or easier. Thank you <3

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/No_Tea8846 on 2023-06-27 19:49:31+00:00. *** Last night after some making out and fondling, my fwb pulled me on top to ride him. It was uncomfortable but that didn’t surprise me because we haven’t had sex in a while and I haven’t been sleeping with anyone else. I eventually rolled over so he could get on top but once he started entering me it got worse. He had pulled his fingers out of me right before this and I really didn’t think it was a lubrication issue at the time. But later when I got home, I realized I was spotting blood and now I am almost positive it’s from not being properly lubricated. It sounds crazy that I wouldn’t have known this when it was happening but again, I felt fine with his fingers inside me then we went straight to PIV so there was never a moment that it didn’t feel right. I was already expecting some soreness because it had been so long so that’s truly what I thought until I saw blood. The part that is bothering me is that it seems like HE would have noticed while inside of me and realized I needed more attention before continuing. We were not using protection (both tested, no other partners and I’m on BC). I trust him and don’t feel like he did anything out of line bc I wanted it and didn’t speak up about my discomfort, but I feel like he had to know because he would have been able to feel what was going on inside of me. I guess I’m just wanting someone to chime in and tell me I’m wrong and that he wouldn’t have noticed so I can have peace of mind. I don’t want to think he would have intentionally kept going with painful sex.

If it matters: I am 24f and he is 33m. I’m far more inexperienced than him.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/BushyBeard93 on 2023-06-27 19:43:06+00:00. *** The short answer for most on r/sex is "you break up with them." But for those who've stayed, what are your tips? I'm thinking more physical incompatibility (eg, genital mismatch, height, medical condition or illness) than mismatched libidos. For us, it's a genital size mismatch. Thanks!

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Organic_Ad6606 on 2023-06-27 14:21:01+00:00. *** I met this couple a few months ago who used to joke around about having a threesome together. I told them that I was a lesbian (as I have been asked for a threesomes in the past and it makes me incredibly uncomfortable). They are very kind and sweet and have been relatively respectful of my boundaries. I feel as though it is my fault that I used to play along with their “jokes” assuming they knew I only liked women and wouldn’t actually expect me to be okay with it.

Recently they have have been more forward with their approach and I am starting to realize that they are not joking. My tipping point was when a few of us went out and got drunk and the girlfriend tried to kiss me a few times. At one point, I gave her a quick peck on the lips but she quickly put her tongue in my mouth and I pulled back immediately. I think she was slightly offended by this. I distanced myself from them that night but they have now heavily suggested that it’s going to happen the next time we go over to their place.

I feel like this is my fault because I naturally have a very flirty personality and used to play along as a joke (I’m like this with most people). Most of the time I just laugh it off.

Other than this, they are incredibly sweet and kind and have helped me out more times than I can count. I enjoy my relationship with them and don’t want that to be jeopardized. I am also feeling down that I feel like that was the only reason they wanted to be friends with me.

How can I have a conversation with them about this and try to maintain a relationship with the both of then without offending anyone?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/alt5questions5 on 2023-06-27 19:08:57+00:00. *** Been with my boyfriend for over 2 years now. Our sex life has gotten less frequent but when it happens it's enjoyable. I love coming with him inside me, sometimes even just fingers or just on his face, stomach etc., and yes I touch myself to orgasm or at least to just finish me off in the end in all scenarios.

Overall sex is great, when it happens, except it doesn't happen as much as I want it to anymore so I thought maybe solo orgasams would take the edge off.

Here comes the kicker, I get cozy, open up some porn I like, get wet, touch myself and for the big finale that I was hoping for never comes. I don't mean that I don't orgasm because I do, I can feel it, I can feel the movement the twitch etc., but it doesn't feel satisfying anymore. It barely feels like anything. What happened to me? Why don't I enjoy orgasming by myself anymore? How do I fix this?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Emergency_Survey3066 on 2023-06-27 19:08:09+00:00. *** It's something we've both been interested in, and something we've talked a lot about. We're planning to start it soon, and the idea is that I'll have a sort of singnal for days when I do or don't want to do it, and of course we'll still communicate. Is there anything else we should be considering before we go for it?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/throwrabfspast on 2023-06-27 18:57:19+00:00. *** We have been together for a year. Recently, he were talking about stupid things we’ve done in the past before we knew each other. He told me there was this guy who used ride around town he was in and he paid him for sex. He said it was unprotected. I’m in shock and I hate this feeling. I feel sick. I feel like I can’t touch him and that he’s dirty. He said he was curious and also didn’t think he would ever get a girlfriend so he said that’s the biggest reason it happened. I don’t know what to do. I feel like he’s so dirty. The guy he slept with sometimes would sleep with two people in a day. I was okay with touching him before but now I’m not. How do I get past this?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Sophiche on 2023-06-27 18:39:02+00:00. *** English isn’t my first language, sorry if you have difficulties at understanding me I’ll try my best

I also dunno if my topic is in the accurate subreddit

I just feel weird because I think I appreciate being "restrained" by him (not forcefully ofc), for example, if we playfully fight/wrestle, I love him to win against him and block my arms or something like that, he’s tall, broad shoulders, muscled, and I like his "strong side" of him. Same goes for sex, I like when he hold my arms or my wrists, or when he kisses me against a wall

I like the fact he can dominate me, the fact he’s stronger than me, it’s arousing

I don’t want him to hurt me but I appreciate to be a fragile thing next to him

Is my brain broken ? Why am I like that, I’m not trolling, I’m a true feminist in my mind and it’s not very coherent with myself

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/King-Mugs on 2023-06-27 17:04:39+00:00. *** I’ve been with my girlfriend for 4 months and she’s amazing, the relationship is great. Sex has been very good, we’re pretty good at communicating in and out of the bedroom. The other day we were talking about future plans and the idea of having kids together came up (has come up before). She’s on birth control and jokingly asked when I was going to get her pregnant and I jokingly responded something like “couldn’t you tell I was trying to get you pregnant last night?” Then made a joke about getting her BC out.

She said she didn’t know why, but that me saying that gave her some feelings. Like a “oh, what’s this now?”. So I noted that and then next time we had sex and I was about to orgasm I whispered something like “fuck I want to get you pregnant”. And let me tell you, she dug her claws into my back. And weirdly enough I reeeeeally seemed to enjoy saying it? By male standards that was a really long orgasm for me.

Did we stumble on to a breeding kink? She’s been on birth control our whole relationship, I’ve finished inside her before but specifically saying that seemed to do a thing to both of us.

Are there other ways to explore/have fun with this? I didn’t even know this was a possible kink until I looked into it. Anyone else have similar experiences/interests?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/GreatCaptain5219 on 2023-06-27 17:18:07+00:00. *** My gf (20F) and I (20m) have amazing sex. Sometimes they’re just quickys out in public, other times they’re very intimate. We do the usual positions, doggy, missionary, sideways, cowgirls and reverse. We spoke abt trying new positions but never really found one that was interesting to try. Do you guys know any good ones that you’ve tried and it was amazing? I want to expand our love making

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/UsernamesRhard on 2023-06-27 16:40:26+00:00. *** I (26M) have been dating my gf (23F) for a year now. We are distance, about 90 minutes away and see eachother pretty much every weekend. We have a very loving and understanding relationship with good communication. She attends medical school and has very little time during the semester but still finds a way to make time for me which I appreciate very much and I let her know it.

Early into the relationship we had a sex life nothing out of the ordinary, she would initiate, I would initiate and it was great. Weeks after we started dating she revealed to me her past with SA and it seemed very hard for her to bring up so I didn’t press her for any more information. Because of this I try to be vigilant that I constantly ask for consent, over communicate if XYZ is okay and so on.

Then med school started and naturally our sex life took a big hit, which I completely understand, my sex drive goes through the floor when I’m stressed so I didn’t have a problem with it as I would never want to add another stressor. That being said the majority of sex we would have during the semester were weekends after football games when we’d been drinking and have drunk sex. She told me her stress goes away when she drinks and makes it easier for her to be in the mood. Which I didn’t mind at the time, but there definitely times in her intoxicated state I would see glimpses of her trauma come out (no need to go into detail on how that presented). So there are surely some triggers. She told me about 7 months ago the ways I would initiate made her uncomfortable at times so I have since stopped initiating out of fear I would trigger her.

Fast forward to this summer, and we still have just drunk sex even with her being out of school and I have stopped initiating because I feel it might be a trigger. I brought this up with her recently and she told me she just has anxiety, she doesn’t like the loss of control, and that being drunk helps her relax. And I communicated that it makes me feel like she’s not attracted to me and it seems alcohol is a required catalyst now.

She has assured me it has nothing to do with me and primarily her own anxiety. But my concern is alcohol tends to have a negative affect on me sexually and I don’t enjoy drunk sex as much and would prefer more sober sex as I’m beginning to feel a disconnect in the physical side of our relationship. As we’ve had sober sex just 3 times since January. And it wasn’t like this early on either.

Now I plan to have another conversation with her, but she really struggles to talk about sex which I assume has to do with her past trauma, as she is very receptive in all our other talks.

So I’m looking for advice on how to go about this conversation without triggering her trauma and make her as comfortable as possible to discuss this. I want to discuss ways I can initiate that won’t make her uncomfortable and how we can work on having sex sober more often vs drunk sex.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Fit_Promotion_5643 on 2023-06-27 12:43:14+00:00. *** Wife and I are considering the option of me getting a vasectomy and she had some questions. Couldn't find much online to answer.

Does it change the taste of your ejaculate? Does the consistency change like more watery or anything?

Does it change the amount that you ejaculate? Can you by looking if someone has had one?

Thanks.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Time-Pollution-5969 on 2023-06-27 16:48:54+00:00. *** My (20M) girlfriend (19F) is a virgin and she wants to have sex for the first time. I haven’t been with a virgin so I have questions.

I previously fit two fingers inside her, but it was tight at she asked me to go back to one.

Later when she wanted to try sitting on my penis to see what it was like (which is maybe more like 4-5 fingers), it wouldn’t go in - she made it seem like there was a wall there about an inch in.

I would have thought that if I could fit two fingers, there would be no hymen there to “break” per se, however the fact that she hit a wall of sorts with my penis makes it seem like there is.

What’s the likelihood that we need to anticipate a hymen there if I am able to fit two fingers inside her? I plan to be careful regardless, I’m just trying to figure out what to expect.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/supermoron69 on 2023-06-27 16:46:25+00:00. *** I'm (29M) recently single as of a year ago for pretty much the first time in my adult life and have been experimenting with sleeping around for the first time.

I just found out today that I'm positive for Chlamydia, likely from a partner I had a few weeks ago. We tried to use condoms but they ended up causing issues with maintaining an erection so ended up dropping it (dumb, I know).

I recently met a girl that I'm finally really into, like I really like this girl and see a future with her - and she likes me too. We literally had our first date last week and had sex, and I was likely positive during that encounter but didn't find out until today. I got my routine test just on Sunday so the timing overlap was unfortunate.

Obviously I'm going to call and tell her tonight, as I care about her and it's the right thing to do. Does anyone have experience with anything similar? Is there any chance this girl will still want to see me or am I completely screwed? Devastated to hear that I may have spread it to her and obviously personally am very worried this will be the end of seeing her.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/porkchops29 on 2023-06-27 15:46:20+00:00. *** We are 22F and 23M in a relationship for 4 years (mostly LDR but currently meeting 1-2 times a month). This is both of our first relationship and we are extremely attracted to each other and in love. We love spending time with each other. We both are more into intimacy and making love than just having sex for the sake of it like it happens with hookup folks… we both take turns to make sure each of us are enjoying the experience and pleased adequately (i.e., we both put efforts so it’s not like he doesn’t care about my pleasure or what I like).

But like I said, it’s our first relationship and he was not into sexy stuff before this. He had never had make out sessions or sex before meeting me, so doesn’t really know exactly what women likes… this leads me to the actual part…

I’m more into intimacy, long makeout/caressing sessions before we get into all the foreplay/hands stuff. Physical touch is my love language and i like being caressed, held, pulled closer, kissed, all of that romantic cheesy stuff before making out. I like being touched on the back, waist, arm, thighs, basically any kind of non-sexual skin touch that makes me feel wanted.. which overall makes the experience more intense or loving for me.

And he doesn’t know so much in details about what I would like better. But he does a pretty good job overall and I do love the experience… except for he doesn’t usually start with long caressing time. He goes straight into hands and touchy stuff. And I think it’s important for me to have a buildup first.

So should Iexplain these tiny details to him so that the experience is better for the both of us? Girls, have you done it before with your long-term bf? Boys, would you be up for this conversation with your gf about what she likes or would it make you feel inadequate or something?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Fluffy-Flamingo-7864 on 2023-06-27 15:40:10+00:00. *** Hi all, after a bit of advice.

Yesterday I was feeling horny as always due to my high sex drive. I'm in the car with my husband and he's driving down the motorway when all of a sudden I begin to have an orgasm. There was no touching, no dirty talk etc happening at the time, it literally came from nowhere and it happened multiple times. I felt like I'd had a good hard fuck afterwards and was all flustered.

Never happened before but does anybody know why it happened? Or is it even normal? Thanks.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/EnoughMirror734 on 2023-06-27 15:38:31+00:00. *** It’s honestly the weirdest thing ever. It doesn’t happen all the time but when it does I find myself waking up in the middle of the night to masturbate and everytime I have the best orgasms ever!! I don’t understand why it happens. Maybe I was dreaming of it and woke up suddenly to do it…? Idk maybe.

Does anyone else experience it? Is there a name for it?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Anxious_Ferret_017 on 2023-06-27 15:37:49+00:00. *** My main problems are: -i cannot stop see sex as some sort of...well, as in title, performance that i need to be great at, if i want to have an partner (or rather make them don't leave me). I cannot stop view sex like thing that everyone just know what to do imediatly, but i will be the one clumsy and cluesless

-and i don't have any experienc, and for lot of guys that's an red flag (because they want women who know what she wants and how to do it 🤷)- it will be problematic for me, im adult (20) and i start getting older and older (fact that i never had an boyfriend or an kiss, and don't meet anyone because lack of opurtunity bite me realy hard and honestly make me feel worst almost every day (i may have depression, but you know, just another thing that make me feel bad) -escpecialy that im an woman and for most of people it would be something unbelivable that i have such lack of love life, witch would be another red flag, because men may think something is wrong with me.Im basically something like female incel.)

-i hate the feeling of vurnabelity that sex gives. Maybe this is connected with that i have been bullied and alone most of my life at school, but it terryfies me how sex is intimate.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/SpecificCicada4758 on 2023-06-27 15:47:07+00:00. *** I'm a 32 year old guy and how horny I'm getting depends very strongly on how long ago it is that I last masturbated/came. It's been like that for many years. I know this is the case for everyone to some extend, but it seems too much in my case.

When I don't come for like 7-9 days I will get as horny as I've ever been, which is great and I don't have any issues at all. Also getting regular spontaneous erections and things like that.

After coming (especially mastburbating, i.e. not sex with another person) I will barely get horny at all for a couple of days. I have little interest in sex and would avoid getting into the situation where I could have sex with a woman, because I've had some experiences where I couldn't get an erection. I'm really aware and feel bad during these days.

I'm going out and dating regularly and I'm always busy planning around this issue, like trying to make sure I don't come like 7 days (which seems to be the sweet spot..) before having an occasion for sex. It's obviously very annoying to do this..

Like I said, I know everyone has this to some extend, but the difference is really between 0 and 100 (all totally fine and sex is amazing after waiting for a week) for me. Does anyone else experience this? And might there be anything I could do about this? Thanks!

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Ok_Royal9477 on 2023-06-27 15:35:05+00:00. *** So im a straight man who does have a high sex drive, Im still a virgin (im 25) but over the past year I have just lost desire to have sex with women. The reason why is because women just dont seem to make us feel desired enough and I have always felt like its the mans job to sexually desire a woman while women are there to be sexually desired. It seems like women are sexually attracted to male attention but not actually men while gay men seem to love the male body. The only part women seem to care about is a mans cock and thats because when it gets hard it makes women think "he must be hard because of how sexy I am"

Most women seem to find the female body more sexy and attractive also so If I have sex with a woman then it sucks knowing that she will never find my body as attractive like a womans.

Its like a womans sexuality is just based off attention, women dont even have any interest in looking at naked men or men in porn but they will look at women or they will compliment a women for her appearance while a man gets compliments for his personality (i.e his humour or intelligance)

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/darkchocolatesweet on 2023-06-27 15:18:44+00:00. *** Im 17F and even tho I know it's normal to not have much experience, im super insecure with not knowing what to do, I was really afraid of kissing, not so much now, but still, i was making out with a guy, he is 23, and he wanted to take things further, and it's not as if I dont want to, or that I dont feel ready, I do, but Im so afraid of not being good that I just can't let myself enjoy stuff, it's not the first time this has happened, and it drives me crazy

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Total-Drama--- on 2023-06-27 15:10:54+00:00. *** We both like very rough sex, I also don't have any issues with getting wet so there's a lot of fluids... and I am still hurt by his piercing.

After a while it just hurts, especially during doggy style. Usually we have sex a few times a day so the first one is actually alright but after that I guess I am already irritated and it hurts.

We just started dating so it's new for me. Do I ask him to remove it? Can you even safely remove it?

Will I just get used to it? I've got a very high libido so I hope to have sex more than once a day also after the "honeymoon" phrase, if he's up for it.

Bonus question for piercing-owners - can it actually make his penis more sensitive? I was lucky enough to have only very vocal and active partners but I've never had a partner THAT sensitive. And it's also my first time with someone with a pierced dick and I wonder if that's just a coincidence. I thought I was loud, he is actually louder.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/invictusubermensch on 2023-06-27 15:06:03+00:00. *** As a long distance couple, we normally do sexting quite a lot but now we’re wondering to spice things up with sex apps and games while exploring new kinks together. It will be some time before we meet again so this is all we have for now. So could you please recommend some great sex apps both on iOS and Android.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Baballe12 on 2023-06-27 15:04:54+00:00. *** Hello, im a virgin guy so totally a noob but recently i gain interest in how to practice oral etc... but i have a question

How do i know when a girl orgasmed? Like if i stop too early she will be frustrated? And if i continue after she orgasmed she will not enjoy it as many as before because she already orgasmed

Can you give me advice please by being respectful i know i know nothing (jon snow) but this is a question i have in mind

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/takamatsu724 on 2023-06-27 14:50:25+00:00. *** My birthday is coming up and my wife is asking me what I want. In all honesty, I don't want her to buy me anything. The thing I want most is that she put more effort into our sex life. We're not a dead bedroom but it's far from an exciting bedroom. But I'm not sure how to ask for this.

I don't really want to ask for a specific sexual favor because I worry it will become a once a year "special" thing. What I'm looking for is something that will pay dividends year round. (Maybe it's best not to conflate this with my birthday at all?) At the same time, I don't want to hurt her self esteem. Neither of us are great communicators about sex, so this is not something we talk about frequently. Neither of us are completely open about what we want from our sex life.

For the record, I understand this is not a one-way street. I am open to "getting better" myself -- and have tried to over the past few years. But I often feel like I'm the only one trying to spice things up. But understand I still have a long way to go, too. Maybe phrase this less as "can you get better at sex for me" and more as "let's get better at sex together"? I don't know. Any suggestions would be appreciated.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Brandonbdc on 2023-06-27 13:46:04+00:00. *** My girlfriend (26f) and I (26m) have been together for 3 years and our libidos don’t really match. However we make it work. Being the guy I can have sex basically anywhere any time, I’m always ready and need little to no external stimulation to get me going. Honestly it’s a blessing and a curse haha where as my girlfriend she only wants sex maybe 3-4 times a month.

I came here to ask what are some things i could do to help get her going? I know you may be thinking “ask her duh” well, I have and the answers she’s given me when I do them it doesn’t seem to work.

So I’m curious from a womans perspective what are some things your guy does that can turn you on or want him later in the night? Even if it has nothing to do with physical touch and it’s mental stuff.

Thank you!

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Quiet-Tax-4455 on 2023-06-27 13:45:08+00:00. *** I feel it is really hard to share every side to this so I may miss details

My (30m) gf (28f) of almost 5 months is not horny hardly as much as me. She says it is just a difference between a man and women, but I know for a fact that many women have crazy sex drives. My brother's ex exhausted him. She was so horny all the time and wanted lots of sex. But of course I dont want to start comparing her to other people like that, to her. That is unhelpful.

For an example of what frustrates me. Hyping up what we are going to do sexually over text and then later when we meet there is no sexual energy from her.

Saturday she comes over. We flirt and get a little touchy. Talk about what we are going to do later. End up going out drinking downtown. Come home and snack and she wants to watch something. She seems to completely forget about sex. And for me its been on my mind all afternoon. She says she is too tired and says she hopes we have fun next day. Next day we go out and walk a lot. End up having a picnic at the park. Once again she is too tired for sex. Yes, both days were long, but sex doesnt seem to be a priority to her.

for me I feel needy or almost pervy to interupt our day to ask about "fun time". Like if we come home from a night out and she wants to snack and watch something. I feel like a needy pestering person to bring up sex.

Some other things had come up that week and I asked her if there was anything I could do to make her feel more loved or if there was something she felt was missing from our relationship. It ended up with me acknowledging that I felt something was up. I told her I was confused by our sex life. I told her that sometimes I feel that maybe there is an attraction issue. I told her that I sometimes feel like maybe im doing something wrong.

She felt bad and said she didnt want to lead me on and then suddenly shut me down. She says she is insanely attracted to me. I brought up our Saturday, explaining how we often talk big about sex and then leave no energy or time for it. She didnt seem to get what I was saying. Overall I keep trying to reasure her that I wasnt upset at her, or wanted her to feel obligated. I asked what I could do to help. She just doesnt really know I guess.

We share responsibilities. I go out of my way to do stuff to save her energy. I know a typical response would be to assume that I dont help in the kitchen and that she is carrying a lot of wieght in the relationship. That is not the case. She has been very vocal on how good I am at that, even though I dont think she should feel the need to.

To me, it feels like a priority issue. I would change plans, come home earlier from things, etc to provide time and energy for intimacy. However she talks big about it, but then doesnt follow through on it. She would make time for other things, like making a snack or watching a movie. But doesnt seem to think ahead on our intimacy.

I end up feeling needy and undesired. I dont know what to do. I love her and want to figure out things that help our sex life. To me its really important. She definitely likes sex, I just think she doesnt know how to prioritize it.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/basilmint29 on 2023-06-27 13:27:49+00:00. *** My bf and I have been together for over a year and the sex is great, but my libido is a bit higher than his. I know it's completely normal to have differences in libido but I can't help but feel insecure about it, I just wish he'd initiate a little more often so I'd feel more desired. We have talked about it but I don't want to bring it up again because you can't control your libido, I don't want to make him feel bad, and I also don't want him to exaggerate his desire to make me happy, I want it to be genuine.

I was thinking maybe there's some things I could do to try and turn him on before we even get to the bedroom to encourage him to initiate? I was thinking short skirts but it's very cold at the moment so any other suggestions would be great. We are in our early 20's and don't live together.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Secret-Brother7688 on 2023-06-27 14:28:34+00:00. *** Never done it before. Always worn a condom. I feel that orgasming inside a woman is the best feeling I can think of. However, the way that the condom prevents the semen from shooting out and kind of clogs the release, I feel puts a slight damper on the experience. Aside from the physical feeling, the mental sense of "I am putting my seed into you" isn't there. I can't wait for the day that I can finally experience this. Am I over hyping the idea though?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/UWUgal420 on 2023-06-27 08:24:11+00:00. *** i genuinely get very turned on by my boyfriend’s body odours. i really enjoy the aromatics in sex from things like genitals, sweat, discharges, cum and so on. like i would totally get a scented candle of his pussy. curious if anyone else is like this or if i’m a freaky gal.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Sexcursion on 2023-06-27 13:13:36+00:00. *** I fantasize often about large groups and while I know and understand all of the safety risk etc.. I still fantasize the same. I often talk about fantasies having to do with prison or large mens camp of some type. Your input would be very helpful. Thank you all in this community.

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/whatsinthebox72 on 2023-06-27 13:05:49+00:00. *** I’ve only had this happen a couple times in my life. I started hooking up with this guy, and he’s big. Not too big- like perfection big, it feels perfect. But towards the end when he’s behind me, I start getting really nauseous, but it still feels good so I want to keep going. When he finishes, I usually need a minute to just sit there and soothe my stomach lol! I guess this is a good problem to have, but last time it made going down on him hard because my gag reflex was already activated. Is there anything I can do to prevent this little tummy ache so I can make the experience better for both of us?

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The original was posted on /r/sex by /u/Liberalgirl23 on 2023-06-27 10:57:18+00:00. *** Its quite a challenge living with a couple in a small apartment for myself to find time for me to indulge in something that I've started getting into. I have so much enjoyed the good feeling of pleasuring myself the the art of masturbation. Its a good feeling to do it but its been a challenge for me to find time with two people around. hard to be quiet and keep them from hearing me.