Asklemmy @lemmy.ml Vode An @lemmy.ml 1y ago

What’s the funniest internet argument you’ve ever read?

Inspired by this Jon Bois video where body builders argue about the number of days in a week.

PLEASE be sure to include a link or screen cap.

Edit: thanks to 18107 for a li k to the original

76 comments

Sharks are smooth

Edit: 1 billion lions VS every pokemon is also up there
- I'm quite sure the artist is winning that one. He's riling up so many people by just repeating a single phrase.
  
  Like, anyone who thinks he's serious is really not yet fit for the Internet.
  
  RIP the one guy that believed him when "corrected".
  
  It's my favorite argumentative tactic. I've been in a months long debate with youtube losers about whether one of every Pokemon would beat 1,000,000,000 (one billion) lions
- Ken M vibes
- Gold
The forum post you were referring to.
- Even after seeing the enactments, I do feel myself stupider browsing that forum post.
  
  I go out of my way to not reread it because I genuinely feel like I lose an IQ point that I’ll never get back.
- Lol, this Josh dude really thinks a week is Sunday-Sunday. So does that mean every Sunday is part of two different weeks?
  
  Oh shit, more people join in. Does the dumb bodybuilder meme have a grain of truth?
  
  Maybe every other week has no Sundays at all.
- Thank you, I should have linked the original as well.
- Wow. That's Linus Torvalds levels of screaming, "ARE YOU FUCKING STUPID?!"
  
  People got really worked up back in 2008.
- For some reaon my IP is banned om that forum.
  
  Are you Josh?
Years ago, on IMDb, a poster called rabbitmoon kept a thread going for years on the Rambo board that is still the best I've ever seen.

The whole thing started with him posting that he was shocked when, about a third of the way through the movie, there was a scene in which a character was shot with a bullet from a gun. Then he countered, completely earnestly and deadpan, every response he got.

The original thread is long gone, and the only thing I could find of it is an excerpt that was posted on Reddit - LINK
- The IMDB forums should have been protected by UNESCO. I will not elaborate.
- It gets better every time
  
  During this film, there is a scene where for a few frames, a person is depicted as having been shot, by a bullet from a gun to the chest.
  
  And he definitely dies as a result of being shot.
- The sheer amount of people replying to the guy, completely oblivious to sarcasm.
  It's a shame it's gone because it went on for much longer than what's in the reddit post.
  
  Yeah - I used to check in on it from time to time, and there were always new responses, and new people trying to argue with him, and he'd just run them in circles with hilariously overly literal (mis)interpretations of whatever they said. It went on for years.
  
  I'm pretty sure I remember the admin deleting part of it while it was still active, and eventually deleting it entirely. It's a shame - it should've been saved for posterity.
That was hilarious! I don't have an argument but reading through that reminded me of 2 older forum posts. A little off topic but here:

I put on my wizard hat and robe

The Bobbit Worm Chronicles
- Haha, bloodninja was a legendary troll.
  
  Invertebrates give me the ick, so I hope you don’t mind me not clicking that one lol.
  
  If you enjoyed that video, many of the creators videos are hilarious.
  
  I highly recommend the one about the highest scoring American football game of all time (it’s over 200).
  
  If there's any invertebrate that should make people uncomfortable, it's fucking bobbit worms. They are nightmares given form
- The bobbit worm chronicles is an excellent read
- The Bobbit Worm Chronicals in article form, complete with an interview.
  
  I have to say, I totally would buy a 5 ft long bobbit worm in a pet store, even without an epic backstory.
- There a lot more of that bloodninja...somewhere.
  
  This made me think of bash.org for the first time in a decade, lol. Tried to go there but timed out. Did find a link that had most of the bloodninja stuff I remember.
  
  https://originaltrilogy.com/topic/The-Legend-of-Bloodninja/id/6934
- damn I gotta write down your names or something
Any argument from /r/BanVideoGames is fun lol. People don't realize it's satire and it becomes the funniest part of that subreddit 😂
- That sounds promising. What are the odds it’s been taken over by “true believers”? That seems to be the fate of any long-running satire on Reddit. TheDonald, most infamously.
  
  I think some people could think it's not satire but that's because there is a rule saying "we are not satire". Guess what? That rule is satire too
There's a reason it's called "bodybuilding" and not "brainbuilding".
- This interaction is so unhindged wtf. Nistropher Colon holy shit.
  
  Perfect score, 5/7
- That's such a good one
Oh my god I was going to post the same thread, but I instead highly recommend the mega64 reenactment of the bodybuilding forum fight: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JqylqmDl0Mw
- That ruled.
This isn't exactly what you are looking for but it is really fun so I had to share: https://www.tor.com/2011/08/31/wikihistory/
- Oh god, John Titor nonsense…I dig it.
The one and only Sadam vs Hitler thread

EDIT: wait, oh god, they deleted the actual thread. Tragedy I tell you!
I know it stretches the definition of Internet Argument, but this video never fails to make me laugh:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qxdrq9DZWpU
- Hilarious! Is he talking about the Frozen sisters?
  
  They were playing a game of Hedbanz / Headbands / Celebrity , and one of them had The Good Witch Glinda from Wizard of Oz as their character, and they are arguing about them not guessing it based on the clues.
  
  SHE CAME DOWN IN A BUBBLE DOG!!!!!!
  
  They're arguing about the Wizard of Oz. I'm pretty sure this video is older than Frozen.
Well, Hydrogen vs Boost obviously.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6LKNTJN3Ug

(I didn't 'read' it but it's funny)
I started reading your post 14 minutes ago and read 30 seconds every other minute then watched the video (but I didn’t count those minutes) and now I’ve grown chest hair. That was some good reppin
- I hope you take a rest day,so you can two more in before the week ends 🙃
- I hope you are not a woman, chest hair is ... difficult for a woman.
Years ago (early 2000s), Dilbert.com used to have a "Lazy Inventor" section of the website. "All Talk, No Funding." This was fine for a while, then someone suggested "child free days [at restaurants and stores]".

You would have thought he'd suggested clubbing baby seals. The shitstorm it generated was legendary. I'm pretty sure that was a direct contribution to them disabling that feature a few months later.

I found it in the Wayback machine! Unfortunately, it only grabbed the first few pages of comments, and the spice was only starting at that point.
A little context must go into this one. For three years now, Wix has owned DeviantArt, having acquired it from its original managers. Wix then redesigned DeviantArt to have a more modern functionality, referred to as DeviantArt Eclipse. A part of this functionality is that people on DeviantArt are (supposed to be) notified whenever someone posts a work similar to their own on any website across the internet, even on the dark web, as an originality-based precaution. As a side note, I wouldn't say DeviantArt is doing the best it has ever done, but I wouldn't call it bad, but "pessimist culture" would disagree, and there are those who say the feature I mention is irreputable.

One day, a certain someone signed up for Wix and started putting art on there instead of DeviantArt. It should be noted that you can be banned from DeviantArt but not Wix. It's not usual, but I myself demonstrate this, probably because my "ban" was circumstantial and therefore intentionally made only partial (for this reason, look up my Lemmy username on DeviantArt, I'm not forgotten), but I'm only a second person here as far as Wix is concerned. Someone deep into this "pessimist culture" (I don't know what else to call it) then noticed and made a complaint accusing me of bypassing DeviantArt's detectors using their own parent website and nobody doing anything, even "with the premium service package". I kind of laughed at this, it would be like saying you committed a bank robbery by asking to speak to the manager and then asking him nicely for all the money in the bank. You kind of have to question the ownership at that point. Needless to say the fishiest thing was the accusers.
It's a recent one, but hasn't been posted, and has spread across the internet, so if you're not a Musk fan you can look elsewhere.

Who would win in a fight, Remy or Stuart Little.

https://twitter.com/LorTomo2/status/1593043564153475075

76 comments