Trump Reflexively Asks Michael Cohen To Silence Michael Cohen
Trump Reflexively Asks Michael Cohen To Silence Michael Cohen
NEW YORK—During a brief recess from his ex-attorney’s testimony regarding hush money payments made shortly before the 2016 election, former President Donald Trump reflexively cornered Michael Cohen and asked him for help silencing Michael Cohen, courtroom sources confirmed Monday. “Listen, Micha...
Not gonna lie, this was a tasty onion.
Post 2020 vibe:
Are there any memes from the movie The Menu? That might be decent too
Delicious
At press time, sources reported Cohen had reluctantly agreed to hire someone to threaten his own family in order to ensure his cooperation.
The Onion is just on fire lately. They’re figuring out how to do satire again in the worst timeline.
The Onion is just on fire lately. They’re figuring out how to do satire again in the worst timeline.
It's actually because The Onion was sold to Jeff Lawson (founder of Twilio) at the end of April. He appointed Ben Collins, formerly a senior reporter at NBC News covering “disinformation, extremism and the internet” as the CEO. Here's what he had to say:
“My friends and I now own and run The Onion. I’ll be the CEO. We’re keeping the entire staff, bringing back The Onion News Network, and shar[ing] the wealth with staff. Basically, we’re going to let them do whatever they want. Get excited.”
Like a single piece of perfect popcorn hand delivered by an angel
How bad is it that I was absolutely going to believe this until I saw the source.
"The Onion: tragically plausible since 2016"
At press time, sources reported Cohen had reluctantly agreed to hire someone to threaten his own family in order to ensure his cooperation.
It says a lot about the state of things that my first reaction was a complete lack of surprise.
A Scanner Darkly, book and movie, really good.
Reading the dedication at the end gave me goosebumps.