It'll never fail

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That's why Cthulhu (in CoC) has an attack that "kills 1d4 investigators per turn"
- If we can give him a -3 penalty, then we'll get more investigators than we lose.
- Aha! Just make an investigator that is not an investigator!
  
  in CoC, player characters are called Investigators. So basically, 1d4 player characters die when he's nearby.
The stubbornness of RPG players commands an inspired magnitude of awe
Which is why the Reckoners had no stats in Deadlands until they got their asses throw onto Banshee.
So you're saying we can become governor of California some day?

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