17 Days In Incubator Longest Time Premature Baby Will Go Without Being Exposed To Advertising
17 Days In Incubator Longest Time Premature Baby Will Go Without Being Exposed To Advertising
NEW YORK—Describing the newborn’s stint in a neonatal intensive care unit as a brief, blissful period during which she was still beyond the reach of marketers, sources confirmed Monday that her 17 days in an incubator would be the longest period of her life in which premature baby Rosalyn Williams w...
This one is a certified banger. I am really jealous of the baby.
Capitalists sleeping on this gold mine. !
It’s to help pay for the expensive treatment. There’s a lot of risk that the baby won’t make it so the advertisers need to make sure they can recoup their losses on the ones that become financially viable.
Right, they could at least include a banner ad
SATIRE! ONION NO IT'S MEANT TO BE SATIRE!
What is satire, if not the truth turned up to 11?
How can we shape its young minds without the ads? Maybe a little tv would save this baby.
"This incubator mattress pad is brought to you by Casper mattresses. Casper mattresses was one of the earliest direct-to-consumer mattresses for new borns. They disrupted the traditional mattress purchasing process by offering online selling. They sell just one model, which means there’s no decision paralysis while shopping. With a 100-day return policy, a compact package, and no need to go to a showroom, there is plenty of incentive to try them out."
We make picking a mattress so easy it'll make you fall asleep!
Every ad I had to close out of while trying to read this only drove the point home further..
uBlock Origin. It will change the way you look at the internet.
At press time, reports confirmed the baby’s 17 days of serenity had been cut short after the walls and roof of her incubator had been sold as ad space.
Honestly, the onion is just too good. Pure gold.
They offer all sorts of formula samples at the hospital, so I think even that is a stretch...
It's not even true. If there's a medical product in eyeshot, they'll be seeing its logos
Babies can't see for shit when they're just born. Maybe the pampers logo in their diaper, but even that's a stretch.