My 3 year old has taken up parkour. How do I keep her from killing herself?
So my three year old has, since she was little, been really into jumping. I try to warn her that she could seriously injure herself, but this hasn't happened yet so she doesn't think I'm serious. But she jumps over and off anything. Sisters bunk bed to the armchair 2 meters away? No problem. Bunk bed to the floor? Sticks the landing every time. I swear my partner must have cheated on me with a f##king spider monkey.
How do I convince her to not do the jumps that could break her ankle if she lands wrong? I'm not getting through to her. I'm happy she is physically active, but she's taking the piss.
There is a certain point in a child's life where they are either going to hear it from you or hear it from a surgeon. My 11 year old had a desire to jump from high places for a time as well. He bruised his heel once and had a hard time walking for a week. Pain is a very good educator. Dissuade them from anything that may end their short life early, but if it's just going to hurt, let them go. My guidance for kids generally is to be mindful not to tear up the furniture or harm others, but if this hurts after I've warned you it's on you. Here is the first-aid kit. We ultimately got them a trampoline, which was extensively used.
Get her to a kids gym, they'll teach her how to land safely at least. I haven't done gymnastics for 30 years but when i go for a sixer i still auto roll to minimise injury.
Finding a safe outlet is great. If you've not got a kid's gym locally you can often buy the same equipment and use your own yard/house of you have room.
All that equipment will be buried under a meter of snow until April. But for now she's learning to cross country ski and soon skate. I figured that if her balance is that good, why not?
We've definitely considered a gymnastics class for her. She lands like a chimp. Ie she lands on bended knees and rolls to distribute the force. She jumps further and from higher up than her 10 year old sister. If I weren't genuinely concerned for her safety I'd just be impressed. But she definitely lands correctly already.
Sounds like she might have looked up how to land while free running. Definitely encourage safely landing and repetitive movements so her body will get used to it.
Also I'm assuming she already found out about American Ninja Warrior. I think they have a kids version.
You dont convince her to stop you encourage it. There are places you can go so she can jump to her hearts content. If you cant afford it build her a living room obstacle course with the couches and pillows. She will need to follow your rules to get all of this. Too often we kill our kids dreams with out knowing it.
Oh I'm not trying to kill her enthusiasm. I just want her to do some rudimentary risk assessment. Like "if I jump off the top of my sisters bunk bed to the other side of the room, there's a chance I'll wipe out and break my leg".
My position is that if at the end of a day your kid still has the same amount of limbs and eyes, it's fine. My kids are 8 and 10 now, they're active, and they more or less know what's dangerous and what's not, because they fell of things face-first a couple of times.
Overprotecting can also be dangerous just for development. When my daughter was like 5, she had a friend af the same age, a girl who DIDN'T LEARN HOW TO RUN, because her mom was scared for her. I'm happy we didn't go crazy about safety. Your kid wants to jump off a cupboard? You can just comment that it could be painful, and maybe show a picture of a fractured ankle x-ray.
She may jump and break her ankle (I seriously hope not) but it might happen and it won't be your fault or her fault, kids do that
I'd imagine it like driving, it's by far the most dangerous thing we do but it's necessary to live. Teach them how to drive and how to avoid danger and what to look out for and take the risk
You see, driving doesn't need to be that dangerous. While the USA has 12.9 traffic related deaths per 100k my country has 2. And it's still a good analogy because the difference lies in driver education. We have special classes to teach night driving, long distance driving, rural driving, driving on ice, how to correctly install child seats, how to safely fasten loads to the roof rack etc. And that's what I'd like in this case. To equip her with more knowledge about what can go wrong and how to avoid it.
Falling awkwardly when that little is remarkably risk free (within reason) bones and joints are bendy and mild injuries heal quickly and lessons will be learned practically.
Toddlers are exploring all boundaries and this behaviour is exploring their boundaries of physical resilience.
Let them explore, let them go until they find their limit... then explain, immediately.
Of course, this requires you make sure a serious accident can't happen, so get rid of that glass coffee table etc.
Example, my son fell off his top bunk, while clambering around like a loon, hurts arm, needs a cast for a few months. Learns to use the ladder.
Maybe you could change the message a little bit and enter deeper into her world?
We had a stage where we'd play variations on the floor is lava and set up obstacle courses for them - often just by spreading cushions around as stepping stones. Now this is probably a bit lame for your wee one but where I'm going with this is when you start including elevation (chairs or if you've got bar stools that are tall?) the pillows in the floor start to roll.
Them you join in the game as the lava crocodile and capture them any chance they're too low or make mistakes, and something is bound to happen before long...
So this has three parts to it:
it escalates their play and incorporates some pressure / chasing which is fun
it also includes you in the game making it a shared activity
it takes you away from the scolding buzz-kill parent, so your warnings might not fall on deaf ears (especially after the inevitable happens, and chances are it'll be minor in this setting too - provided you don't have glass coffee tables!)
Don't know where you're located, but there are parkour gyms popping up all over the place, and most have kids classes. They may go by ninja warrior gyms or be combined with climbing or gymnastics gyms. These gyms are often designed with kids and safety in mind, and will teach kids safe, sustainable movements
Another option is to scout a local parkour group. The one I've attended events of most in the past, SF Parkour (in the SF bay area) has events specifically for kids. You'll want to vet the groups of course and likely be present as they're not daycares, but you may be surprised how many parkourspeople are knowledgeable and mindful about safety and developing sustainable body mechanics. There are some reckless groups and members out there for sure, but most are rather cautious
Parkour is a meditative practice for most I've encountered and seen online, though that may be NorCal thing and online self-selection. Scouting some strong mentors and content from online communities that reinforce learning one's limits and safely expanding them will likely encourage her to do the same. Can't speak more highly of Raul Piscoya, the guy who runs SF parkour
If she's not gonna get seriously hurt it might be a good idea to leave her be. At that age small injuries will heal well and it's a learning experience.