I have a couple published which you can check out here
A couple of upper primary horror inspired by Goosebumps (book 3 coming soon), a Treasure Hunting Adventure (releasing shortly) and a Tassie-western novella/sort story (like 40 pages).
I went to visit nana in respite care today. The place she is is really nice and the nurses and the others there are lovely. I genuinely think it’s as nice as you can get with these kinds of things. The problem is that nana’s dementia means that she forgets why she’s there. Her short term memory is about 5 minutes long now, and every few minutes she asked me “when do I get to go home?” It broke my heart every time. She doesn’t remember what happened to put her there and she doesn’t understand. When she saw me walk into the common space she jumped up and said “you’ve come to take me home!!” It was all I could do to not cry on the spot. She’s also started reverting to being scared of my grandfather. He’s been dead for 30 years. He was a raging alcoholic and very physically and emotionally violent, but nana also gave out as much as she got back in the day and has never expressed being afraid of him before. But when I kept having to say to her “no Nan, this is your home now, remember? You’re here so that we can keep you safe” she’d just nod and go “right, to keep me safe from him he’s always so angry when he drinks.” So that’s interesting.
Anyway I took her to the pancake parlour and let her go to town and order anything she wanted and she was so stoked. She’s never as happy as she is when she’s got dessert.
I need and entire bottle of wine and a good cry now.
Before my grandpa passed, he was in hospice care (found out later that it's actually the same one my partner's mum works at, but she wasn't his nurse) and he I think suffered dementia because of the jaw cancer. And like man, that shit hurts. And you know they're not forgetting you intentionally.
Like I remember my final goodbye and I could see him trying to connect the dots on who I am. Ugh.
I'll have to join you the good cry (luckily there's no one else here in the lunch room), it never gets easier.
Nana, thankfully, still remembers who I am. There’s only been one instance where she didn’t know me, and it was because I showed up at her house with my sister and niece who she hadn’t seen for 5+ years and two unfamiliar faces threw her. I can’t take Mr Omoikiri with me to see her either because he came onto the scene too late for him to be in her long-term memory and she gets a bit uncomfortable around ‘strange’ men. She also comes out with some old lady racist stuff sometimes that she may have thought in the past, but had the filter to know to not say it. and while he just laughs it off, it’s best for everyone if he stays away. I’m certain the day will come when she doesn’t know me though.
I’m sorry for your loss too. It just sucks so much
I didn’t have a good relationship with my mother and she had a deep onset of dementia while relatively young that eventually took her motor functions and her voice.
On one of my earlier visits she was still somewhat lucid but had no speech and I had to explain to her why we had to put her into a home that she tried desperately to escape from.
When I last saw her she was just a husk of herself staring out into space with clenched fists not even recognising me.
It was very hard to see and I wish we had time to mend our relationship and I’m sure her dementia contributed to our fights.
Treasure the time you have spent and memories of her that you have.
It’s so hard. Thankfully nana is now past the point where she realises that she’s dementing. There was a while where she was really distressed because she knew she should remember how to do basic tasks and had enough of her mind still to understand what was happening to her
I work at a respite home and it's such a sad place to be because you see the elderly suffering through their dementia and other memory or physical issues. It's really sad, but it's so nice you got to take her out.
That hit me right in the gut too. This isn’t a big centre. There’s maybe 25-30 people in there all up. It’s also not a high-care one, so they’re free to roam around and do what they want and we can take them out no problem. But when I signed nana out in the log, I saw that there was maybe only 10 other instances of people taking their loved ones out. Maybe some of them can’t really go out, and maybe some family members come and sit with them instead. But for the most part it looks like they’ve just been out there and forgotten.
Dastardly Windows automatic update restarted my computer and made the bot homeless overnight. At least it was not the bot itself failing. It has now been turned off. I thought I'd shut off everything that could turn it off on me, but missed one.
I wonder what future humans (if there are any) will make of Windows updates.
I like the comment you added to bot001's posts. I was thinking of adding a random quote of the day to sydbot. Thinking is about as far as I usually get though. I'm a good thinker in that respect.
Maybe some nice new batteries, a squirt of WD40, points cleaning and a buff with a microfibre cloth will help it feel better. Self care would apply to bots too methinks.
I've been asked if I want to attend an IT security conference next week at the MCG which it comes with an MCG tour and a fine-dining lunch experience. I feel like I don't own clothes nice enough to attend something like that! I'm not fancy.
Finally had my long awaited psychiatrist appointment today and lemme just say I'm so so so relieved she turned out to be very professional and empathetic and asked lots of very very relevant questions and wasn't at any point condescending or patronising. I'm quite emotional tbh. Just want to lie down somewhere and soak up the sun but I have this very time critical government related project thing I have to go and do now and my shoulders are killing me. I will do the lie down this weekend.
Also stay inside if you manage to soak in the sun from there. Outside is cold and windy enough to offset the the warmth from the sun, not that it was that warm in it anyway.
Lying down over the weekend sounds like a great plan, I hope you manage to get your neck and shoulder sorted out.
I reckon so. Big hit to the wallet (475 - thankfully I think I'll be getting most of of it back having hit the safety net) but she is good.
Unfortunately I gotta head outside shortly for a bit of field work. But I probably could do with some fresh air. I have plenty of warm clothes on so if the sun's out I'll be fine in that sense.
Thanks. I've done it so many times now I'm a bit numb to the whole process but I'm actually feeling overwhelmed this time from feeling like I have finally got a breakthrough where everyone else has hit a wall (because I needed psychiatric assessment).
Heading to Melbourne next week. Taking the Jetstar roulette. Last time the flight was eventually cancelled at midnight and we got put up in a hotel and slept for like 4 hours before having to be up again for the earliest flight the next morning.
Definitely hoping that isn't the case this time.
I reached out to my old primary school a week or so ago about donating my books to the school library since they are the reason I am such a big reader and wanted to be a writer. They said yes and wanted me to come in for a talk but unfortunately couldn't make it work because of pupil free day on one day and specialist classes on the other. They asked if I could come for book week which I would love but probably won't be able too. I'm really sad I couldn't do it because I've really felt a connection to my school since my little one started school and I'm now studying education for a career change.
I'm still going to drop off the books and hopefully get to see what it's like inside. Last time I was in Melbourne I drove past and it's changed so so much. It's crazy.
Everythings coming up Milhouse. New job is good, exercise and money. Close enough to home and might be really close after training. aa is working. Finally got some closure on my previous shit cunts of employers and co workers, can resign and move on with life. Holiday is over and I have a new job.
Also got news my son and mum are coming down for a couple of weeks in August.
Got interviewed yesterday for a trans book and photo exhibition. So much positivity going around. Service work today, aa and my organistiion. Cook another vege stew, go for a walk, another meeting and then bed. My days are full of joy at the moment. Plus constantly playing with the cats. They are super happy at the moment. I got some treats from Aldi. They love them a bit too much but it's bringing us closer.
Exciting day trip to Northland. It has real shops, something Carlton and the cbd doesn't have.
I went by bus and that was excitement. 😬 A big speeding earthmoving truck pushed a van into our lane, evasive measures were taken.
Northland is so different to where I live. It has shops for children and men and families, homewares and variety stores, cafes that weren't just coffee shops. It's clean and quiet.
Pizza has been cooked and consumed. OMG awesomeness pizzonified. No pics, I was too busy eating. Miss Meow is very displeased, she was under the impression that pizza was a sharing food, but I would not let her snag a piece and ate the whole thing myself.
Oh my GOD. I was gonna post this bit of a rant because I couldn't find my pants. I was so annoyed and getting frustrated. I couldn't find them and I remembered wearing them Monday and put them on my bed. I even checked the laundry places.
...I washed them Monday night so they were in the hamper the whole time. I'm an idiot.
I don't think you can get an easier hot meal than hot dogs. Yep I've scraped the bottom of the barrel with lips, hips and arseholes for dinner tonight.
I wonder if there's some interesting combination to make it tasty or something. Like adding onions and mushrooms and garlic sauce or some combo you don't normally use with hotdogs.
With apologies to those whom have standard days, weekend! Four whole days without idiot manager. May they stay the fuck out of my dreams, that’s just too damn much.
With society changing away from standard working hours we really need to update terminology. We need a new term for scheduled days off, and also a term for when your days off align with the days off of people you want to spend time with. We could probably do with a term for the situation when you are unable to spend time with family and friends due to not having any overlapping time off, and for the annoying attitude of people who assume days off during the week are "holidays" and days off after night shift are open for you to do things other than sleep. Despite the number of people who proclaim we are a 24/7 society now (and they tend to be the ones arguing against penalty rates) a lot of people really don't understand anything other than standard work hours. Drive time radio hosts are my favourite - despite the fact that they are working non standard hours themselves they really go all in on the 9-5 mythology.
I feel better today. Yesterday my brain was a bit “foot to the floor on the accelerator” but today it’s much calmer. Which is strange, because I don’t think I’ve done anything different. Somethings just shifted inside me and I’m back to good again. Strange.
aaah, many swears old workplace resignation letter sent. I was super stressed right after then but and an aa friend called very soon after which was at just the right time. First time I'd wanted to drink in a month. That call, food, an anti anxiety med and some strong camomile tea and I'm deeply at ease again and feel like booze would be a very bad idea. End of an epoch of my life. I worked there for almost 17 years and they've always had shit management which really failed me when I needed their support. I expected a lot more solidarity from the staff also but received absolutley none, not even an are you ok? I'd given mine so freely and to my own detriment as the most senior member of staff. They're all on my resentment list. FUCK THEM! Their memories will fade away as I make better connections and they'll still be spineless psycophants. I deliberately avoid places I may see them because I really don't like my chances of keeping my cool around them. Ok, rant over. No stew made, but I think dinner is planned with some aa people after this evening's meeting.
end rant, thanks for reading dear DT friends.
It hurts a lot when you’ve given so much of you to a job and nobody gives a shit when you leave. I know one shouldn’t feel that way, it’s just a job, but personally I felt really upset, I try so hard. (8.5 years ….. shitty management can fuck off)
Yeah I was angry bitter and disappointed that people I actually trusted as friends basically deserted me when I needed them most. The only people who could really understand why I was so let down by management, because they have the same shit management and unsafe workplace. This was the final nail though, I have let it all go. Harbouring resentments and seeking revenge or being litigant destroys my chance of helping those sick people be better to the next person they have the chance to desert or lie about being supportive to.
I have to work on bettering myself and they have to be honest with themselves before they'd accept my support anyway. A lot of people would rather bitch than try and change the status quo. This is true in every facet of society.
It’s the water not the gas canister, but point taken. Was rather worried. We’ve had burst pipes three times in this house, so the possibility of it being something non trivial was there.
In today's defiant act of self inflicted financial sabotage I'm getting 3 potato cakes @ $2.50 a pop when I go to the shops later. Tum tum can do this.. it has to.
They're newish and it's daylight robbery but they've lengthened their trading hours and are open every day now so seeing that viability warms the icy cockles of my heart.
You need to source these mate Potato cakes. They have them at Tasman Meats. There's another one that you can get at Tasman Meats but I can't think of the name of them. They are big potato cakes.
Had a couple site servers go offline yesterday, in both cases it's the modems. One's a hard DUP fail (meaning it's the NBNco infrastructure in the pit outside), the other is the modem just straight up offline in the aussie broadband diagnostics. So i have nbnco going out today to repair one abd waiting on site to reboot the modem at the other. Simples, right?
Nope, $boss is already rabbiting on about replacing the servers and trying to light a fire under my arse screaming about random shit that doesn't even goddamn apply once actual diagnostics are run on the issues to hand.
Those sting. I worked at a place that didn't actually tax our allowances (living away and travel).....and I was working on site for like 9 months. The cash was great. The ATO bill wasn't.
I finally got paid, yay! And I sent my partner the money that I owe them from last October. It's a lot of money and goes over the savings budget, but it was only an extra $40 or so, and I'd rather it out of the way than still looming.
I wish it was the weekend already, I’m sick of work today, my boss is on holidays and someone has decided to change up one of the aspects of my job so that what used to take me about 45 minutes, took me 2 and a half hours today. Hopefully it will be quicker tomorrow, but I keep thinking about the fact that I usually have Fridays off and have to go in just to get frustrated.
I knew going back to the office would make me tired but holy shit it feels like my bones have turned lead in my sleep. I feel exhausted and very cranky, which is not ideal because cranky me is the single worst person I know.
I’m still
Shocked at much much of an affect it has on my sensory and nervous systems. Came home from the office yesterday, fed the dog and went to bed. Slept 13 hrs.
After much procrastination I took the first step in my plan to make instructional videos by doing a short video of how to darn a sock. I really don't sound like I think I do when recorded, it is very odd. I also put some apps on my phone to filter for colour blindness visibility, it was a bit tricky to find colour combinations that would work well and provide good contrast for different types of colour blindness.
I think I've got the basics down about how to use the editing software, but managed to delete a section in the middle (fortunately not an important bit). I also need to work on keeping what I am doing centred when filming, I kept moving my work into the wrong spot.
Overall, lots of areas to improve on but I'm fairly happy with it for a first effort.
have decided to take tomorrow off and go somewhere for the weekend. excluding Daylesford (its lovely but I go there all the time), where's a nice regional town for me to visit this weekend?
edit: someone mentioned wandi in a different thread, strong contender
Forrest us a good shout - I should have noted in my post that we have a place in Lorne, so we are often in that part of the state. I absolutely love Lake Elizabeth - its such a nice walk in, and so pretty! I dont often see platypus, though (I know they're there, I just never see them!)
Pondering buying an old car in case I have to drive into the city - can’t park a large car to save myself. How many km is too many ? Looking at $5k or less. No Uber or taxi where I live. Was $145 to book a private car to get into the cbd a few weeks ago. (Was emergency medical)
I'd look for an old Japanese beater. Was in a pinch a couple of years back and bought an '04 Hyundai Acccent for $4k with 200k on the ODO and that thing is still putting along. I think it's shat out twice since I've had it, one was me being lazy changing the oil (I do it myself), and the other time it was the battery.
It's from a dessert shop in the CBD called Dessert Story. They have a special machine, and it's creamy and textured almost like melty fabric strands idk how to describe it. The one I had today was topped with chopped peanuts and black sesame and was divine
Have a friend going to Olinda tomorrow, might suddenly become ill and go with. Had an incident at work when I started earlier this arvo and it's extremely soured my already diminishing taste for the place.
Met this super cute woman at a meet up tonight and just really couldn't figure out, is she gay, bi or does she just hang around queer people and is just a Melbourne hipster? All I do know is that I thought she was really cute and pretty. Lol.
I have now spent way too long learning to do captions for YouTube videos. Then I discovered that the default position for them blocks the video of what I am doing. After much investigation I have discovered that you can drag the subtitles where you want them when you watch, unless you are using the app. Which of coarse automatically opens when you watch a video. I have now disabled the app, as I apparently can't delete it, and now videos are opening in the browser. It is frustrating how many companies put out apps with extremely limited features and then push everything to open in them. If I wanted to use the blasted app I wouldn't be in my browser.
The entire Sydney Road area up and down is farked up. Narrow, old, janky-ass roads and footpaths. Roads narrow and tight, with parking, bikes, trams, and pedestrians smushed in with cars trying to use it as an arterial road. Which it is, but's it's fucking old and bad. Harrowing to drive in and around.
I finally booked in for an eye appointment. I hope I don't need new glasses, but I hope I can get my new ones cleaned up or something (though I might need to pay for new glass because I think one lens has a scratch).
My left rear car tyre has a slow leak and I just can't right now. I pumped it up last night, it was down to like 14psi.. I'd pumped it up 3 weeks ago and it was down to about 17psi then. Just.. urgh.
I've just been going year by year on my Google Timeline to see how far I've travelled each year. I know some people find this sort of thing creepy that your phone keeps a record of places you've been, but I find it really useful and valuable.
2020 the furthest place I went to was Albury and that wasn't until December. It's almost as if something happened that year that kept me at home. 2016 the furthest was Sydney but every other year since it has been tracking me (2012 when I moved from iPhone to Android) I've managed to get up to Queensland or travel internationally, so I'm doing alright.
If anyone is taking a look at theirs.. check out August 2020. I actually didn't go beyond our mandated 5km limit the entire month! I went to Costco x 1, Woolworths x 1, Pizza Hut x 1, KFC x 1 and my apartment for the entire rest of the month!
PTV website says to go to the Art's Centre to get a bus to Moorabbin, but then I keep getting told by them to take the Sandringham train to Brighton beach and take a bus from there to Moorabbin. That actually adds an extra 15-20 minutes to my travel rather than an express bus to Moorabbin from Art's Centre.
Anyone know why they keep telling us to go Sandringham line instead? Is the Art's Centre bus not actually running?
Could be a connecting line? I remember busses would go to Sandringham instead of direct to the city. The Pakenham/Cranbourne line is going to Burnley instead of into the city.
For anyone still using Reddit, are you getting a weird thing with the Popular feed where you click on a post and it ‘opens’ two or three posts and then to get back to the Popular feed you have to go back 2-3 times?
No, but the way I do it, is I go through /popular and look at whatever I'm interested in. If I'm not interested, I hide it. If it's a picture, I look at it, then hide it. Text post? Read it, then hide it. If it's something I want to read later, I open it in a tab, open the comments in a tab, then hide the submission. I go through the whole front page like this in about 30 minutes.
Then, later, when I check Reddit again, about 50-60 percent of what is on /popular is stuff that I saw and hid earlier in the day. It's super annoying that I'm not being served fresh content throughout the day when I've specifically hidden the other stuff I don't want them to show me.
Australians cannot comprehend keep left unless overtaking (and their attitudes are they absolutely do not give a single fuck about other drivers) so I can't see this making any difference except potentially fining people who have enough of sitting behind right-lane hogs and go around them on the left, like I end up having to do multiple times on semi regular journeys to the outer western suburbs. I've actually spoken to someone before who said when they get on the highway they'll just go straight over to the right lane because it's "easier". I see truck drivers doing the same thing on places like the Westgate. Not overtaking anyone.. they just want to be in the right lane.
Nothing short of an actual crackdown on keep right unless overtaking will change this behaviour in my opinion. These people need to be pulled over, shot, have their cars crushed and their families sent a fine.
These people need to be pulled over, shot, have their cars crushed and their families sent a fine.
You have thirty minutes to move your family. You have ten minutes. Your family has been impounded. Your family has been crushed into a cube. You have thirty minutes to move your cube.
A little help please....so it looks like the last time I got the energy rebate was September last year and I have not kept up on what is available since then. Have I missed some deadlines on applying for additional payments? What should I do?
OK, this is just screwed up. I scored a perfect round, but today’s puzzle shows how inconsistent this game is.
The spoiler contains spoilers, so don’t click it if you’re going to try your luck in the game.
Tonga is closer to New Zealand than two of the countries included as neighbours. Why does it treat Norfolk Island as a neighbour when it’s an Australian external territory? And why does the game usually only consider nearby neighbours separated by water when the country has no land borders at all? Like when it was Italy, they didn’t include Tunisia or Albania as neighbours, despite both being far closer than any of NZ’s neighbours.