lady_scarecrow (she/her) @lemmy.blahaj.zone Trans woman and amateur writer. Tumblr: ladyscarecrow My free novel: https://archive.org/details/book_20240528
Quickly going through the modlog of that community I've found these three comments that were removed for no other reason than they didn't align with what some mod thinks, along with a lot of people who were banned with the reason "liberal".
I don't even agree with these comments, but that doesn't matter. You're willing to host that community to give them a voice, while the mods stifle dissent and ban anyone who disagrees.
The ones who are more on the left are exactly the ones who are less inclined to vote, so yes.
I fail to see how that community is pushing back against any system by repeating the same tired talking points that dissuade people from voting.
I don't think there were any bad intentions on OP's end, but the highlighted claim that a person is female and therefore has this or that genitalia is indeed transphobic.
Someone's probably going to show up and say "but it says 'female', not 'woman'!" Well, "female" as an adjective referring to people already means woman. A female doctor is a doctor who is a woman. And "female" as a noun (e.g., "the females") is a terrible way to refer to people, to begin with.
[OC] The cold of this world
I strip by the mirror, and mindlessly stare. Defenseless -- as always, but now I'm aware. The wind's never late; I have to keep steady. The cold of this world won't wait 'till you're ready.
I run to the shower. My favorite place. The droplets are warm -- they run through my face, My shoulders relax, the steam fills the air. The cold of this world won't bother me there...
Away from the wind, but not from my brain, Which echoes my worries wherever I'm in. Anxiety blossoms, and grows unrestrained. The cold of this world is born from within.
At last the world calls. Which facts will unfold? Which one of my fears reality holds? I'm not ready. No one is. I have to be bold. The cold of this world. I must face the cold.
saying gender is not a construct is a strong/radical statement in the context of theory
To be clear, I'm saying gender identity isn't a social construct (gender roles definitely are). And that's hardly a radical statement given that there is a genetic factor to being trans, as evidenced by e.g. twin studies like this one which found a much higher amount of cases where both twins are trans among identical twins (who have the same genetic code) than non-identical twins. Also, like I mentioned before, a lot of trans people feel considerable relief to their own gender dysphoria upon seeking hormone therapy and gender-affirming surgeries, which is quite hard to explain on a social basis.
I can see why this idea would seem appealing to agender people. But that's taking one's personal case and turning it into a statement about gender as a whole. Gender having a biological component isn't at odds with agender or NB people, but claiming gender is socially constructed is indeed problematic, like I said before.
The rationale that many people follow is that if gender is socially constructed, it can be socially changed as well (through conversion therapy) to make your kid align with their assigned gender at birth, which doesn't work in reality.
I'll just copy-paste what I said last time:
The idea that gender is entirely socially constructed is easily the greatest misconception about gender that gets repeated time and again – almost always by cis people, who never think too much about it because they’ve never had to reconsider their own gender.
Gender roles and gender stereotypes really are socially constructed, like the idea that some clothes are feminine and others are masculine, just to name one example. Gender identity, however, is not. If that was true, like the previous commenter was saying, conversion therapy for trans people would work, when it’s been shown it absolutely doesn’t. Gender dysphoria isn’t a social construct either. Many trans people see their own lives improve considerably after taking HRT (hormone therapy) and having gender-affirming surgeries – how can that be explained socially? Also, we know there is a genetic component to being trans as well, because of twin studies. All of which shows there really is a biological component to gender – just not in the “gender = genitals” way that transphobes think.
I bet the guy wasn't sober when he did that. He probably still thinks that way -- alcohol doesn't make people lie, it makes them far too honest -- but realized the next day that the way he had acted was screwed up.
I don’t want to come out to people, telling them that I feel like a woman, when I look and sound like a man.
I understand where that comes from, and I'd be lying if I said I didn't think the same way when I started transitioning. I pretty much never corrected people when they misgendered me, because I didn't want to get in their way. I felt as if I hadn't earned being a woman yet. Now I understand that gender isn't something you earn. You deserve being treated for who you are, despite how you look or sound like.
I’ve been on HRT for 7 months or so, and I just don’t look feminine.
HRT is basically puberty 2.0, and puberty takes many, many years to complete. I know how frustrating it is to wait for the changes, but that should also give you hope. Even if you don't like how you look now, that can and probably will change over the years.
That phrase comes from people who are either stuck in the closet, or in denial about their own sexuality. It is just one of the many byproducts of a society that still insists on considering that being straight is the only "normal" way of being.
For the last time, girls don't do this stuff for attention. People keep saying that because they don't take sapphic relationships seriously.
Now it's more important than ever to go. We need to show the transphobes and homophobes out there that we LGBTQ+ people and our allies are far more numerous than they think.
Thanks a lot! Yes, a lot of what I've written about were things I've personally been through, or experiences I've heard from other trans people. I've also wanted to have several trans women in the book precisely so I could cover a lot of different stories. Also, the mares thing was inspired by conjugated estrogens that people used as HRT in the past.
As for the ending, it's supposed to catch you off-guard, so I'm glad I managed to pull that off lol. You spend most of the book not knowing much about Julia, up until the very end, and then it becomes clear why she acted the way she did throughout the whole book.
Here's a free book full of transfem characters for you
The witches of Galree: A short fiction novel by Emily M. Lovelace, also known as Lady Scarecrow.
So, I got fed up with waiting for the review and decided to just upload this book to archive.org.
This is a short-ish (80 pages) novel I wrote some time ago. It's quite different from the poems I've been sharing so far, but I hope you'll enjoy it as well. It was mostly born out of wanting to see more stories of (and by) trans women like me.
The story is called "The witches of Galree" and it's set in medieval times, where a famous sword fighter, who's going through a crisis despite having an objectively good life, meets a group of trans witches who learned how to create a feminizing potion. Our protagonist sees some hope of answering his existential questions by seeking advice with their leader, Julia, a wise but enigmatic woman, who agrees to help while warning that the path of self-discovery is never an easy one.
It should be noted that the characters suffer a fair amount of prejudice in the story, so this is not necessarily an easy read.
It's depressing that the original one was changed in the first place -- our existence can't even be acknowledged in a video game without people collectively freaking out... Well, at least they fixed it now.
The new mask [CW: transphobia]
I cover my face before stepping outside, And don't say a word, so my voice won't be pried. I try to blend in, and pray they can't tell -- As if I'm a thief who escaped from her cell. My old mask was blue. I'm glad that it fell. My new mask is pink. I still need to hide.
From closet to stealth Does no good to your health. For people like me, this country looks bleak; If others could see, they'd just see a freak. My new mask is pink. It does make me think. My old mask was blue. What else could I do?
One day they won't tell just by looking at me, But that doesn't mean that I'm finally free. My new mask will then be etched to my face: They'll give me a past that never took place. My old mask was blue. A terrible guise. My new mask is pink. The mask is in their eyes.
-- Lady Scarecrow
The past I've never had
cross-posted from: https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/post/12099240
> I can't help but think at night > Of that which never was, but might. > > I've faced the demons deep inside > And found the answers that they hide. > But if I'd known it all back then, > Just think how much it could've changed... > > It took so long to find the way > That most are trailing every day, > And now they seem so far ahead. > I miss the past I've never had, > Where all I took so long to see > Were always clear, and I'd be free. > > How can I catch up with the rest? > How can I make up for the past? > Is it too late to change my fate? > Have I missed the train of luck? > Has life gone by while I was stuck? > > -- Lady Scarecrow
The past I've never had
I can't help but think at night Of that which never was, but might.
I've faced the demons deep inside And found the answers that they hide. But if I'd known it all back then, Just think how much it could've changed...
It took so long to find the way That most are trailing every day, And now they seem so far ahead. I miss the past I've never had, Where all I took so long to see Were always clear, and I'd be free.
How can I catch up with the rest? How can I make up for the past? Is it too late to change my fate? Have I missed the train of luck? Has life gone by while I was stuck?
-- Lady Scarecrow
A poem I wrote as an egg, and in love with a straight guy.
Question
A question fills my head. Were I a girl instead -- Same book, but different cover -- Would you become my lover? Or would we still be friends?
Now, I ask: don't get me wrong. I love our friendship, and it's strong. I love it when I make you smile, Even for a little while. I love it when I'm at your side. Our conversations make my day. And nothing makes me feel more pride Than impressing you some way.
Now, I wonder: can you tell? How you make me feel so well? That this smile is just for you? And if you knew, then what you'd do?
Now, I know that you are straight. And we're both guys, so we won't date. So a question fills my head. Were I a girl instead...
________________________________________________ Note: I wrote this poem before realizing I'm a trans woman, which is why I'm calling myself a guy in there, but I'm absolutely not one. I have since learned that gender isn't just a matter of a "different cover" -- it's definitely part of the book.
-- Lady Scarecrow
The mask [CW: transphobia]
I don't know why I keep this mask. It doesn't fit me -- it never has. And now I've figured out this mess, It seems to fit me even less. I would much rather wear a dress...
But where I'm from, the risk's too high. When I still look like a guy (In many ways -- I hate them all), If I step outside the door With these clothes that I adore, What sort of danger would I call?
But I can't waste my life away And live a lie until the day I'll get to look a certain way.
In the end, it's up to me To find the courage that I need And be the girl I wish to be.
-- Lady Scarecrow
A poem about gender roles I wrote as an egg.
Like a girl
From the beginning, girls and boys Are raised in wildly different ways: We're meant to play with different toys, We're shamed or praised for equal traits.
Though I've been groomed to be a man, Deep down, our nature can't be changed. They hope I'm careless and brave, and aggressive and bold, and well-spoken and suave, and detached, even cold.
But I'm sensitive and frail. I'm not an alpha male. Whenever I try it, I hopelessly fail.
Girls have plenty they can wear Cute or stylish -- it's all there! A fine dress, and heads are turned; A cute skirt, their frown's adjourned. The gray manhood can't compare, And it frankly isn't fair...
I can't think of a plan For what's bound to unfurl. They're expecting a man, Yet I think like a girl.
___________________________________________________ Note: I've written this poem before realizing I'm a trans woman. I have since learned there's nothing wrong with manhood -- the problem was that I'm not a man, myself.
-- Lady Scarecrow
How to have spaces in the beginning of the line?
I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask, but here goes. If I add spaces to the beginning of a line,
the text is rendered like this.
Is there a way to have actual spaces in the beginning of a line?
Mirror on the wall [CW: Dysphoria]
Mirror, mirror on the wall, Do I see myself at all?
Why's this beard so thick and vast In my image that you cast? Why's there so much body hair? And the breasts that I should bear? And these arms so far from slender? Where's the sight of my true gender?
Mirror, mirror on the wall, What I've seen has made me crawl.
All I wish you'd show to me Is the woman I can't see. Not the fairest of them all, For whom anyone would fall, Nor a pretty one, indeed. Just a woman's all I plead.
Mirror, mirror on the wall, I can't blame you, after all. You're a physical device Meant to show what's in their eyes.
Mirror, mirror on the wall. You can't hear me as I call. But I'll ask you anyway: Will you show myself one day?
-- Lady Scarecrow
The ghost
When I was born, so was a ghost. When anyone would look at me, It was the ghost they'd really see.
I was a child, and couldn't tell. I thought I was that ghost as well. But, slowly, truth would start to show. And when at last I let them know...
...They turned their heads and sought the ghost. The ghost was all they wished to see. The ghost was who they loved the most. The ghost of who they thought me to be.
It's been so long, and still they yearn What's only lived inside their minds. I wonder if they'll ever learn That while they seek what none can find, And fail to let me into their hearts, We both end hurt, and drift apart.
-- Lady Scarecrow
A poem I wrote back when I was in the closet.
The wait
Now I finally see There's a woman in me.
And the void in my heart That would never depart, And the pain that would start Without reason at sight -- All's explained, and alright. And the future looks bright.
But, for now, that's my fate: I must keep it inside. My most beautiful side, Which has blossomed so late, I'm now struggling to hide. For how long must I wait?
To be me, To be free, To pursuit my own glee? Oh, how long will it be?
The path that lies ahead Is harsh and filled with dread, But my resolve won't wane: I'd gladly rush, instead. But life's forced me to refrain And waste this time I won't regain.
Will this new life compensate All the time I'll have to wait?
-- Lady Scarecrow
Hello everyone
I finally decided to make an account after lurking so long. Hi everyone. I'm a trans woman, 2-3 years into my transition, and during (and after) the process of figuring it out, I've written several poems, to try and get in touch with my feelings. I think now's a good time to share them, and I believe many people in here will relate to them as well. I was thinking of posting them from time to time to [email protected] unless someone else has a better idea.