Police are like a box of chocolates

True. But at the same time if life is also like a box of chocolates I must be a dog because this shit is killing me.

DOJ: Police Shooting Family Dogs has Become ‘Epidemic’

Cops in this country kill so many dogs each year that a specialist at the Department of Justice’s (“DOJ”) community-oriented program services office says it has become an “epidemic.” The DOJ estimates that around 25 to 30 dogs are killed by cops every day, with some numbers as high as 10,000 per year. The totals could, in fact, be higher, since most police agencies do not formally track officer-involved shootings involving animals.

I laughed too hard at this. Funny because it’s true and that sucks.

I had the showerthought that Gump said "you never know what you're gonna get" because he was illiterate and couldn't read the map.

Listen if you want your dog dead just lemme know, I know a guy who is really good with this sort of thing but he's only available for a few weeks before he becomes the health and human services secretary.