So, I decided to go check AEWs merch, and see if there's anything that caught my eye. First, I decided to check their clearance section. Despite running a sitewide no coupon needed black friday sale, and despite me STARTING in the clearance section, I found a BCC design that I thought was hilarious looking, and so I added it to my cart.

35% off something that was already in the clearance section. It's just a T-Shirt. Take a guess at how much it cost.

jeapordy theme

Did you guess $48? I'm unclear if that was with or without shipping. I'm sure it told me, but I wasn't going to pay $48 for a god damned T-Shirt.

But then I started looking around the rest of the T-Shirts. Awful. Truely awful designs. So I thought "Well, ,maybe that's why all this shit is being discontinued. Let's take a look in their normal section"

This time I started with Hoodies. Nope. The designs all look exactly like one guy who's bad at visual design, created ALL of these.

I mean, take a look at this one

I want you to look at this hoodie from the perspective of "I'm going to buy this hoodie, and wear it, in public, as a thing that other people will see me wearing."

95% of people out there in the world don't watch pro-wrestling! And of the 5% that do, only a small fraction watch AEW. They're averaging about 4,000 people per arena per show. I live in a city with 350,000 people in the city itself, but if you include the greater area it's closer to 1 million with surrounding areas. So within a 1 hour drive of downtown Cleveland, 1 million people COULD show up to a show. They had a show here Oct 30th for dynamite. From what I read, less than 3,000 people showed up.

So that means, in this area, if I wore THAT hoodie, only an average of 3-5k people, in a city of 350,000 would get it. Good design relies on the idea of being good even if you've never seen the reference product. Even if you have no idea what AEW is, you can look at it, and say "Oh, THAT'S cool!"

What they have instead is a bunch of products that looks like one single dork designed ALL of it, in the exact same style, and it's all just awful. Taz is employed there. He used to do ECWs merch design in the 90s. He's mediocre at commentary, but I NEVER heard anybody say that old ECW shirts looked like shit. People even replicate the style in parodies/tributes with their own merch. I have an "E C F'N 3" shirt, with the same style/font as the "E C F'N W" shirt. Looks awesome, even if EC3 is irrelevant these days.

My god, if Tony Khan is supposedly such a fan of pro wrestling at it's core, he certainly doesn't seem to have a grasp on how any of it works. Like if we never saw TKs face, and just was told someone named TK is running AEW, you could convince me it's some 12 year old, and it would fully make sense. I'd have no problem being convinced of that. Other than the lack of sexuality, because a 12 year old would be in puberty, and AEW doesn't seem like it's being run by someone obsessed with boobies. Outside of that, the creative decisions DO seem like some random 12 year old saying "YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE COOL??? IF WE PUT A NEEDLE IN A GUYS MOUTH, AND COMMITTED MURDER ON TV OVER AND OVER AND OVER!!! AND ALL THE MERCH CAN LOOK LIKE EARLY 90S WWF MERCH, EXCEPT WITHOUT ANY PERSONALITY, AND THEN....AND THEN....AND THEN....."

Meanwhile you're just rolling your eyes wondering why you can't find a wrestling brand to suit your tastes.

WWE is just morally corrupt on every level.

AEW is seemingly run by a 45 year old 12 year old.

TNA......eh, maybe I should give them another go. 10 years ago it was just laughably bad.

ROH is just AEW version of WWF Metal or WWF Jakked.

MLW just doesn't have an easy way for me to access them.

It's like I enjoy watching wrestling for the first 30 minutes......and then it just sloggs on, because there's a bunch of OTHER stuff that pads the run time. I just want to grab TKs shoulders and shake him while yelling STOP BOOKING FOR AN AUDIENCE OF ONE!!! YOU'VE LOST YOUR AUDIENCE!!!! STOP IT!!!!

On the one hand, fuck the Paul brothers.

On the other hand, it WOULD be satisfying to knock his ass out.

So I was thinking about how absolutely terrible this planet is right now. And now the republicans control everything. It's going to get soooooo much worse.

And as I thought about ways to make life better, I hit a roadblock. Every idea I had went like this:

"Oh, we could start doing this, and then this and this would be like this......oh.....but then republicans will just do that and that and that, and the whole thing is ruined."

And now repeat that same formula for every idea I came up with. So I came to a new conclusion. If we're going to beat them, we're going to have to beat them at their own game.

We're going to have to take their ideas, that we KNOW are bad ideas, and do them waaaaaaaaaay farther than they intended. We're going to have to start doing things we know will turn America into a third world country.

We're going to have to do things that make evdn republicans say "wait, no.....thats TOO much!!!"

Now back in the 60s, corporate america tried painting hippies as some evil menace to society who contributes nothjng to their community, while being leeches.

So I say, we go full force the opposite way. We go out into the streets with bats and chains, and grab old ladies, and beat them until they add $40,000 worth of goods to their cart on amazon.

They want us to spend spend spend, well we will pick one company, one evil company that does not give two shits about the planet or humans, and we FORCE people to spend 3X their life savings, and go into debt, and we go into debt too, and this one company has 100% of the nations total economy. I nominate nestle. They clearly don't give a fuck.

Now ladies, you've seen how republicans want to take away your right to an abortion. So lets go the other direction HARD. Instead of fighting for abortions, women will now rape men. I want to see swarms of women hunting the streets, and seeking out semen to have more babies than would ever even be feasible. We're going to get the scientists together on this. It's technically possible to get pregnant with 6 kids at once. It's highly rare, but it does happen. Like 0.000001% chance. We're going to make that 100% chance. Every pregnancy will now result in a minimum of 6 kids, every 9 months. And the day you can walk again, you're getting pregnant again with another 6 kids. We'll start impregnating women at 12 years old, and not stop until they die......which based on how worn their bodies will be, might be as early as 23. I want to see each woman pumping out hundreds of kids in her lifetime.

And if a man tries to refuse to have sex, or can't produce semen for any reason, we chop off his dick! No recreational sex. Sex is to happen all day every day with every not-pregnant woman. Every man will have hundreds of kids he's never met, and had to pay child support on.

Now all these kids will create a new industry for things like childcare, and clothing and healthcare......none of which we'll spend a dime on. Remember, only nestle. All hail nestle!

So all these kids will be hungry, and dirty, and diseased, and probably in pain. That's how they'll grow up. And they'll repeat the process too!

Murder is now legal. Go nuts!

Now as far as global warming goes, lets make everybody homeless, and every building burned. Lets burn our homes. Lets burn everybodies homes. Lets burn the businesses, the city hall, the airports, the oil refineries. Lets burn everything. Set the whole country on fire.

Now this country faces a gun problem, and that gun problem is there simply isn't enough guns. We need to have every American with no less that 56 guns. EVERY American. Old Americans, young Americans, toddlers, the blind, every single person should have all the guns.

Lets solve the illegal alien border crossing problem by making Mexico with its cartel crime ruled landscape seem like a paradise. Make Americans the illegal aliens in Mexico.

No more dogs. Dogs are banned in America. I don't want them suffering in this land we're going to create. Canada, you're going to get some dogs.

We're bringing back slavery. Not just black people this time, but ALL Americans. We're all slaves now. Being whipped by nestle.

And hey, we're always open to new ways to destroy our country. We'll have a suggestion box.

How does this help fix the republican problem? Oh, fuck......welp. Too late now.

So I'm playing Supermarket simulator. And if you notice TCG Simulator looks VERY similar. That's because it uses the same assets. It looks like it's actually the same shop location, on the same street. But in one game, it's a supermarket, and in another game, it's a card game similator.

But if you look, the neighborhood outside of your walls of your shop all looks very dead. Like you're in a movie set, where the rest of the town is actually just wooden building backdrops.

So I figure, what if each "shop" could be a real shop? You play online, and when you log on, your shop has an individual save data. It gets played on a server, and each server has a different set of shops.

So if you're a retro game shop, you're playing in the lot of land number 14. So when you log on, you're looking for a server that doesn't have anyone playing on land lot 14. That's the retro game shop.

When you log on, you can't have infinate time, since time needs to always be moving for everybody else at the same pace......but time also doesn't stop at 9pm, and the deliveries don't stop either. So at 9pm-8am, you restock your shelves. You order backstock for your storage room.

And the shop right next to your retro games shop? Maybe that's the supermarket. That's land plot 13. And you can go into the supermarket, and you can buy things. Just like real life people can come into your retro games shop and buy things.

There's also NPCs obviously, who would be the bulk of the customers.

But the neighborhood would actually look busy, and alive rather than one guy hanging out on a movie set.

And so, you could play supermarket simulator, and someone else could play TCG simulator, and someone else could play gas station simulator, and someone else could play retro games shop simulator, and when you you play online, you're all on the same server, on the same street, and there could be an actual economy. Customers come in, spend their money on you, you spend some of your money at the gas station. There could be a wholesale simulator, where you play the shop the other shops are ordering from on the market. So like when you order furnature, or things to stock your shop, they have to be in stock at the wholesale simulator. Which means the guy who plays that role, affects ALL the stores on the server. Because if he just lets shit go out of stock, you use the competitor, which is automated, and always in stock, but at higher prices.

Imagine if Linus Torvalds and Bill Gates had a leaked sex tape hit the market! Who would be fucking who? Or would it be like a 69 situation?

Yes. I did just put that image in your head.

Everybody always presents laundromats in tv shows and movies as this sexy place where you meet horny singles who aren't wearing underwear because it's in the wash.

But in real life, that just isn't true. The laundromat has angry people who don't want to be there, and nobody EVER has sex, or takes their clothes off.

So why are laundromats always presented like that?

"Heeeeey, so listen. Last night, when we had sex, and I started screaming bloody murder, began clutching the sheets, crying, and trying to violently kick you away? That's because you put it in the wrong hole!"

"Oh. I thought my penis was just big enough that you started flailing around and kicking. You were screaming take it out, it hurts, take it out, it's too big. So naturally I assumed that I am the ultimate man."

"No, in fact you made my anus bleed. You literally ripped the skin on my inside."

"Aw geez, oh man! That's awful......but you know what that means, right?"

"That tampons will now go in 2 holes?"

"No. It means tonight when we try that, I'll use lube, but I also won't have to wear a condom."

"We're not trying that ever again........except on your birthday."

So in this URL, you can see the 2020 lines for how North Carolina voted. If that's total counted votes after it was all over, then this page will be not so useful until all the 2024 votes are counted.

However, if it ONLY shows early/mail-in votes, then we're in trouble. On almost every state I click the democrats have NOT reached their 2020 numbers, while the republicans are close to their 2020 numbers. In some cases surpassing 2020 numbers slightly.

The context relies heavily on what those 2020 ticks are measuring. Total votes? Or only Early/Mail-in votes?

AND HIS NAME NAME IS JOOOHHHHNNNNN CEEEEEEENNNNNAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

Wait, is this 2024? Or 2044? SHIT! Wrong year. Wait, so I forget......was trump in 2024 president while in jail? Or was that after the election? Oh, right. I forgot about Joe Biden. Everybody forgot he was president.

Soooooooo, yeah. Buckle up. The 2024 election was just so soooooooooooo stupid! That was the one where trump was talking about Ohioians eating cats, and then going to get press photos working at mcdonalds, and then he gave that microphone a blowjob, and then on election day he called the election rigged before the polls even opened for the day. Then those nude photos of him leaked, with him being face-sat by that Cats broadway acress in full costume, but somehow still nude.......HE'S EATING THE PUSSYCAT!!!

Don't worry, the future is much better. 2044 election is John Cena vs Dwayne The Rock Johnson. The debates are all AI. This is 1000% better than 2024.

Well.......bye. Have fun with your covid post-years.

Every year, we all have to sit there in the chair, gathered by friends and family, as they all sing a song that a stopwatch will tell you lasted 30 seconds, but feels like HOURS.

And the entire time, you're just sitting there like "I'm very aware of my hands right now......where do I put them? What am I supposed to do with my hands right now??? I feel like everyone is judging me for using my hands incorrectly right now......"

And then, your friends birthday is next month, and you have to pretend you're actually singing this song. In reality it's more like a vaguely melodic mumble. Then everyone gets the timing of the name wrong, as if the whole room is remembering their friends name after a momentary lapse of dementia.

>"Happy Birthday to........Todd......"

And finally the song is over, and you then spit all over a cake to blow out a cake, that has for some reason been set on fire.

I mean seriously. It doesn't work like this for ANY OTHER EVENT. Even the 4th of July, which is known for drunk uncles blowing their fingers off playing with explosives doesn't have this shit. Nobody on 4th of July is like "Here's your hot dogs.....I took them off the grill, put them in a bun, squirted some mustard and ketchup on them......and then I set them on fire. That's your problem now. You deal with the fire. Spit on everybodies food, and then distribute it by incorrectly guessing how much everyone wants. Be sure to give the fat guy the tiniest portion possible. He doesn't need the extra portions, clearly."

And WHY do we do all this shit to each other? I don't know a single person who enjoys these traditions no matter which side of the candle you're on.

I'm just glad MY family doesn't do the other part, where everybody gives you a spanking. No, please, mom, do NOT engage in sexual fetishes with your adult son! And thankfully my family never has done that. That would be WEIRD.

Ok, so NASA needs to buy a construction company. Then, we get a space rocket, fill it with construction materials. Fill it with guys who work in construction. Then they build as much of a warehouse as they can before their oxygen tanks run out. Then they come back to earth. Replace the oxygen tanks, and send another rocket with more construction materials, and keep building that warehouse.

Then keep doing that until they're done building the warehouse. Now, the next trip there they can ship them with tons of oxygen tanks instead of construction materials.

So now they can stay up there longer than a few days. Now they can ship another rocket with construction materials, and food, and supplies.

And when it gets there, now we have a warehouse to store all of it. And now they can start building houses. And they can bring plants to create oxygen. Bring some trees to plant.

Now you have roads, and houses, and empty communities. So if you don't like earth, you can leave.

...........I just need to figure out a way to create water on the moon.

So the supreme court already ruled the president cannot be held accountable for anyone they kill.

The vice president becomes the president instantly if the president dies.

What is preventing any vice president from waiting until day 1 of their parties presidency, and then murdering the president? And then instantly pardoning themself?

Back when I could use twitch I would find smaller streamers, and when they would name their animals I'd say "NAME YOUR (animal) BORT!!!"

Not once in 3 years of doing that has one single streamer gotten the reference. I've gotten several animals named Bort.

But they always laugh and say "Why Bort??? That's a weird name...."

Then I tell them I named my son Bort. Bort is a strong name!

Sometimes other chatters will play along and say "I also named my son Bort."

And the streamer NEVER gets it.

Ok, so it's about a woman in her late 20s, who starts hearing demonic voices. They don't tell her to kill anyone. They just sort of live in her head, tormenting her emotionally.

They say they're someone who she used to know. But because of her, this person committed suicide. So now their spirit lives on in her head.

So she's trying to work her office job, as this voice is just like "Ugh, you still tslk to Steve? I can't believe he still works here after what he did at the christmas party. What a creep..."

And so every episode she uses clues that this voice unknowingly gives up about who they are to go visit who they think the voice might be. Just to check if that person is still alive.

Gender isn't certain. Nothing is certain. And then it's not evfn clear if this really is a paranormal event, or if she's just skitzophrenic.

But every episide, she goes and visits a person from her past. And every episode that person is still alive.

So imagine they have Raven back on some show. Any random Raw or Smackdown. And for some reason he's just wearing the hardcore title. The commentary doesn't say a word about it.

Then next week, R-Truth just has it. He says he had a ref, and beat Raven for it. It's 24/7 rule, and he beat Raven after the show.

Then the next week Chad Gable has it. Says he beat R-Truth for the belt after the show.

Then the next week Dominic Mysterio has it.

Next week Baron Corbin has it.

And so on and so on. Never explaining the title switches. Never showing anything. Just sometime around 1am, WWE will retweet some random wrestler saying they beat so n so for it in a parking lot.

And you'll get several of these tweets per day, and then randomly someone else is the champ for like 15 hours. Who has the belt means absolutely nothing more than a long running joke. You NEVER see the matches.

Until randomly at Wrestlemania, Cody Rhodes has the belt. He's defending the WWE Championship from Roman Reigns. Reigns loses, but it's one of those loses where after the pinfall they're just laying on the mat forever. And then Roman trying to get to his feet colapses on top of Cody. The ref drops down, counts the pinfall, and Codys victory music stops playing. Everybody is confused, the ref leans through the ropes to talk to Lillian Garcia, who then announces "Ladies and Gentlemen! And NEEEEWWWWWW Hardcore champion!!!! Roman Reigns!!!!"

And that's how Wrestlemania 41 goes off the air.

Book it you cowards!!!

As a Clevelander myself, who's only been to Columbus once, I must ask. What is life like for you guys? Cleveland is this strange place where people assume it sucks, but then they visit, and they love it.

But I know how the REST of Ohio is. We're basically 3 big cities, and a whole lot of suckage! Being that you're a suburb of one of the big 3, do you consider yourself to be city folk, or farmers?

Do you cheer for Cleveland sports, or Cincinnati sports? Legally you're not allowed to say you cheer for Michigan instead. Otherwise we'll have to carve your eyes out with a wooden smile, while gleefully smiling.

Ta-ta for now!

So last night, I have my tablet, and I'm laying in bed, watching dynamite. I don't USUALLY fall asleep in bed, but then Jericho came on, and Rene was interviewing him....and......something about Ocho.....zzzzzzz

I still have to watch the rest of Dynamite now....

So, I'm on the bus, and it smells fine. Lady sits down next to me, she smells like cat piss.

I move to a different seat, and notice this guy smells like he barfed all over himself.

I move again, and this guy smells like he's been smoking for 40 years, and worn the same shirt the whole time.

Get off that bus, and head to the rapid. I sit down, and the next guy to sit down in front of me smells like he doesn't know what a shower is.

Cleveland! Do you understand that before you leave your house, you're supposed to brush your teeth, wash your hair, take a shower, wear clean clothes, and generally clean yourself regularly? My routine is once when I wake up, before I leave for work. Then again when I come home from work.

Smoking is disgusting, and you're disgusting for doing it.

And fucking hell, why does every bus stop smell like urine??? You guys realize these aren't bathrooms, right?