Do you men like it when the woman pushes a finger or dildo into your ass during sex and provides additional stimulation?

Just ask first 🙂 don't go all "no one expects the Spanish inquisition!"

Issue I've run into is partners don't realize they need lube to do that. Spit kinda works but not really.

You can even just play with the hole and not put anything in and it'll feel nice.

Hopefully it is clear that you should ask and communicate. 😀 With a little lubricant it is definitely easier and more fun. If I do it myself while jerking off, then the finger goes in quite well without lubricant, but if the woman does it, please do so with a little moisture. Playing at the hole is also very exciting and you don't always have to push something in.
- I have other things I can push in for you too, big guy 😉

Tried both, I generally prefer on the butthole than in the butthole

But I haven't tried every toy or every combination of butt + sex stuff either!

As always, with life and sex, open, honest, clear, communication is the key to satisfaction

both are great and very exciting. It always depends on the mood and who you are having sex with.

I had only tried a rather small dildo so far and that was nice.

you are definitely right. Communication is incredibly important and can make everything easier and better.

Nope.

Yes. Achieved the illusive p-orgasm once. But it's super hard to do and I've been on the hunt for it ever since.

Do you really find it that difficult?
- I feel like this is one of those "everybody and every body is different" scenarios. But yeah, I've only gotten it once.
- I certainly find it tricky. I don't think I've achieved it yet. All I've managed so far is make it feel more intense. I haven't figured out what I'm doing wrong.

2 thoughts here:

During penetrative sex, eh. Honestly, it makes it tough for me to stay hard (despite it feeling good)
It can never be a surprise for me. Being clean is a hard rule, so spontaneous butt stuff is a no.

It makes me even harder during sex, so I'm lucky. You really can't always do it spontaneously.
being clean how do you assure that? do you rinse your insides?

No. I've tried prostate massage, and it does absolutely nothing for me. It's not painful, but it's also not enjoyable; it mostly just feels mildly awkward. I genuinely do not see what gay men get out of it on the receiving end.

The idea that all men likes it, and men that don't like it just haven't tried it correctly yet is just... Dumb. Like, it's a level of stupid that's on the order of insisting that lesbians just haven't had the right dick yet.

Oh for sure! I'm still trying to get my wife to do that for me. Currently I just put in a plug

Yes.

I've never had it before so I can't speak to the reality. But it's one of my biggest turn-ons and desires.

I like it. I finger myself sometimes. The last time I tried it with my previous partner, I gave her a pair of thick rubber kitchen gloves so her manicured nails wouldn't be a hygiene issue. She used oil-based lube and stuck a couple fingers in. It didn't feel great, but I would have preferred she continue rather than stopping at the slightest sign of discomfort. Pain and nonconsent are my kinks, but I've accepted that few people are true sadists.

I haven't had as many male partners, nor have my male relationships lasted as long. It's not that I don't like guys, but my type is more effeminate and cute while still dominant. Very, very few people like that in the world.

Yes with proper lubrication. Just playing around with the finger tip is amazing! A plug can also be great. Past a few inches you're nearing "train for it" territory and it may start to be uncomfortable or painful. Everyone needs to learn their body and its limits ofc.

If the answer is no for anyone, they just haven't done it right.