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VOY 3x26: Scorpion Part 1
Is there some kind of Starfleet form I can sign to opt out of transporter hacks you "just came up with"?
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Could I theoretically lock onto the poop in my lower intestine and the piss in my bladder and beam them out of myself so I don't have to go to the toilet?
Lol, a few years ago on the alien site, I wrote a scene for The Orville as a "what if The Orville suddenly got transporters" That was basically the premise of it.
If there's interest, and I can find it (I saved it to a text file somewhere before nuking my account), I can post it here.
Please, enlighten me with your wisdom.
Found it in "Unsaved Document 4.txt" LOL
MERCER: I have to pee. Bortus, you have the conn. BORTUS: Aye, sir. MALLOY: Why not just use the teleporter? GRAYSON: You pee in the teleporter booth? That's disgusting! MALLOY: What?! No! Of course not. Watch. [The bridge crew watch as Mallloy presses buttons on his console to initiate a site-to-site teleport. He then switches the main screen to display a view off the starboard bow where an amber blob of liquid materializes and begins to boil and freeze into an icy nebula] MALLOY: Ahhhhh. MERCER: Did you just...? Gordon, you're relieved. MALLOY: You bet I am! MERCER: No, I mean get out. GRAYSON: Wait a minute. I remember right after we got the teleporters installed, we spent two months in orbit around Galavar VI. During that time their moon mysteriously and miraculously developed a ring system. That was you? LAMARR: Yeah, I, uh, might have helped with that. ALARA: Me too. MALLOY: Yeah, and even Issac got in on it. ISSAC: That is impossible as I am an artificial lifeform and do not produce urine. However, I do require periodic coolant flushes which could be considered crudely analogous. MALLOY: And do you have any record of coolant flushes during that time? ISSAC: [BEAT] I do not. To use your parlance: You. Bastard. BORTUS: Is that why my Ja'loja is late this year? Dr. Finn was unable to determine...[INTERRUPTED BY MERCER] MERCER: [PICARD FACEPALM] Oh my God. [BEAT] You know what? It's fine. Gordon, you're fine. Return to your station and set a course for Galavar VI. We've got to go tell them their holy miracle ring is just a bunch of piss. It's fine. GRAYSON: Ed? MERCER: You know what they say: there's a good story and a bunch of idiots behind every warning label.LoL I wouldn't surprise if this is actually a real idea from the show's writers. Fit the show so well. Though the show's runners has made it clear that they do not want to use a teleporter because the story would be much more interesting without one or something like that.
Brilliant work!
No. Piss is stored in the balls.
You could save money on circumcisions by beaming your foreskin out into space