Apparently saying accept your father for who they are is victim blaming
Apparently saying accept your father for who they are is victim blaming
Apparently I don't have the mods account it's just verified on the app. Seems like mods on certain comms just make up whatever placeholder reasoning when you don't break the rules. I thought you had to blame the victim to victim blame and my post didn't blame anyone for anything.
YDI, telling someone to accept their abusive parents on a mental health community absolutely is victim blaming. Seriously, they probably should've banned you for that one it's just extremely shitty and unhelpful, possibly even dangerous.
Wrong I said accept that they're negative person. Completely different
Apparently I don't have the mods account it's just verified on the app
I'm the mod. If you want to see which mods do what, https://phtn.app/ shows it all iirc.
This was the context you left out: https://lemmy.dbzer0.com/post/38049576
A post on [email protected] of you telling someone they should accept their abusive parents. Seriously? And you think comparing yourself to their father is a good thing?
Seems like mods on certain comms just make up whatever placeholder reasoning when you don't break the rules. I thought you had to blame the victim to victim blame and my post didn't blame anyone for anything.
Really? You think you can go to a mental health community and tell victims to just accept their abusers? Read the room, man. I just inherited the community, too, so i'm not done actually revamping the rules.
I, and anybody else who had abusive parents would look at this and flat out say YDI.
I said accept that their father is a negative person, not accept their abuser as you put it. It's actually good advice are they supposed to think constantly about their father is verbally abusive, not repress it?
Really? You think you can go to a mental health community and tell victims to just accept their abusers?
That may be inappropriate and I may disagree with him but it is not a victim blaming. He may have broken other rules (I am not familiar with that particular community) but not this one.
Looking at your responses in the most favorable way you are using the word accept in a different way than what people typically mean when they say "accept your family". Comment should still be removed, though.
Yeah I can't blame people for not understanding me and thinking a completely different thing based on one word I used
Pardon my French, but what I'm getting from your message is that you enjoy being an asshole (put out negative energy).
If so, don't you find it "interesting" when someone else (the mod in question) "puts out" negative energy towards you? That might be interesting for the mod as well.
Every day is a gift right? Well, accepting the mod's action will help you out. You "have to accept" that.
...
Pardon my French
Putain de bordel de merde ça me casse les couilles, we are not that vulgar.
Ah, the language of love! Magnifique!
Pepe?
I like how I get to the end and no one explains how I'm wrong, but yeah you're pushing out negative energy but you're doing this for some perceived sense of justice or you want to hurt my feelings. I'm stating how the world is, it's not like I'm creating negative people
it’s not like I’m creating negative people
Very wrong there, negative dude. There's a couple sayings related to this, I'll exemplify.
- a rotten apple spoils the bunch
- what you give is what you get
- for every action, there's an equal and opposite reaction
- at every party there's always a downer to sour the mood
There's plenty explanations how you're wrong, you're just not getting them. But I'll try to explain it with your negative energy thing.
Negative energy seeks out positive energy and sucks it out, leaving only negative energy behind. So the only result of that is negative energy meeting negative energy. Your negative energy brings out the negative energy in others and they have no choice but to send their negative energy back your way. That's how the world is.
Reading the context provided in the other comments, I'm gonna have to go with YDI here as well.
Why's that?
Yeah I'd say you're just being an inconsiderate asshole here. Then again, I have this feeling you get that a lot and you've just accepted yourself as who you are.
I have accept who I am? How am I being inconsiderate asshole? I generally think it's nice to actually care enough to give advice
Are you for real? :D I can see now you haven't accepted yourself for who you are, as you cannot see the fault in yourself here. But maybe saying "you are an inconsiderate asshole" is wrong, as I don't even know you, but rather that you constantly come across as an inconsiderate asshole. Like did you at all stop to think how your "advice" (that you so graciously have gifted the OOP with) might be perceived by someone in their position? Can you at all place yourself into "their shoes" so to say and gauge how your actions (or rather words in this case) might make them feel? It's ok if you don't, I can't do that always, but I acknowledge that as a personal shortcoming.
YDI, y i k e s
Gotta go with YDI here. This was posted in a mental health community which has this rule:
All posts and comments must be helpful and supportive. Do not put vulnerable people at risk.
OP was venting about their abusive parents and the mental health problems they struggle with because of that abuse. You were not helping OP. OP's story resonated with me and I absolutely would not want to read your comment if I were them, I would be pretty offended by it.
I disagree with your comment but don't think such comments should be deleted by mods unless it's specifically posted in a positivity-focused community. If users have a different opinion they can downvote the comment or put their arguments in a separate comment below.
This was the context: https://lemmings.world/comment/13713743
unless it's specifically posted in a positivity-focused community
Mental health discussion doesn't have to be all positive, but telling someone they should accept abusers is completely wrong.