Lemmy is a worse platform for women than Reddit was
Lemmy is a worse platform for women than Reddit was
(Content warning, discussions of SA and misogyny, mods I might mention politics a bit but I hope this can be taken outside the context of politics and understood as a discussion of basic human decency)
We all know how awful Reddit was when a user mentioned their gender. Immediate harassment, DMs, etc. It's probably improved over the years? But still awful.
Until recently, Lemmy was the most progressive and supportive of basic human dignity of communities I had ever followed. I have always known this was a majority male platform, but I have been relatively pleased to see that positive expressions of masculinity have won out.
All of that changed with the recent "bear vs man" debacle. I saw women get shouted down just for expressing their stories of being sexually abused, repeatedly harassed, dogpiled, and brigaded with downvotes. Some of them held their ground, for which I am proud of them, but others I saw driven to delete their entire accounts, presumably not to return.
And I get it. The bear thing is controversial; we can all agree on this. But that should never have resulted in this level of toxicity!
I am hoping by making this post I can kind of bring awareness to this weakness, so that we can learn and grow as a community. We need to hold one another accountable for this, or the gender gap on this site is just going to get worse.
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The introverted tech nerds have always had a problem with dismissing anything they don't immediately understand
They/we do have that problem, I agree, but I still think it's worth holding people (even nerds) to a higher standard. For instance by taking the time to walk them through to a more empathetic perspective.
absolutely, i don't know that it's fair to attack them with inflammatory statements, but it's definitely a problem.
Definitely. I'd be such a stupid little bigot, perhaps unintentionally, if not for the labour of several people who chose to give a shit about be over the years.
personally i think i just ended up shifting over the years, less as a result of other people coaxing it, but my life experiences leading to a certain point where things seem to congregate together properly.
Regardless, talking about problems is the only way to fix them, so if we aren't talking about them, we can't expect them to get fixed either.
i'm taking this personally, as an introverted and probably very socially neurotic tech nerd. I don't always completely understand things.
But since i'm a fucking tech nerd, and i don't understand 90% of the things around me, i need to learn about these things in order to be capable of being a tech nerd. Thus i have it quite literally ingrained into my own being, that i shouldn't dismiss anything i don't immediately understand, or have a full opinion of. Because there are a lot of things out there, and i can't try all of them, but not all of them are bad, and not all of them are good.
Maybe then it's a matter of falsely believing they understand all the parameters; bears, men, woods, all data accounted for. When actually their missing the unsaid 'I'm just complaining about violent men'
or maybe it has nothing to do with the fact that they're introverted nerds, and they're just shit people. Things can just be independent sometimes.
although to be fair to you, that is a reasonable interpretation of it. Though still not fair to point of inflammatory statement. Because the person responsible for stating something entirely irrelevant to the underlying problem was not them so it would seem weird to me, to negatively judge a group of people well known for not really being good at social communication, nor being able to think outside of certain mindsets. Given that it seems like a targeted attack specifically to those kinds of people, because they're easy to yell at. Since they often don't have the same understanding of the situation as you do.