Yes, there's a group chat I share with others with a common interest and we've all become supportive friends. I also have a mod chat with my fellow mods because it's way easier than using the native mod functions on reddit. The mod chat is actually pretty bad and harder to get to, plus when notifications work (they're not working correctly now for chat), it was also easier.
I also had some friendships chats with people one on one that I've gotten to know from my years on reddit. All gone. The only thing left is the new group chat and our mod chat because it was most recent. It's honestly a bummer.
I wasn't really trying to answer the question of if he knew or not. idk if he did or not. I was just agreeing, based on what someone informed me, that yes what you said is probably correct, that he didn't initially realize it. I guess my point is, it doesn't really matter when he realized. He was added without permission, and removed himself. The fact that he was or wasn't mod doesn't negate the fact the reddit tolerated these subs and he has done plenty of shit that's easily proven that it's not like anyone really needs this issue to be the defining moment.
Apparently in the early days of reddit, you could add anyone as mod and you didn't need to accept, it just automatically added you. IDK when that changed, but I was told by a user on modcoord that spez was added to that sub without his knowledge. I mean it's bad enough that admin allowed subs like this to proliferate and continue their activity.
The guy is a major DB, and has, for sure, done a lot of questionable to unethical stuff, but apparently modding that sub knowingly isn't accurate. I like to be right when I'm criticizing the dude and there's plenty to choose from.