Thoughts on bring thankful? Personal experiences?
Thoughts on bring thankful? Personal experiences?
Not talking about thanking others, but like a way of thinking that I find often especially with religious people, the whole "oh you're sad you can't afford good food? Be thankful you have legs" etc... I don't like it and I don't feel comfortable about it, is there like research to back it up or deny it, do you have any personal experience with it?
I am grateful to have work, as I have been without it. In spite of the fact that they underpay and overwork me.
I am grateful to have an apartment the size of a prison cell that I can still barely manage to afford, as I have been without shelter. I am grateful to have a landlord who allowed me some leeway with payment. In spite of him still charging me a violent price to merely inhabit his space.
I am grateful to have food, even if it is overpriced, uberprocessed garbage, as I have been without.
Point being... I think being grateful is a necessity at times merely to survive. I'm grateful because I have to be. It's most certainly a defense mechanism against capitalism when one lives under a capitalist system however, and you are onto something with the religious connections. This is the opium of the masses presenting us one reason for its namesake.
It is ok to not feel grateful, of course. We must never stop demanding what we are owed and some of us are owed far, far more than others.
Nothing wrong with being thankful, plenty wrong with being conformist.
I think there is some value to being grateful if you're in a reasonably good place. Personally, it helps me anchor myself and my emotions better as someone who constantly worries about something.
The same reasoning behind not comparing yourself to others who have it way better than you still applies though. There will always be those who are much better off and those that are much worse off so it's important not get carried away or feel like your problems are not worth worrying or complaining about.
But I also know that whenever it's brought up by other people it's usually to say that your problems don't matter which is why I'm saying it should be something personal. Mostly for basic things like being in good health, having access to food and shelter and not living in a warzone.
Nothing wrong with being thankful, but what you mention does seem to increase drastically with the actual circumstances.
“I have terminal cancer and I’m in agony every day, but at least I’m not (insert somehow worse circumstance)”
I think it’s a form of copium, where we feel like our circumstances are really bad, but there is actually probably somebody going through something worse. It’s like how some people going through some drama in their lives will watch shows about serial killers to see that the drama is lower in comparison to that.
It would certainly be inappropriate to say that to someone else, but if someone going through circumstances wants to cope this way, it also feels wrong to say that they shouldn’t be able to.
It's ok to be thankful.
To enforce thankfulness and deligitimise somoene else's concerns is a shitty move.
Thankfulness to me implies acknowledging the good parts my own life's situation and fighting for the people that don't have access to the same stuff I am thankful for.
We have some power to reflect, voice concerns, and fight for people that don't have a chance to do the same for themselves, therefore we must!
it doesn't put the meat in the basket