kiss kiss bang bang

16 comments

This guy is gonna have so many girls wanting to marry him while in jail. GIVE ME THE ADDRESS, I NEED TO WRITE TO HIM FIRST!!
- He's still gonna spend his entire life on death row, you just know they're gonna throw the entire bookshelf at him.
  
  NY outlawed capital punishment.
- It's just the usual dime a dozen fame chasing hoes. He can do better.
Mine was:

Most likely to be arrested in a McDonald's.
- Headline: RATS FOUND AT MCDONALDS
Charming and attractive, there’s no way that a ton of super normal people didn’t immediately recognize him, then actively chose to stay quiet.
- Except for some random class traitor.
Hey babe, you with UnitedHealthcare?

Cuz imma hafta terminate dat policy
- Hey babe are you with united health care? I'm gonna give you backshots you'll never forget.
Also quite good at put-down crimes
- It's only a crime if the jury agrees

16 comments