Trump taps Rep. Matt Gaetz as attorney general
Trump taps Rep. Matt Gaetz as attorney general
President-elect Donald Trump said he will nominate Republican Rep. Matt Gaetz of Florida to serve as U.S. attorney general.
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The Cabinet list so far, as it was officially leaked moments ago on NudeAfrica.com:
State - Matt Gaetz
Treasury - Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino
Interior - A t-shirt cannon
Justice - DraftKings®
Agriculture - owner of that McDonald’s
Commerce - currently accepting bids
Labor - Immortan Joe
Defense - Vladimir Putin
Housing and Urban Development - it’s Trump, so probably Herschel Walker, ffs
Transportation - Elon Musk’s twitter account
Energy - V. Putin
Health and Human Services - sold off and privatized between Nestlé, Saudi Aramco, and Ticketmaster
Education - Kid Rock, Marjorie Taylor-Greene, and Lauren Boebert, and all sewn together as a human centipede
Veterans' Affairs - Captain Morgan; under secretaries Jack Daniels and Jim Beam
Homeland Security - Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, once the check clears
56 1 ReplySatire is dead. I earnestly predict at least one more pick on this list proves actually true.
21 0 ReplyThe Onion writers: "Let's go with this one, the real picks are too over the top."
9 0 ReplyJust need Camacho on that list.
1 0 ReplyPoor Camacho gets shit for being thick, but when the world's smartest man turned up he asked his advice gave him a job. Eventually.
2 0 ReplyThat is a very valid point. He had the strength to yield. The problem with our real world Camacho is he's too weak to do that.
1 0 Reply
Matt "Pizza" Gaetz
Kristi "Ol Yeller" Noem
4 0 ReplyHousing and urban development will probably be that guy who owns Monarch real estate investment. Large scale slumlord.
2 0 Reply