We took a small notebook and each wrote 25 things we would want to do. Then we took a $100, put a sparkly red heart sticker on it and when one of us felt like doing something different we would give the bill to the other person and cash in one of the items. Cross all of those items out and added more items to the book.
We didn’t really need to spice things up, we loved bdsm, forced orgasms, had a free use type relationship, a bajillion dollars in sex toys and sexy clothes. (Fellas, I’m just going to put this out there. I know we don’t think about clothes being sexy for us, fuck that noise and embrace that shit. She fucking laughed the first time I surprised her by wearing mesh underwear. That shit lasted like 10 minutes and then she couldn’t keep her hands off of me. Sexy is a state of mind just as much, if not more, than the state of your body). Anyway….so the notebook just gave us different things to try, but also led to deeper conversations about what we like and wanted more of.
Anytime a girlfriend suggest we try something novel.
More specifically, when my first partner asked me to tie her up. I had always rejected BDSM because it didn’t seem “respectful” to the bottom. I learned something new about myself that day and it led to a lot of fun times together.