The servers (instances) aspect and different communities (forums on topics) on different servers and servers blocking others, is a mess if I'm being honest. It's the biggest flaw. I still find it hard to find communities of topics I want..
I think my main problem with the fediverse in general is that if I click a link to something on a different instance from an external site, I can't instantly interact with it on my account (subscribe, vote, comment etc). I have to go back to the instance my account is on, then search for that post and hope that the fediverse has connected those two servers, then hope I'm actually able to find it, then I can interact with it. This could probably be best mitigated by some sort of solution like an app or browser extension that does those steps automatically.
Sorry, I've been hearing so much flak from people complaining defederation exists at all (in the same universe where, for example, Zuckerberg exists) that I didn't pay attention to anything else you were saying. My bad take.