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Busses/trams can hit 0 red lights and not get stuck in traffic if they have their own lanes and transit priority signals
One of the reasons I loved taking the train to work (yay, Portland MAX!) was that I didn't have to do the work to drive. I got on the train, snagged a seat (or stood on really busy days) and mentally punched out for 20 minutes. I could read a book, zone out, or make some notes on my thoughts.
At the end of the route, I'd hop off, walk two blocks and I was at a work. Reverse it to go home. It was a dream commute.
Driving Hwy 26 would have taken longer, and the sheer stress it caused was horrible. Always having to watch for someone deciding to dart lanes, merge badly, slow to a stop, shimmy forward, wait for a person to merge into the crawl. Commuting by car on any kind of busy road is horrible for your health.
Driving Hwy 26 would have taken longer
That's valid for your area but it's very circumstantial.
Commuting by car on any kind of busy road is horrible for your health.
I guess for some, but I've been driving in this kind of traffic for a decade, it doesn't phase me.
snagged a seat (or stood on really busy days)
Personally I'd rather sit comfortably in my driver's chair for 40 minutes, listening to podcast or something in the privacy of my car, than stand in a crowded train for 20 minutes.
But a bus will also be stopping at other places that are not my destination.
True, but you'd probably be surprised at how often you're actually stopped or going very slowly because of traffic when driving, especially in cities. If you compare the driving and transit times between most subway stops on Google Maps, the subway (closest thing to signal priority on a bus in most places) is almost always quicker
In a city sure, but I reckon most car drivers are in suburban / rural areas.
Fully rural driving is absolutely going to be faster than any attempt at transit can be. But most suburbs were built so people could live there and drive into the nearest city for work, so even if the driver lives in a suburban area, the longest part of their drive will almost certainly be the city bit. So I would argue for both cities and suburbs, transit can be faster than diving if done well.
But what if your specific commute isn't that congested and traffic is only a minor inconvenience?
Moreover, how do those things cover the other benefits of cars?
Direct line from home to office that runs on my schedule and can change route at any time I choose.
The ability to run a little late without missing the ride all together.
I don't have to share it with strangers.
I have significantly more space for transporting things.
There's no interconnecting travel. It's just front door to car, car to front door.
It doubles as a mobile locker, shelter, bench, and lunchroom. All private.
And I don't say all that to downplay the need for public transit, just that if the goal is to get more people on it, you're not going to convince them to give up their cars only to avoid traffic.
Genuinely, I'd rather sit in my car in traffic than lose all the other benefits of it with public transit.
I think you're pretty lucky if you've got an uncongested commute. For most places where people live a "driving" distance from work it generally gets pretty congested during rush hour.
For covering the benefits of a car, transit has some of its own benefits (mostly health benefits, but done right, travel time can be shorter), but I'll go through why losing the benefits you've listed don't worry me too much:
Direct line that can change route if necessary: my house and work are both close enough to transit stops that I essentially have a direct line from home to office. I'm not changing my route that often, but if I needed to get something on the way I'd rather just hop off and back on than have to find somewhere to park.
Ability to run late: I'll mostly agree with you here in some cases, but the key is frequency. Missing a train and having to wait an hour for the next one sucks, but I've never thought about "missing" a subway, the next one will be there in like 2 mins. If you have to look at a schedule for transit, it's doing a bad job. You should just show up and get whisked away in the next couple minutes when done right.
Strangers: fair, I don't mind much, but if an issue for you then it's an issue for you
Transporting things: The biggest thing I'm generally transporting is groceries, and I've never had a problem putting them on a bus (or more recently in my bike panniers, I was shocked at how much stuff you can fit in a pannier). But I also know a guy who brought a rowing machine home on transit, so if there's a will there's a way.
No interconnecting travel: I think this is only an issue if the connections are infrequent or badly timed. The same issue with "running late". When I hop off a subway and get on another line at the same station I barely even think about it. And I almost think of this one as a benefit, walking to and from stops and at transfers is free exercise. Take enough transit and you'll never have to use a treadmill in your life.
Multipurpose: I'll give you mobile locker, that's pretty nice (a bit expensive for my taste though). I think this goes back to the "stranger" point. I think shelters, benches, and lunch rooms should be public places. A public bench does a lot more good than a parking spot in my opinion.
While I agree there's no way to get everyone out of their cars and onto public transit (short of banning cars), the goal is just to make it a viable alternative. Even as someone who would just rather drive, if public transit is fast, frequent, and reliable enough, other people might be convinced which reduces traffic for you