I noticed ai likes to assume ur a boy and ignore if ur not. When i played NovelAI it let me ban words so i would add every boy pronoun. Is it there a FOSS selfhosted way? I currently use koboldai with tavernai
SillyTavern is a fork of TavernAI that lets you do more things. Perhaps look into that? Also you can just adjust the system prompt to have the LLM assume that you're not a boy.
If you use the persona system, you can put "<insert persona name> is a girl", otherwise "Refer to me as a girl throughout the conversation" would be fine
What kind of LLM are you using? Depending on its effectiveness, you can put "this is a chat between you and me" (or whatever you and AI identify as) in the system prompt.