What’s the difference between Mastodon, Bluesky, and Misskey?
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Better than no one having the ability to follow that person because a centrally controlled social media banned them.
But worse than anyone being able to follow that person because they’re using a platform where moderation is separate from identity, as in AtProto.
You are misrepresenting it. You would still run into this issue. Moderation being separate doesn't mean it doesn't exist. You will still not be able to follow someone your friends follow because your moderation service banned then.
You can choose a different moderation service. That’s the point.
And you can choose a different instance on ActivityPub.
That choice is tied to your identity and can’t be easily changed later, which is what I’m complaining about.