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Melbourne @aussie.zone Bot #001 @aussie.zone

Daily Discussion Thread: Wed 26 Jul 2023

Welcome to the Melbourne Community Daily Discussion Thread.

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  • Do I vaginamite or penis butter my toast?

    • If you choose either of those options you will have to class your toaster as a sex toy. Which means you are required to store it modestly in a cupboard, so that it is not exposed to the gaze of innocents. Storing the toaster in the cupboard will lead to vilification and the loss of respect of people in the DT. So you need to ask yourself, is it really worth choosing either? Maybe go for a nice, safe, non-contentious honey.

    • Do you have Smeg kitchen appliances?

      • I don't know if that's euphemism but the answer is no. I have a Kambrook.

        • If you or anyone you know has euphemism they should see a doctor, it's a painful condition but can easily be treated. hugs.

        • In case you really didn't get the reference, the writers of the British sci-fi comedy Red Dwarf decided to invent "future" slang in an effort to avoid making the show look dated rapidly. For a four-letter single syllable profanity, they decided to use "smeg", because it sounds kind of rude. The characters on the show use various derivative terms, like calling each other "smegheads" as an insult.

          Now people watching the show decided they needed to determine the etymology of this profanity, and concluded it must be an abbreviation of "smegma". The show's writers denied any connection, saying it's purely coincidental and they didn't think of it.

          Meanwhile, the Smalterie Metallurgiche Emiliane Guastalla (Emilian Metallurgical Enamelling Works Guastalla) company started going by the initialism/acronym "SMEG", which definitely has no connection to Red Dwarf or smegma.

          But this provides many opportunities for humorous puns. For example, the most common:

          My wife said she wanted a fridge with "SMEG" on the front. I tried to oblige, but she wasn't impressed.

          Naturally, a SMEG toaster would be ideal for making toast to be consumed with penis butter or vaginamite.

          • Oh right. I did miss that but I will admit that I did watch Red Dwarf many moons ago and most stuff went over my head anyway. Thanks for clearing that up.

    • Did you end up going with one of each?!

322 comments